All will be short and sweet
22 Oct 1830 - 1930 Appetizer went out to buy 2130 we are our main course...... We really went to buy so that we can do it....that is the first time we have the intention....putting it on is quite amusing...then we just enjoy the whole process....of course I didn't discharge....so the thing can still do it.
23 Oct 2200 - after playing strip poker....after another game....then she got the hint and she is the winner.....winner of the tic tac toe too...... and I counter up bet and she accept - one on top side way was time limit.....side way was really exciting....we just get into the action.... and my want to discharge...but no time
24 Oct she allow me indulge after long K.....and help me all the way....to the point that I don't want to stop....also reminded her to lock the door......
27 Oct kissed from 2030?? all the way 2200 when I finish my stuff then we go all the way....till 23000 then we move to next phase..... you off ifrst the you touch mine to the point u take out mine....then u over me..... Not sure u preparing or just can't align properrly..... then u align mine to yours a few times... the final one when it is finally aligned, I give 1 thrust.... but it is too much for me...then I discharge and u wanted more...haha....
29 Oct 2016..... I am the breakfast from 0830 - 0930...you on top I bottom slow and steady...no discharge still... u still want me to discharge inside you.... if now is your menses.... I may say ok....
after staying over.... after sharing bed...sleeping... I am glad she enjoys it...though not the best position for her.... we really for once did it...... with practise and skill....a feat acquired and achieved....well...she can feel me throughout the whole thing..... I am just glad I can help satisfy her in this area.....
I can't remember how may we did..... we really progress......a speed that even I was astonished and surprised.....when perhaps to cut down? Really the passion is difficult to manage.....Well......this is high risk period.... The next time? not sure when as any time can happen..... anytime anywhere...just a matter of degree only. Well I mentioned to her perhaps we should stop by the end of this year...next year focus on preparing..... We will see how things goes ba..... Staycation dec..... another one.....then mid nov maybe another one...... not sure how....but it is really now easy to do ...harder to abstain....haha....but I really love her and just wish to spend the rest of my life with her....
Let God take reign..... His gift and his love..... not to let it go.....let it God....
So how from a heart to just help her overcome her fear that develops to full scale...all the way thing....even I am amazed how come I am willing to do with her... I have no answers..... I am now part of her issue.....inseperatable ....and together we will face the future together....
Sunday, October 30, 2016
Saturday, October 22, 2016
17/18/20/21.....momemts that determines it all.......it is just waiting to happen
17 Oct....she flew back....we really missed each other... despite the time....we just do it..we build build build...... I though we have limits....but we just wanted each other ....missed each other too much......so everything went......same as 03 oct 2016.... just no inside...... woah.....then I just take cab home.....1.5 hours rest.... to go for next day....and next round.... I was finished once....so let see how I can fare 2 days in a row....
18 Oct.....same same same.....but this time round.....attempt to go in...but failed....or fail fail fail....coz too tired.....that one is calling for help.... I cant make it... cannot go in....cannot be of shape.... I hope I didn't disappoint her....not sure what she was thinking...but I think I was too tired...2nd day... so I left on time...to go back to rest.....and we feel ya....we should stop there... or did we?
20 Oct ...... after one night of talking and sharing.... I plan for a quick one....though if times allow, then do lol....what level...see how time flows...but she seems all ready....that is first time we M to M in the lift.....she told me she feel high there then already.....after the whole act...... she sat on my lap.....just stimulate.....then change place.....then now smart....dun wait too long...or blood will go elsewhere....when it is of shape....put it in NOW!!!!!!!!
And yes I did....we struggled..... missionary not easy....everything sooooo diffficult.... to me just try lol....at most fail and don't do...it is fine for me.... not sure about her....but eventually we did ..... I told her I am her liao.......siting upright..... we did move a bit....but slowly mine just subside...... and that marks the first time..... I was concern after that she will abandon me....from now on, I am in a journey that I don't know what will come next....
21 Oct no cell....we did it again..... now it is more of practise and figuring out each other....gaps......how do we want to so that we are comfortable.....there are no more limits.....we want we do...... and the next phase is as we talk later.....what is next? continue at high risk or what.....well...see how... I stage 7 of intimacy......when is to apply stage 8...... here the journey gets exciting...the details are no longer the key details now....
We love each other....we are prepared for everything.....so let it be ..let it go....let it God....
18 Oct.....same same same.....but this time round.....attempt to go in...but failed....or fail fail fail....coz too tired.....that one is calling for help.... I cant make it... cannot go in....cannot be of shape.... I hope I didn't disappoint her....not sure what she was thinking...but I think I was too tired...2nd day... so I left on time...to go back to rest.....and we feel ya....we should stop there... or did we?
20 Oct ...... after one night of talking and sharing.... I plan for a quick one....though if times allow, then do lol....what level...see how time flows...but she seems all ready....that is first time we M to M in the lift.....she told me she feel high there then already.....after the whole act...... she sat on my lap.....just stimulate.....then change place.....then now smart....dun wait too long...or blood will go elsewhere....when it is of shape....put it in NOW!!!!!!!!
And yes I did....we struggled..... missionary not easy....everything sooooo diffficult.... to me just try lol....at most fail and don't do...it is fine for me.... not sure about her....but eventually we did ..... I told her I am her liao.......siting upright..... we did move a bit....but slowly mine just subside...... and that marks the first time..... I was concern after that she will abandon me....from now on, I am in a journey that I don't know what will come next....
21 Oct no cell....we did it again..... now it is more of practise and figuring out each other....gaps......how do we want to so that we are comfortable.....there are no more limits.....we want we do...... and the next phase is as we talk later.....what is next? continue at high risk or what.....well...see how... I stage 7 of intimacy......when is to apply stage 8...... here the journey gets exciting...the details are no longer the key details now....
We love each other....we are prepared for everything.....so let it be ..let it go....let it God....
05 Oct Again with things on......and then after knowing it is safe.... a offer of sacrifice on 08 Oct and almost all the way...1st gate
05 Oct 2016 1hr lunch 1830 -> 2330 -> 6 hours -> -> 294.5 hours
07 oct 2016 1830-2330 -> 5 hours -> 299.5 hours
08 oct 2016 0730-2330 -> 16 hours -> 315.5 hours
09 oct 2016 1930-2230 -> 3 hours -> 318.5 hours
10 Oct 2016 1800-2300 -> 5 hours -> 323.5 hours
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
Morning Half way 178.5
Non Cure Treatment 207
We still do it with lips- 241
Near miss with unknown- 274
I already willing and we still do it again: 292 - I didn't blog the previous one yet lol
We plan, chat and went straight for it-- me offer sacrifice -- 299/300-303
Bra 16th
Together 9.5
U did me 4 times
I did u 2 time
05 Oct 2016 We didn't want to do it.....but somehow we did it again...build build build..... this time the last one didn't come out.....we just sigh.......since it is going to be.....mind as way we do it again today...
08 Oct 2016....the day after she say .....her is onz....the period is here.....ok...... instead of not doing.....we really intend to go again....dirty lol messy lol.....don't care...haha....want want mean do do
bloody......no longer we go for H to G....now we go G to G...... so to keep it clean....on the floor.... she on top.....then slightly as like 03 Oct......and she move....this time I really feel very high......very very high..... I was moaning.....woah..... I really enjoy it..... the lubricant...with no worries at that time..... just enjoy fully...... indeed.....then we just need to clean the red red.....and off we go....... to do our daily thing....what will comes next....she go holiday lol..... want to go next phase also cannot and no time.....she also help finish me for the 2/3 time ...... ..
07 oct 2016 1830-2330 -> 5 hours -> 299.5 hours
08 oct 2016 0730-2330 -> 16 hours -> 315.5 hours
09 oct 2016 1930-2230 -> 3 hours -> 318.5 hours
10 Oct 2016 1800-2300 -> 5 hours -> 323.5 hours
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
Morning Half way 178.5
Non Cure Treatment 207
We still do it with lips- 241
Near miss with unknown- 274
I already willing and we still do it again: 292 - I didn't blog the previous one yet lol
We plan, chat and went straight for it-- me offer sacrifice -- 299/300-303
Bra 16th
Together 9.5
U did me 4 times
I did u 2 time
05 Oct 2016 We didn't want to do it.....but somehow we did it again...build build build..... this time the last one didn't come out.....we just sigh.......since it is going to be.....mind as way we do it again today...
08 Oct 2016....the day after she say .....her is onz....the period is here.....ok...... instead of not doing.....we really intend to go again....dirty lol messy lol.....don't care...haha....want want mean do do
bloody......no longer we go for H to G....now we go G to G...... so to keep it clean....on the floor.... she on top.....then slightly as like 03 Oct......and she move....this time I really feel very high......very very high..... I was moaning.....woah..... I really enjoy it..... the lubricant...with no worries at that time..... just enjoy fully...... indeed.....then we just need to clean the red red.....and off we go....... to do our daily thing....what will comes next....she go holiday lol..... want to go next phase also cannot and no time.....she also help finish me for the 2/3 time ...... ..
02 Oct 2016 I am the receiving party with no connection 03 Oct 2016 We purposely build up and really almost
Relationship time sheet
30 sept 1900-2330~>4.5 hours-> 249 hours
1 oct 0700-2330-> 16.5 hours -> 265.5 hours
02 Oct 1745 - 2315 -> 5.5 hours -> 271 hours
03 oct 1 hr lunch 1830-0530 -> 12 hours -> 283 hours
04 Oct 2016 1830 - 0000 -> 5.5 hours -> 288.5 hours
05 Oct 2016 1hr lunch 1830 -> 2230 -> 5 hours -> -> 293.5 hours
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
Morning Half way 178.5
Non Cure Treatment 207
We still do it with lips- 241
Near miss with unknown- 274
Bra 15th
Together 7.5
U did me 4 times
I did u 2 time
02 Oct - Went over as per like sunday......went her room..... not expect much after dinner.....So we enter her place...... I dont remember what happen......I was led..... I was herded.....so it was very comfortable..... lying there....it seems to be i am in position..... just resting for a sunday.....then there she started...... I was surprise...but not wanting to stop her....coz since she is the one who is leading, I don't want to stop her....She is taking initiative.....so I remember asking her...and she replied....she just want to satisfy me....ok.... and she did what I did to her the day before..... though I was not really connected emotion in which later we talked about it and she also sense it.....we were sort of .....in agreement...of something that is unspoken..... I was taken aside....woah ...when she wants it, or wants to doing something, she will do it.... just go straight for it...... I am glad and I am impressed.....and that really open up things for the next day.... I don't think there was full discharge....as how then the day after can do....
03 Oct - We build it up..... then slowly with build.....build build build....... in simple.....off off off.....then last one....we build build build....we can't remember now....then off the last one..... can't remember who on top or who below....the last part is..... with the small one, in mission, I wanted to put in for a while....but just can't do it....coz it is not correct shape, stiffness.....so go through motion....that is close to the time to leave...then we hug....and a surge of emotion on my side.... I teared....though we didn't do it.... but it is enough or too much to take...... and then we said we should nott do it.....but it seems like it will stop then....
30 sept 1900-2330~>4.5 hours-> 249 hours
1 oct 0700-2330-> 16.5 hours -> 265.5 hours
02 Oct 1745 - 2315 -> 5.5 hours -> 271 hours
03 oct 1 hr lunch 1830-0530 -> 12 hours -> 283 hours
04 Oct 2016 1830 - 0000 -> 5.5 hours -> 288.5 hours
05 Oct 2016 1hr lunch 1830 -> 2230 -> 5 hours -> -> 293.5 hours
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
Morning Half way 178.5
Non Cure Treatment 207
We still do it with lips- 241
Near miss with unknown- 274
Bra 15th
Together 7.5
U did me 4 times
I did u 2 time
02 Oct - Went over as per like sunday......went her room..... not expect much after dinner.....So we enter her place...... I dont remember what happen......I was led..... I was herded.....so it was very comfortable..... lying there....it seems to be i am in position..... just resting for a sunday.....then there she started...... I was surprise...but not wanting to stop her....coz since she is the one who is leading, I don't want to stop her....She is taking initiative.....so I remember asking her...and she replied....she just want to satisfy me....ok.... and she did what I did to her the day before..... though I was not really connected emotion in which later we talked about it and she also sense it.....we were sort of .....in agreement...of something that is unspoken..... I was taken aside....woah ...when she wants it, or wants to doing something, she will do it.... just go straight for it...... I am glad and I am impressed.....and that really open up things for the next day.... I don't think there was full discharge....as how then the day after can do....
03 Oct - We build it up..... then slowly with build.....build build build....... in simple.....off off off.....then last one....we build build build....we can't remember now....then off the last one..... can't remember who on top or who below....the last part is..... with the small one, in mission, I wanted to put in for a while....but just can't do it....coz it is not correct shape, stiffness.....so go through motion....that is close to the time to leave...then we hug....and a surge of emotion on my side.... I teared....though we didn't do it.... but it is enough or too much to take...... and then we said we should nott do it.....but it seems like it will stop then....
Sunday, October 02, 2016
30 Sept & 1 Oct
Relationship time sheet
30 sept 1900-2330~>4.5 hours-> 249 hours
1 oct 0700-2330-> 16.5 hours -> 265.5 hours
02 Oct 1730 - 2200 -> 5.5 hours -> 271 hours
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
Morning Half way 178.5
Non Cure Treatment 207
We still do it with lips- 241
Bra 14th
Together 6.5
U did me 3 times
I did u 1 time
30 Sept.....no cg.... she no need OT.... I went with my colleauge K(different K) for coffee and his rolex bontique shop....he is into watches.... good service....a PRC serve us
Then about 1830 I met K.....at dhoby ghaut....up and down the escalator we find try ....finally....then we went eat jap restuarant .... ichiban.....shared a combo meal and 1 sushi..... don't remember what we chatted....thanks giving, no N to N.....no M to Fore. we walked around...she shopped for her Twin star.....coaxing me to buy for her for whatever occasion... I said no....coz I already got something liao..or in the midst of getting something....too early.... cannot spoil grand plan...ahha....and it is from Japan.... all from japan what.... zzzzz
So we took a long journey back...she was cold.....and she tried to hug me.....awkward position...then she is doing everything she can to warm herself up....then carousing my arm and hand quite often..... I was quite sensitive somehow and it is building up.... until we change to Tanah Merah ...then back to her home...... no hell went loose though.....it was about 2230....then 2330... can't really remember what we did....other than reading the word.... then hugging and that is..... nothing too much.... somehow the linger feeling from the bus journey stays on...or stood on.... so after I go back, I told her we should go round 2....haha....
1 Oct...woke up 4am and to leave on 0530....surprising I reach her place 0640....then I told her....round 2 ok I even message her to lock the doors too... ops...so obvious.......kiss her on the forehead.....and then everything went through....N to N......we hugged....and then yup..... she was in the whole experience..... we miscomm on some signally....ops...didnt know the different between just slip under and reduce one layer.... haha....well M to body.. M to tummy....to neck and otheres..... really H to G.......she even ask me to help her.....so direct but ok I obliged....the position was awkward she lay down... i sit up right....we talked later as she wanted me to lay down ...but I find it awkward too. then M to B.........and I finish it by about 0733...with alarm preset.....so later with 7 more minutes, I lay onto her bed.... have her on me....and let her do what she want to do la.... I just want to get some sleep later while she can prepare herself.....she also moved a bit...but I smack her butt....saying the pre-agreed is no G to G or Hp.... so with little time, she went to prepared...she mentioned she wanted to return the favor but there is just not enough time.....
Met my good buddy.... Bchiny....he has his second breakfast.....we chatted.....talk about year end trip.... coming wednesday booking it liao.... at the usual mac place near his place....
then we took luggage back home, lunch at subway, shared subway melt...started my finance control.
At her place...nothing happened.... but I somewhat said something that trigger her to cry....ok...then we already decided we want to discuss somethings....so we went airport, drank starbucks.....chatting on communication and more things...although initially wanted to talked about physical intimacy....well God has his way...the sermon was powerful....no more excuse...excuse vs reasons.....This is 1 oct...which after coming to the end of morning act, I sort of told her....remember what is today?
Before service, we chatted more about my family...how things are....finance, everything...housing and stuff.... also my preference in Mos burger....fries and milk tea...rarely burger....only she can get me to eat mos burger willingly.....there is only 1 occasion that I can remember because everyone is eating mos burger ...that I had to force myself to eat there too...
After service, she wanted to get lozenges for her mum but to no avail....then we just went back...she lay her head....I was wearing something thin with my usual windbreaker.... we walked back....finish up the 2 day old desert by my mum.... we hugged.... K on her forehead.... as there is no time....no energy left.... I allow her to sit on my lap for her to hug me closer..... Well it was just a simple closure for a day of crazy things done and crazy words said....it is indeed a memorable 1 month anniversary with more exciting faithful journey to come.....I included travelling to HK into the list liao
Today....bite her fats off...haha wonder how does that help in slimming down
30 sept 1900-2330~>4.5 hours-> 249 hours
1 oct 0700-2330-> 16.5 hours -> 265.5 hours
02 Oct 1730 - 2200 -> 5.5 hours -> 271 hours
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
Morning Half way 178.5
Non Cure Treatment 207
We still do it with lips- 241
Bra 14th
Together 6.5
U did me 3 times
I did u 1 time
30 Sept.....no cg.... she no need OT.... I went with my colleauge K(different K) for coffee and his rolex bontique shop....he is into watches.... good service....a PRC serve us
Then about 1830 I met K.....at dhoby ghaut....up and down the escalator we find try ....finally....then we went eat jap restuarant .... ichiban.....shared a combo meal and 1 sushi..... don't remember what we chatted....thanks giving, no N to N.....no M to Fore. we walked around...she shopped for her Twin star.....coaxing me to buy for her for whatever occasion... I said no....coz I already got something liao..or in the midst of getting something....too early.... cannot spoil grand plan...ahha....and it is from Japan.... all from japan what.... zzzzz
So we took a long journey back...she was cold.....and she tried to hug me.....awkward position...then she is doing everything she can to warm herself up....then carousing my arm and hand quite often..... I was quite sensitive somehow and it is building up.... until we change to Tanah Merah ...then back to her home...... no hell went loose though.....it was about 2230....then 2330... can't really remember what we did....other than reading the word.... then hugging and that is..... nothing too much.... somehow the linger feeling from the bus journey stays on...or stood on.... so after I go back, I told her we should go round 2....haha....
1 Oct...woke up 4am and to leave on 0530....surprising I reach her place 0640....then I told her....round 2 ok I even message her to lock the doors too... ops...so obvious.......kiss her on the forehead.....and then everything went through....N to N......we hugged....and then yup..... she was in the whole experience..... we miscomm on some signally....ops...didnt know the different between just slip under and reduce one layer.... haha....well M to body.. M to tummy....to neck and otheres..... really H to G.......she even ask me to help her.....so direct but ok I obliged....the position was awkward she lay down... i sit up right....we talked later as she wanted me to lay down ...but I find it awkward too. then M to B.........and I finish it by about 0733...with alarm preset.....so later with 7 more minutes, I lay onto her bed.... have her on me....and let her do what she want to do la.... I just want to get some sleep later while she can prepare herself.....she also moved a bit...but I smack her butt....saying the pre-agreed is no G to G or Hp.... so with little time, she went to prepared...she mentioned she wanted to return the favor but there is just not enough time.....
Met my good buddy.... Bchiny....he has his second breakfast.....we chatted.....talk about year end trip.... coming wednesday booking it liao.... at the usual mac place near his place....
then we took luggage back home, lunch at subway, shared subway melt...started my finance control.
At her place...nothing happened.... but I somewhat said something that trigger her to cry....ok...then we already decided we want to discuss somethings....so we went airport, drank starbucks.....chatting on communication and more things...although initially wanted to talked about physical intimacy....well God has his way...the sermon was powerful....no more excuse...excuse vs reasons.....This is 1 oct...which after coming to the end of morning act, I sort of told her....remember what is today?
Before service, we chatted more about my family...how things are....finance, everything...housing and stuff.... also my preference in Mos burger....fries and milk tea...rarely burger....only she can get me to eat mos burger willingly.....there is only 1 occasion that I can remember because everyone is eating mos burger ...that I had to force myself to eat there too...
After service, she wanted to get lozenges for her mum but to no avail....then we just went back...she lay her head....I was wearing something thin with my usual windbreaker.... we walked back....finish up the 2 day old desert by my mum.... we hugged.... K on her forehead.... as there is no time....no energy left.... I allow her to sit on my lap for her to hug me closer..... Well it was just a simple closure for a day of crazy things done and crazy words said....it is indeed a memorable 1 month anniversary with more exciting faithful journey to come.....I included travelling to HK into the list liao
Today....bite her fats off...haha wonder how does that help in slimming down
Wednesday, September 28, 2016
24 Hana 1st birthday 25 JB full day of build up to still doing it
23 Sept 1900 - 2330 -> 4.5 hours -> 212.5 hours
24 sept 1000-2330 ->13.5 hours -> 226 hours
25 sept 0730-2330 -> 16hours -> 242 hours
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
Morning Half way 178.5
Non Cure Treatment 207
We still do it with lips- 241
Bra 13th
Together 6.5
U did me 3 times
24 Hana Birthday - about 10 at her place.... Went to her home. Waited for a while..... then went to V Hotel. We are the youngest non married pair...the rest are married with kids..... some mother came with kid. we still N to N a bit.... church service.... great word...... reach her home at 2300.... I wonder how long had I spent in her room with her since..... as I type this....
Type history: Or I stay over to finish up your need :)
We did move a little unfinished as she sat on my lap N to N with occasional Lip touch..... exploring but time is limited....15 minutes.... only.... That I think may have set the stage for tomorrow.... Unfinished business. - The prolonged N to N which was significant until the position/height is awkward...she is on the bed, me on the chair.
25 JB trip....woke up at 0530.....went her place 0700....0720 then enter....a small miscom which test patient.... I was like ok....perhaps I just go downstairs to start my work.
Ya still on my bed Zz sleepy
Ok... I am just a few stops away from your home... Yeah I get to see you in sleeping clothes haha
So u want me to wait in your place or downstairs?
U decide
M: I at door step
M: Erm I have no keys lol
K: Coming sorry
M: Thanks... I almost wanted to go downstairs and perhaps work there
N to N
1. at checkpoint
2. at the lift area
3. along the walkway (in cinema) when outside cinema
4. Out of sight along the exit
5. outside near the glass area until another cinema exit
plus more short ones.... up to 10 +
shared 2 meals together, take some we-fie together.... Then we went back..... although we did what is supposed to be clean activity...... no clean sheet is sufficient. When it starts..... it does not stop...... even after saying we are not going to do anything after she bathed.....
Trigger is just need to sit on lap,..... I remember I was in the I desire it mood liao. Then the escalation is N to N with really more sustained L to L ...light one.... then off go the usual B. Then longer and longer N to N with others..... L to F...... the moment is when it is front to front.... even on the seat..... with H to T. And near the V. Even before the usual B is off.......once we changed location..... that is where all things break loose..... the key thing is even though I am not into the mood, the mind just didn't want to stop..... A choice still remains but the choice is not made..... but somehow nothing is stop......once the bed after usual B is off...... All it like the mind is going for it..... no obstacle to stop.... mind is just flowing into it. No where to stop the flow of thoughts of what to do next....
So once one the bed..... then once on the floor..... after the flood one, my emotion/ S- is used up...... I just lay down there ....want to cool down and take a rest..... she ask if I want it..... I didn't reply..... then by don't know what reason, I place her hand after she tried to initiate..... near my G....... then she just self service and continue..... till now I couldn't remember.... I got a feeling that I just fall asleep for that 1 -2 minutes... or my body just completely numb or void of sensation ..... when I regain consciousness.... I know I was completely zipped up...... I understand from checking with her that I actually snored.
Ok this really warrants concern....and Thank God to allow things to flow without incident.... Especially after the word. Love offers Grace
Truth wrapped in love hurts, he never breaks anyone's trust.
Love always makes a way for healing
God offer his grace, embrace and freely share with others.
Follow up action:
Less time spend in her room. I may have to remove my privilege to help remove her usual B.
N to N may be another consideration....
Together we will talk and work it together..... both sentimental are the same....PTL... This week likely to meet for CG ...or perhaps on thurday if she OT and I finished my work too. Saturday thank God it is church service as usual. 1 Oct....
So period comes..... whichever ba.... God just guard us... and protect us... May your Grace be sufficient for all. Your love that offer grace.
24 sept 1000-2330 ->13.5 hours -> 226 hours
25 sept 0730-2330 -> 16hours -> 242 hours
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
Morning Half way 178.5
Non Cure Treatment 207
We still do it with lips- 241
Bra 13th
Together 6.5
U did me 3 times
24 Hana Birthday - about 10 at her place.... Went to her home. Waited for a while..... then went to V Hotel. We are the youngest non married pair...the rest are married with kids..... some mother came with kid. we still N to N a bit.... church service.... great word...... reach her home at 2300.... I wonder how long had I spent in her room with her since..... as I type this....
Type history: Or I stay over to finish up your need :)
We did move a little unfinished as she sat on my lap N to N with occasional Lip touch..... exploring but time is limited....15 minutes.... only.... That I think may have set the stage for tomorrow.... Unfinished business. - The prolonged N to N which was significant until the position/height is awkward...she is on the bed, me on the chair.
25 JB trip....woke up at 0530.....went her place 0700....0720 then enter....a small miscom which test patient.... I was like ok....perhaps I just go downstairs to start my work.
Ya still on my bed Zz sleepy
Ok... I am just a few stops away from your home... Yeah I get to see you in sleeping clothes haha
So u want me to wait in your place or downstairs?
U decide
M: I at door step
M: Erm I have no keys lol
K: Coming sorry
M: Thanks... I almost wanted to go downstairs and perhaps work there
N to N
1. at checkpoint
2. at the lift area
3. along the walkway (in cinema) when outside cinema
4. Out of sight along the exit
5. outside near the glass area until another cinema exit
plus more short ones.... up to 10 +
shared 2 meals together, take some we-fie together.... Then we went back..... although we did what is supposed to be clean activity...... no clean sheet is sufficient. When it starts..... it does not stop...... even after saying we are not going to do anything after she bathed.....
Trigger is just need to sit on lap,..... I remember I was in the I desire it mood liao. Then the escalation is N to N with really more sustained L to L ...light one.... then off go the usual B. Then longer and longer N to N with others..... L to F...... the moment is when it is front to front.... even on the seat..... with H to T. And near the V. Even before the usual B is off.......once we changed location..... that is where all things break loose..... the key thing is even though I am not into the mood, the mind just didn't want to stop..... A choice still remains but the choice is not made..... but somehow nothing is stop......once the bed after usual B is off...... All it like the mind is going for it..... no obstacle to stop.... mind is just flowing into it. No where to stop the flow of thoughts of what to do next....
So once one the bed..... then once on the floor..... after the flood one, my emotion/ S- is used up...... I just lay down there ....want to cool down and take a rest..... she ask if I want it..... I didn't reply..... then by don't know what reason, I place her hand after she tried to initiate..... near my G....... then she just self service and continue..... till now I couldn't remember.... I got a feeling that I just fall asleep for that 1 -2 minutes... or my body just completely numb or void of sensation ..... when I regain consciousness.... I know I was completely zipped up...... I understand from checking with her that I actually snored.
Ok this really warrants concern....and Thank God to allow things to flow without incident.... Especially after the word. Love offers Grace
Truth wrapped in love hurts, he never breaks anyone's trust.
Love always makes a way for healing
God offer his grace, embrace and freely share with others.
Follow up action:
Less time spend in her room. I may have to remove my privilege to help remove her usual B.
N to N may be another consideration....
Together we will talk and work it together..... both sentimental are the same....PTL... This week likely to meet for CG ...or perhaps on thurday if she OT and I finished my work too. Saturday thank God it is church service as usual. 1 Oct....
So period comes..... whichever ba.... God just guard us... and protect us... May your Grace be sufficient for all. Your love that offer grace.
Thursday, September 22, 2016
18 Sept - Went over for dinner after a day of work 19 Sept cousin outing 21 Sept non cure treatment
17 Sept 2016 - 0000 - 1130 => 11 hours -> 181.5 hours
1400 - 2330 => 9.5 hours -> 193.5 hours
18 Sept 1830-2330 -> 5 Hours -> 198.5 hours
19 Sept 1830-2330 -> 5 hours -> 203.5 hours
21 Sept 1900 - 2330 -> 4.5 hours - > 208 hours
23 Sept 1900 - 2330 -> 4.5 hours -> 212.5 hours
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
Morning Half way 178.5
Non Cure Treatment 207
18 Sept
Morning disagreement
Then I work, trying to finished up my work ....managed 1 out of 2 task..... then went out to find her to eat porridge dinner.
Then we did the Word. Did just like any couple did....walk around chit chat..... exploring......all the stairs...but we just didn't do anything.... Enjoy each other presence
Then I went home. After routine at her place...... 8?
19 Sept
Out with cousin.....meet her half way to Potong Pasir MRT. She wore the same dress as she wore on the blind date.
Simple nice dinner.... my youngest cousin got lost....almost got her to pay.....she also almost become pek chek - wanted to go home
K asking my cousin who I am. My cousins all share I believe..... Then I get to use about most of the $400 initial for my Maybank card.
Went back .....routine at her place 9?
21 Sept
She wanted to do manicure/pedicure.... I suggested bishan.....she came over while I try to finish my work
I obliged to her request to eat mos burger. Then we walked around...... for a while....then we leave early..... 2130....to reach her home about 2230......
Then it all started.....2230 is 207th hour...... so I did my routine......then she hug tightly......as it is still early, so allow her to hug longer.....then she said need to take a sit.......then she sat on my lap..... my mind is already off the mood.......then we did more N to N, N to F.... my hands are just fixed a location....refusing to do much.....then she guided my hand to her back..... ...as she sat on my lap..... I put my hand in front of my G.... to protect....but she seems into the mood......anything near.....she can just start..... I find it hard to believe....but she just start.....so somewhat I know nothing is going to stop her.....so i offer my hand.....she rock to my hand......not just once but 2 rounds.........as I think back....what is the need to do so? What is she using to overcome? Yup before that there were some hint about park and carpark....but how does that lead to it..... I maybe hinting but I have no intention..... after her 2 rounds.... in which at some point i just wanted to lay down...... I did that after 2 rounds.... just want to rest....at the corner of my mind think what will she do? ride on me? or others..... she started to move her hand around me..... just focusing on the back.....then after I lay down.....to rest and relax....not expecting anything....she self-help herself to G..... without asking she just did it.... and best part is I didn't stop her..... I also don't know at this moment why I didn't stop her. Only time was the limiting factor....it was about 5-7 minutes......simple slow stroke.... This is the 2nd time she did this to me..... this time she self-serve....she said I have tears in my eyes..... which I don't know why....but guess I was really stunned, shocked or just unexpressive on what happened. I shared with her abit..... It just leave me not sure..... and why this still continues..... I suspect there is a deeper thing....but now I am not stopping.....May God grace reign and be sufficient.....let it not led to a dark journey... I don't deny I may have prayed for it..... or joked about it....But God your grace is more than that.....there is a greater purpose that physical satisfaction. May Your will be done...May your healing start in her life.
1400 - 2330 => 9.5 hours -> 193.5 hours
18 Sept 1830-2330 -> 5 Hours -> 198.5 hours
19 Sept 1830-2330 -> 5 hours -> 203.5 hours
21 Sept 1900 - 2330 -> 4.5 hours - > 208 hours
23 Sept 1900 - 2330 -> 4.5 hours -> 212.5 hours
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
Morning Half way 178.5
Non Cure Treatment 207
18 Sept
Morning disagreement
Then I work, trying to finished up my work ....managed 1 out of 2 task..... then went out to find her to eat porridge dinner.
Then we did the Word. Did just like any couple did....walk around chit chat..... exploring......all the stairs...but we just didn't do anything.... Enjoy each other presence
Then I went home. After routine at her place...... 8?
19 Sept
Out with cousin.....meet her half way to Potong Pasir MRT. She wore the same dress as she wore on the blind date.
Simple nice dinner.... my youngest cousin got lost....almost got her to pay.....she also almost become pek chek - wanted to go home
K asking my cousin who I am. My cousins all share I believe..... Then I get to use about most of the $400 initial for my Maybank card.
Went back .....routine at her place 9?
21 Sept
She wanted to do manicure/pedicure.... I suggested bishan.....she came over while I try to finish my work
I obliged to her request to eat mos burger. Then we walked around...... for a while....then we leave early..... 2130....to reach her home about 2230......
Then it all started.....2230 is 207th hour...... so I did my routine......then she hug tightly......as it is still early, so allow her to hug longer.....then she said need to take a sit.......then she sat on my lap..... my mind is already off the mood.......then we did more N to N, N to F.... my hands are just fixed a location....refusing to do much.....then she guided my hand to her back..... ...as she sat on my lap..... I put my hand in front of my G.... to protect....but she seems into the mood......anything near.....she can just start..... I find it hard to believe....but she just start.....so somewhat I know nothing is going to stop her.....so i offer my hand.....she rock to my hand......not just once but 2 rounds.........as I think back....what is the need to do so? What is she using to overcome? Yup before that there were some hint about park and carpark....but how does that lead to it..... I maybe hinting but I have no intention..... after her 2 rounds.... in which at some point i just wanted to lay down...... I did that after 2 rounds.... just want to rest....at the corner of my mind think what will she do? ride on me? or others..... she started to move her hand around me..... just focusing on the back.....then after I lay down.....to rest and relax....not expecting anything....she self-help herself to G..... without asking she just did it.... and best part is I didn't stop her..... I also don't know at this moment why I didn't stop her. Only time was the limiting factor....it was about 5-7 minutes......simple slow stroke.... This is the 2nd time she did this to me..... this time she self-serve....she said I have tears in my eyes..... which I don't know why....but guess I was really stunned, shocked or just unexpressive on what happened. I shared with her abit..... It just leave me not sure..... and why this still continues..... I suspect there is a deeper thing....but now I am not stopping.....May God grace reign and be sufficient.....let it not led to a dark journey... I don't deny I may have prayed for it..... or joked about it....But God your grace is more than that.....there is a greater purpose that physical satisfaction. May Your will be done...May your healing start in her life.
16 Sept F1 race and all the build up......I learnt more that what I expect.... 17 Sept is meeting her close GF
16 Sept 2016 - 1730 - 0000 => 7.5 hours -> 170 hours
17 Sept 2016 - 0000 - 1130 => 11 hours -> 181.5 hours
1400 - 2330 => 9.5 hours -> 191 hours
Thursday didn't meet for lunch and dinner.....though thru chat she said, if I want, she will give......omg lol
It is a nice experience at F1 pit on 15 Sept..... how I wish she can be there. took some photos to send her.... It is a nice experience. Nice toilet compare to on Friday. Thank God my colleague drove me back....or nearby. Looking forward for 16 Sept
16 Sept work work work
Enjoy ourselves
KFC fast food
Eat Melon ice cream.
Drank Coffee Bean together Black forest with cherry
Watch the car zooming past together.
Taking photos together
Enjoying each other company
can't remember what we chatted.... causal chat nothing too serious. Really being a couple
Point out of the various car. The different color car.... the sky line, the F1 cars on MBS. The multi color merlion.
Then we walk and took photo at fullerton... found some nice place ...the mirror underpass is also quiet and good.Erm erm..... for MOut
So we took train back, not really at the concert....as she lean against my lap....looking at MBS....enjoying the ice cream
So when we back in Pasir ris....time to get a drink....then ask her if she wants to stay at Mac or go somewhere else....she say she would follow me.... So since I already hinted her before hand, I brought her to the place which we had our second round....
I think it started of with sitting on the lap... N to N, then tip of M to M...... then she started with M to N and H to B. Same goes for me.... for her.
To my surprise as much I am not in the mood, my mind is blank with some thoughts, I actually went close to M to B.......then first round...... yup simple and of a sustain length..... she is totally into it.....
the M to B continues after I help her with her top..... then...back to M to B, N to N...... I think it is only 2 rounds......thus the 2nd round I went H to G. or Close to it. I can't really see her reaction....but I know I didn't want to go too far.....neither do I want to take those out.... just to heighten her sensation..... so that she is enjoying it
So second or third round..... then she continues to hug me as she cools down.....
Then after all I told her i am going to release my guard....and allow myself to sink into it.....sink into the mood.....and she just auto pilot...... H to B, ...... I thought she would dig into the same places..... I just encourage her to go bolder.....though I was prepared mentally for almost all the way.... well what goes after really builds me up..... H to BB....... she just slowly and I allow my body to go into .... I really enjoy the sensation around my body....not just a part of my body. I shiver/vibrate once...and that put me a little off guard....woah....She is driving me up..... not long after my first shiver......she did something I didn't expect she would do at that stage.... as I look back I think she just followed me.
H to G ......and there she goes with a bit of my assistance.... I thought only perhaps on the outside....but she dig deeper .....she is the first who did such a thing to me....my very first....she did it for a while......until my mind was totally out of the mood..... My mind just went autopilot and cut off all sensation....and I also don't want to do too much clean up.... so I told her....yup.... I have enough....told her that we should not do this again like that.... and told her she surprised me...and asked her where she learnt this from.....and I connected the dots.....from the 1st .....and why lead to the second....... I see the build up to why she will do it for the second...... nothing happens without a seed somewhere....
Woah....this is just common but sadly this is how it is..... thus I just asked a few more question for information..... and that concludes that night.....from just a cup of green tea....yup we were really overtimed.....we went back at 3-4 am......and there are no more tension or things rise up....for the night...as both of us are just tired....and need to wake up in 2 -3 hours time... I slept soundly at her bed while she sleeps with her mum.
The next morning is also another shocking....she in her t-shirt dress...... and I just made on her......letting her feel it..... my mind wasn't awake yet...my body just reacting......and that moment things happen quite fast.....even she is reluctant ......after a door open....we compose ourselves later....and that is how we started 17 sept instead..... I know my hands are right spot then....and we went thru a few motions....ops.... woah that was just too spontaneous.
This sums up to be
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
4.5 times.... as I type this...... there is 5.5 times already..... omg.....
17 Sept
Joking about having beer....don't know what will happen....no beer...
passed the 1st stage...2nd stage is to drink 1/2 pint beer....
Talk about my story.... the journey chit chat with them. Have a very nice atas tea....
Sharing life experience and focus on Cheryl? one of the single of her GF
Service was a struggle to keep away..... then the usual routine according to 22 Sept 2016 - 7th time?
17 Sept 2016 - 0000 - 1130 => 11 hours -> 181.5 hours
1400 - 2330 => 9.5 hours -> 191 hours
Thursday didn't meet for lunch and dinner.....though thru chat she said, if I want, she will give......omg lol
It is a nice experience at F1 pit on 15 Sept..... how I wish she can be there. took some photos to send her.... It is a nice experience. Nice toilet compare to on Friday. Thank God my colleague drove me back....or nearby. Looking forward for 16 Sept
16 Sept work work work
Enjoy ourselves
KFC fast food
Eat Melon ice cream.
Drank Coffee Bean together Black forest with cherry
Watch the car zooming past together.
Taking photos together
Enjoying each other company
can't remember what we chatted.... causal chat nothing too serious. Really being a couple
Point out of the various car. The different color car.... the sky line, the F1 cars on MBS. The multi color merlion.
Then we walk and took photo at fullerton... found some nice place ...the mirror underpass is also quiet and good.Erm erm..... for MOut
So we took train back, not really at the concert....as she lean against my lap....looking at MBS....enjoying the ice cream
So when we back in Pasir ris....time to get a drink....then ask her if she wants to stay at Mac or go somewhere else....she say she would follow me.... So since I already hinted her before hand, I brought her to the place which we had our second round....
I think it started of with sitting on the lap... N to N, then tip of M to M...... then she started with M to N and H to B. Same goes for me.... for her.
To my surprise as much I am not in the mood, my mind is blank with some thoughts, I actually went close to M to B.......then first round...... yup simple and of a sustain length..... she is totally into it.....
the M to B continues after I help her with her top..... then...back to M to B, N to N...... I think it is only 2 rounds......thus the 2nd round I went H to G. or Close to it. I can't really see her reaction....but I know I didn't want to go too far.....neither do I want to take those out.... just to heighten her sensation..... so that she is enjoying it
So second or third round..... then she continues to hug me as she cools down.....
Then after all I told her i am going to release my guard....and allow myself to sink into it.....sink into the mood.....and she just auto pilot...... H to B, ...... I thought she would dig into the same places..... I just encourage her to go bolder.....though I was prepared mentally for almost all the way.... well what goes after really builds me up..... H to BB....... she just slowly and I allow my body to go into .... I really enjoy the sensation around my body....not just a part of my body. I shiver/vibrate once...and that put me a little off guard....woah....She is driving me up..... not long after my first shiver......she did something I didn't expect she would do at that stage.... as I look back I think she just followed me.
H to G ......and there she goes with a bit of my assistance.... I thought only perhaps on the outside....but she dig deeper .....she is the first who did such a thing to me....my very first....she did it for a while......until my mind was totally out of the mood..... My mind just went autopilot and cut off all sensation....and I also don't want to do too much clean up.... so I told her....yup.... I have enough....told her that we should not do this again like that.... and told her she surprised me...and asked her where she learnt this from.....and I connected the dots.....from the 1st .....and why lead to the second....... I see the build up to why she will do it for the second...... nothing happens without a seed somewhere....
Woah....this is just common but sadly this is how it is..... thus I just asked a few more question for information..... and that concludes that night.....from just a cup of green tea....yup we were really overtimed.....we went back at 3-4 am......and there are no more tension or things rise up....for the night...as both of us are just tired....and need to wake up in 2 -3 hours time... I slept soundly at her bed while she sleeps with her mum.
The next morning is also another shocking....she in her t-shirt dress...... and I just made on her......letting her feel it..... my mind wasn't awake yet...my body just reacting......and that moment things happen quite fast.....even she is reluctant ......after a door open....we compose ourselves later....and that is how we started 17 sept instead..... I know my hands are right spot then....and we went thru a few motions....ops.... woah that was just too spontaneous.
This sums up to be
Blk 183 120th
Lake 154.5
Carpark 160.5
First Hut 171st
4.5 times.... as I type this...... there is 5.5 times already..... omg.....
17 Sept
Joking about having beer....don't know what will happen....no beer...
passed the 1st stage...2nd stage is to drink 1/2 pint beer....
Talk about my story.... the journey chit chat with them. Have a very nice atas tea....
Sharing life experience and focus on Cheryl? one of the single of her GF
Service was a struggle to keep away..... then the usual routine according to 22 Sept 2016 - 7th time?
13 Sept I meet my friend and received a message 14 Sept K and I talked
12 Sept 2016 - 1500 - 2330 => 8.5 hours => 156.5 hours
14 Sept 2016 - 1 hour lunch + 1830 - 2330 = 6 hours => 162.5 hours
16 Sept 2016 - 1730 - 0000 => 7.5 hours -> 170 hours
17 Sept 2016 - 0000 - 1130 => 11 hours -> 181.5 hours
1400 - 2330 => 9.5 hours -> 191 hours
Again: 160.5 hours
13 Sept didn't meet K lunch. Then dinner Finally meet Sharon, Day was effective in some ways.
Lunch with Smoky.... with her as she politely asked if she mind I join her....sooo sweet and kind of her. 2 times.....and she has her own lunch.....already and she still don't mind joining me for lunch. Chatted and talk....she shared her life, and how her date is.....well I shared abit of mine.... mostly hearing her out.
Evening, dinner was quick and good....Japanese food. talked about life, work, biyang, then as we proceed to a place where Mandarin Gallery, Artique Café
Then chat .....K message she feel jealous...so I told Sharon Chia, I need to attend to this first....
I learnt: Destiny. Support group, Otter sleep, PT on a intimate level beyond marriage.
I was concerned and shared with K about things.... on the next day 14 Sept. We pray through the phone and talked about something....
14 Sept.... I told her that for lunch, lets spend time together in love.....just really as a couple.... nothing else..... enjoying each other and showering each other with TLC..... let the evening be the evening. It rained still and she grab me close to her heart..... But it was nice
Evening comes...... I napped in the afternoon in prep...didn't do much but the time arrives...... I used about 5-10 minutes to prepare...... Negative emotion and its impact.
1. What are negative emotion
2. How does Negative emotion affects our lives
3. Our reaction / responds to negative emotions
4. Factor of consideration and the reason why it is a concern.
So on myside, aloof, disappointed, upset, jealous, self-critical.
Reactions: Sin more, Can't be bother mode, do more harm to self and to others, being extreme.
Affect our lives - we doubt, we argue, we can't love each other purely, we spilt up, we just do the things we agree not to
Factor of consideration - one major one for me negative emotion => creation of desire for love via PT - > with the right amount of arousal, lead to G to G, then hurt or guilt that hurt me....and I don't know how I will respond to it......
Thus as I thought of it, I am prepared of the possibility too...I thank God.... I know I will keep to the commitment and the promise told to her..... just that there is another issue to clear
So we finish 2130...... we walked back.....she lay her head on my shoulder..... then we start to escalate a little..... I told her as we walked what I appreciate her....one which I like at time girls to take the lead..... so as we were not be able to interact with people around..... I know in my heart I sense it....she also ....then she told me let walk around.... I told her you lead the way....so we walked.....and she brought up the car park...as I approached the carpark.... I already sense it....and I just prayed in tongues..... in preparation for what is to come..... so yup we walked all the way to the top...... found a place out of sight near the lift...... and we started...... I asked permission as usual..... and she just take it off. It is more difficult but yup a least a few moments for her to release.....until time does not allow....and she feel like why is she the one who wants it..I told her....it is ok....coz I already know I am at stage 8 unconditional love.....stage 7 is just one type of expression.....when stage 8, whether stage 7 exist or don't have it is fine with me..... I desire and yearn but I can live without it. I assure her.... with just 15 minutes... one last round for her.....sooo near her place....I told her I will find the place ....I lead then since she is not satisfied.... after that I ask does she wants more....she said enough already..... due to time ..... I am glad to hear that....that I allow her to release those desires....safely....
I went back to my home.....the moment my undies were off..... I felt soooooo weak and desire....just like the day before.....she just message....quick shower and get dress up.....immediately the weak feeling left me...... and I could just shower quickly and go and sleep....Thank God for everything and Praise the Lord...... this is really accelerated preparation for Marriage lol
14 Sept 2016 - 1 hour lunch + 1830 - 2330 = 6 hours => 162.5 hours
16 Sept 2016 - 1730 - 0000 => 7.5 hours -> 170 hours
17 Sept 2016 - 0000 - 1130 => 11 hours -> 181.5 hours
1400 - 2330 => 9.5 hours -> 191 hours
Again: 160.5 hours
13 Sept didn't meet K lunch. Then dinner Finally meet Sharon, Day was effective in some ways.
Lunch with Smoky.... with her as she politely asked if she mind I join her....sooo sweet and kind of her. 2 times.....and she has her own lunch.....already and she still don't mind joining me for lunch. Chatted and talk....she shared her life, and how her date is.....well I shared abit of mine.... mostly hearing her out.
Evening, dinner was quick and good....Japanese food. talked about life, work, biyang, then as we proceed to a place where Mandarin Gallery, Artique Café
Then chat .....K message she feel jealous...so I told Sharon Chia, I need to attend to this first....
I learnt: Destiny. Support group, Otter sleep, PT on a intimate level beyond marriage.
I was concerned and shared with K about things.... on the next day 14 Sept. We pray through the phone and talked about something....
14 Sept.... I told her that for lunch, lets spend time together in love.....just really as a couple.... nothing else..... enjoying each other and showering each other with TLC..... let the evening be the evening. It rained still and she grab me close to her heart..... But it was nice
Evening comes...... I napped in the afternoon in prep...didn't do much but the time arrives...... I used about 5-10 minutes to prepare...... Negative emotion and its impact.
1. What are negative emotion
2. How does Negative emotion affects our lives
3. Our reaction / responds to negative emotions
4. Factor of consideration and the reason why it is a concern.
So on myside, aloof, disappointed, upset, jealous, self-critical.
Reactions: Sin more, Can't be bother mode, do more harm to self and to others, being extreme.
Affect our lives - we doubt, we argue, we can't love each other purely, we spilt up, we just do the things we agree not to
Factor of consideration - one major one for me negative emotion => creation of desire for love via PT - > with the right amount of arousal, lead to G to G, then hurt or guilt that hurt me....and I don't know how I will respond to it......
Thus as I thought of it, I am prepared of the possibility too...I thank God.... I know I will keep to the commitment and the promise told to her..... just that there is another issue to clear
So we finish 2130...... we walked back.....she lay her head on my shoulder..... then we start to escalate a little..... I told her as we walked what I appreciate her....one which I like at time girls to take the lead..... so as we were not be able to interact with people around..... I know in my heart I sense it....she also ....then she told me let walk around.... I told her you lead the way....so we walked.....and she brought up the car park...as I approached the carpark.... I already sense it....and I just prayed in tongues..... in preparation for what is to come..... so yup we walked all the way to the top...... found a place out of sight near the lift...... and we started...... I asked permission as usual..... and she just take it off. It is more difficult but yup a least a few moments for her to release.....until time does not allow....and she feel like why is she the one who wants it..I told her....it is ok....coz I already know I am at stage 8 unconditional love.....stage 7 is just one type of expression.....when stage 8, whether stage 7 exist or don't have it is fine with me..... I desire and yearn but I can live without it. I assure her.... with just 15 minutes... one last round for her.....sooo near her place....I told her I will find the place ....I lead then since she is not satisfied.... after that I ask does she wants more....she said enough already..... due to time ..... I am glad to hear that....that I allow her to release those desires....safely....
I went back to my home.....the moment my undies were off..... I felt soooooo weak and desire....just like the day before.....she just message....quick shower and get dress up.....immediately the weak feeling left me...... and I could just shower quickly and go and sleep....Thank God for everything and Praise the Lord...... this is really accelerated preparation for Marriage lol
Wednesday, September 14, 2016
12 Sept 2016 - I meet friend. Meet parents dinner session formally, blueberry session at the park
11 Sept 2016 1200 - 2330 => 16.5 hours => 148 hours
12 Sept 2016 - 1500 - 2330 => 8.5 hours => 156.5 hours
meet parents 1830 - 151.5 hours
Again - 2130 - 154.5 hours
Talking in the morning....mum ask serious question..... I say got to meet her parents first.
Then we are all just joking about last night..... saying perhaps 3 girls and 5 boys...haha
Just a happy time together as a family finally without any worries and things.
Meet a friend....chit chat....chat about the whole process of my dating from day 1 until the day which the official start - 19th day consider 1st day on 14 August. then the whole process. then K came. They chatted and chatted abit...
Then dinner was simple. simple interaction..... simple family time. Then my mum held her hands.... and things are ok
Then off we went for pasir ris.... went to the same place....the usual place was occupied...we went to a more open hut....we went into the mood....N to N..... but I wanted to finish the blueberry.....we feeded each other.....lip to the fingers.....I believe we know we are into it...
After blueberry, I set aside the things....take out my glasses....in prep......and there we look at each other.... and we started. N to N, hugging each other. Slowly our hands move a bit more...... with permission down to bottoms..... she sat on my lap.... I can feel the tension..... and I was a little into the mood... then there she massage my back....i could feel myself build up.... i am really into it slowly...10-25%.....then she place her hands into my bottoms.....that was sensational......but it triggered my body alarm..... trigger my mind too...... then she kissed me from cheek to neck.....that is the point that my mind started to take over.... I some how know I am no longer into the mood...but I know she is into the mood. So I just follow along......help her...to rise up....with permission along the way.
Another moment - took her clips off.....rise it up.....then arouse her back......then excuse is to feel her heartbeat.....yup with permission did the cupping.... and that is the limit..... not sure how she feels......then I lift her up....with my hands and she is into it all..... not once......but for a sustained time......2 burst of it....as my arms were tired....then one more time that is close contact with my P. In between I wore it back for her..... through it these, I was already out of mood......I was only in it until the point she miss me around.......
hot and sweaty.....times does not allow....so I send her back. N to N...K to forehead.....
The surprise thing or some what not special, I am in that mood in the bus..... I could still feel the sensation of her hands in my B. through the bus journey.....not a portion but for the whole journey.... I was like....have the desire to have it..... but I know I just need to stop thinking or imaging....
So back home..... when I was bathing, after chatting with her...... I can't imagine as I touched my back and stuff.... I was feeling sooooooooo desired and wanting that my body reacts..... I feel my legs weaken..... my body really yearned for it....... that was too dangerous....too close..... only shower and some prayer ...calm me down..... Thank God that He has given me quick way to calm myself..... But that lead to maybe next friday may go into another level...... and today I am concerned..... Friday is just 2 shorts aways.....very easy compare to the previous 2 experience.....oh well......
Feeling still lingers and move on.....well I don't know why still the experience still.... One learning is she is firm on the no.....no take out bottom to experiment.... I am glad that she is firm. It will be tough journey since I know the floodgates are open..... It is really overwhelming for her...and I feel bad now....why did I open the floodgates.......all things have its consequence....so I just trust God since He has journey with me, he will not let me sink too deep or drift too far away.....In trust in Him, I just follow with wisdom and strength and just make sure my limits are strong...and pray that God will not allow such strong emotion to cause more harm in the most unexpected situatiohn
Strong emotion love vs hate => a deed => deep wounds for me...which I did a pre stimulated and I can sense the amount of hurt that may come...
12 Sept 2016 - 1500 - 2330 => 8.5 hours => 156.5 hours
meet parents 1830 - 151.5 hours
Again - 2130 - 154.5 hours
Talking in the morning....mum ask serious question..... I say got to meet her parents first.
Then we are all just joking about last night..... saying perhaps 3 girls and 5 boys...haha
Just a happy time together as a family finally without any worries and things.
Meet a friend....chit chat....chat about the whole process of my dating from day 1 until the day which the official start - 19th day consider 1st day on 14 August. then the whole process. then K came. They chatted and chatted abit...
Then dinner was simple. simple interaction..... simple family time. Then my mum held her hands.... and things are ok
Then off we went for pasir ris.... went to the same place....the usual place was occupied...we went to a more open hut....we went into the mood....N to N..... but I wanted to finish the blueberry.....we feeded each other.....lip to the fingers.....I believe we know we are into it...
After blueberry, I set aside the things....take out my glasses....in prep......and there we look at each other.... and we started. N to N, hugging each other. Slowly our hands move a bit more...... with permission down to bottoms..... she sat on my lap.... I can feel the tension..... and I was a little into the mood... then there she massage my back....i could feel myself build up.... i am really into it slowly...10-25%.....then she place her hands into my bottoms.....that was sensational......but it triggered my body alarm..... trigger my mind too...... then she kissed me from cheek to neck.....that is the point that my mind started to take over.... I some how know I am no longer into the mood...but I know she is into the mood. So I just follow along......help her...to rise up....with permission along the way.
Another moment - took her clips off.....rise it up.....then arouse her back......then excuse is to feel her heartbeat.....yup with permission did the cupping.... and that is the limit..... not sure how she feels......then I lift her up....with my hands and she is into it all..... not once......but for a sustained time......2 burst of it....as my arms were tired....then one more time that is close contact with my P. In between I wore it back for her..... through it these, I was already out of mood......I was only in it until the point she miss me around.......
hot and sweaty.....times does not allow....so I send her back. N to N...K to forehead.....
The surprise thing or some what not special, I am in that mood in the bus..... I could still feel the sensation of her hands in my B. through the bus journey.....not a portion but for the whole journey.... I was like....have the desire to have it..... but I know I just need to stop thinking or imaging....
So back home..... when I was bathing, after chatting with her...... I can't imagine as I touched my back and stuff.... I was feeling sooooooooo desired and wanting that my body reacts..... I feel my legs weaken..... my body really yearned for it....... that was too dangerous....too close..... only shower and some prayer ...calm me down..... Thank God that He has given me quick way to calm myself..... But that lead to maybe next friday may go into another level...... and today I am concerned..... Friday is just 2 shorts aways.....very easy compare to the previous 2 experience.....oh well......
Feeling still lingers and move on.....well I don't know why still the experience still.... One learning is she is firm on the no.....no take out bottom to experiment.... I am glad that she is firm. It will be tough journey since I know the floodgates are open..... It is really overwhelming for her...and I feel bad now....why did I open the floodgates.......all things have its consequence....so I just trust God since He has journey with me, he will not let me sink too deep or drift too far away.....In trust in Him, I just follow with wisdom and strength and just make sure my limits are strong...and pray that God will not allow such strong emotion to cause more harm in the most unexpected situatiohn
Strong emotion love vs hate => a deed => deep wounds for me...which I did a pre stimulated and I can sense the amount of hurt that may come...
Tuesday, September 13, 2016
09 Sept 2016..... On Leave, our first word, sharing of my childhood places....and an expected turn of events
06 Sept 1 hours lunch, 1830 - 2330 = 5 hours instead.=> 106 hours
08 Sep2016 - 1 hour lunch, 1830 - 2330 = 6 hours => 112 hours
09 sept 2016 - 1000-2330 => 13 hours => 125 hours
Happen at 1800 at 120th hour Reward 1st at 1100 hours 113th hour
she didn't sleep much
reward back.
K on the forehead
my childhood place (renovated) told her all the places that is out of sight.....she detected....and deliver as request with build up - H to H
She came school look for me after my meeting
Breakfast
first word 1330
then late lunch veggie crunch at J8 mac.
I was cold and activated. she took adv to tickle me....
Walked to my sec place point block 183
went all the way up...... hug close H to H can't remember how it started.... from shoulder then.....it started...
I can feel the movement.....up and down....though after I am in control.... in 2 different places at the same location..... the 2nd being longer.
at moment stop due to lift... then we continued.....to point ask...so until she can't control or stop there after a while already.... then ask who is in her mind.... and evaluate with her...at that moment she can't.... but today....she told it is more of a body reaction. And she feel warm. to be discuss on another blog.
08 Sep2016 - 1 hour lunch, 1830 - 2330 = 6 hours => 112 hours
09 sept 2016 - 1000-2330 => 13 hours => 125 hours
Happen at 1800 at 120th hour Reward 1st at 1100 hours 113th hour
she didn't sleep much
reward back.
K on the forehead
my childhood place (renovated) told her all the places that is out of sight.....she detected....and deliver as request with build up - H to H
She came school look for me after my meeting
Breakfast
first word 1330
then late lunch veggie crunch at J8 mac.
I was cold and activated. she took adv to tickle me....
Walked to my sec place point block 183
went all the way up...... hug close H to H can't remember how it started.... from shoulder then.....it started...
I can feel the movement.....up and down....though after I am in control.... in 2 different places at the same location..... the 2nd being longer.
at moment stop due to lift... then we continued.....to point ask...so until she can't control or stop there after a while already.... then ask who is in her mind.... and evaluate with her...at that moment she can't.... but today....she told it is more of a body reaction. And she feel warm. to be discuss on another blog.
11 Sept - JB day....and meeting of parents unexpected
11 Sept 2016 1200 - 2330 => 16.5 hours => 148 hours
12 Sept 2016 - 1500 - 2330 => 8.5 hours => 156.5 hours
Met her place......sat at void deck...thinking how she will come look for me.... will she jump on me on my lap...haha.
Well we walk to WS ...have our shared breakfast...... for a budget meal....no big breakfast. she can have most of the harshbrown. I drank 3 cups of my milk tea..... and we chatted chatted and chatted....we just chatted....talk about yesterday night 13 minutes eye interaction....how our body reacts and almost there.....
Day started with Mac breakfast....and then we really interact with each other. all aspect....chit chat...sharing.... we had to wait for 2 hours at the custom until she really tired....so we just interact.....I was have the idea...perhaps we have eye interaction for 2 hours...haha....don't know how far we will go....
in the midst, I owe her 2 things: 5 min hug...and a k on the cheek...on my cheek.... opps...in the end....we went past checkpoint.... I told her....lets go see the "less people" walk that place..... see what is new the other area ...then I told her.....here no one can see....no one will walk pass..... haha....finally she got the hint..... she kissed me...haha although after that I thought I was suppose to give her instead.
Anyway we queue for 2 hours....went to get something for her mum we walked around... then we went back to the same place, just a different angle and slightly different area to take photo.
Just shared our late lunch ......double cheese burger. and orange juice....yum yum.
Then we walked past and I was thinking....how about we go into those lingerie shops...haha...
Then she was showing her bruise on the cheek.....then I just look look look at then swift actions.... k on the spot.
Drink bubble tea. She cough I concerned....buy roti boy is a good choice as we waited a long time. She rest on my shoulder for the whole journey....We even took the wrong side of the train to Kranji and not woodlands. She was cold, I let her wear my jacket.
Reached there... Fish soup her usually, with bee hoon. I asked to eat first....showing concern. She tied a pony tail....woah that melts my heart
Oh ya..... when we were queuing for the bus, we were chatting and slip my mouth to say in relation to marriage .... next year...haha
We did bible study at Mac, messaged my dad to notify him.... didn't prepare my mum will come.... didn't do necessary stuff...... we were slightly just on time then my mum, in cab, smiled...with that smile in the shadow... even I am scared...
So I sent her back....k her on the forehead....
today we going to meet again...I look forward with my parents with K...maybe we can continue after the round 2 hut....I wonder what lay beyond
12 Sept 2016 - 1500 - 2330 => 8.5 hours => 156.5 hours
Met her place......sat at void deck...thinking how she will come look for me.... will she jump on me on my lap...haha.
Well we walk to WS ...have our shared breakfast...... for a budget meal....no big breakfast. she can have most of the harshbrown. I drank 3 cups of my milk tea..... and we chatted chatted and chatted....we just chatted....talk about yesterday night 13 minutes eye interaction....how our body reacts and almost there.....
Day started with Mac breakfast....and then we really interact with each other. all aspect....chit chat...sharing.... we had to wait for 2 hours at the custom until she really tired....so we just interact.....I was have the idea...perhaps we have eye interaction for 2 hours...haha....don't know how far we will go....
in the midst, I owe her 2 things: 5 min hug...and a k on the cheek...on my cheek.... opps...in the end....we went past checkpoint.... I told her....lets go see the "less people" walk that place..... see what is new the other area ...then I told her.....here no one can see....no one will walk pass..... haha....finally she got the hint..... she kissed me...haha although after that I thought I was suppose to give her instead.
Anyway we queue for 2 hours....went to get something for her mum we walked around... then we went back to the same place, just a different angle and slightly different area to take photo.
Just shared our late lunch ......double cheese burger. and orange juice....yum yum.
Then we walked past and I was thinking....how about we go into those lingerie shops...haha...
Then she was showing her bruise on the cheek.....then I just look look look at then swift actions.... k on the spot.
Drink bubble tea. She cough I concerned....buy roti boy is a good choice as we waited a long time. She rest on my shoulder for the whole journey....We even took the wrong side of the train to Kranji and not woodlands. She was cold, I let her wear my jacket.
Reached there... Fish soup her usually, with bee hoon. I asked to eat first....showing concern. She tied a pony tail....woah that melts my heart
Oh ya..... when we were queuing for the bus, we were chatting and slip my mouth to say in relation to marriage .... next year...haha
We did bible study at Mac, messaged my dad to notify him.... didn't prepare my mum will come.... didn't do necessary stuff...... we were slightly just on time then my mum, in cab, smiled...with that smile in the shadow... even I am scared...
So I sent her back....k her on the forehead....
today we going to meet again...I look forward with my parents with K...maybe we can continue after the round 2 hut....I wonder what lay beyond
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