My First 3 positive things of the week? day? Starting with a good friend (Number 18)

1. Relational stability with a low period though, is a good sign as I have other things to handle. Finally found out what is the lapse and need to settle it
2. Attended a good Marketplace talk that is full of God's grace.
3. Manage to finish the term and still asked. Better asked then no ask. Well Life will still go on and life carries on. for the month without Smoky.

My First 3 positive things of the week? day? Starting with a good friend (Number 17)

1. Successful running of othello in school and played a few games. Myself....everything went smoothly ....
2. Healthy recovery and just survive the the final few weeks of the term
3. Survive with no internet at home.....and bursting my data plan...

My First 3 positive things of the week? day? Starting with a good friend (Number 16)

1. Survived a high temperature 12 May 2016 which I had to stagger? myself to the doctor which my temperature measure 39.5
2. I rest for the whole weekend and totally cannot remember what happened throughout the whole week already.
3. No internet for the week, so I just burst my data limit and focus in school. Also managed to find a link to other Mythbuster episode.

She initiated lunch. Today

Today she initiated lunch as I was gearing up for kid year administration. She seems to be low on energy and mood; neither am I in the mood to cheer her up too. Well just being there is what little I can do. No smiling message today... Same clothes, same same.

It is a usual days as she get reckless; not knowing due to what. But soon to find out.

So what is the progress? I am not looking at how progress is but to enjoy the company and be with the person. So let there be a vacuum that only God can fill. Only that your Holy Spirit will call upon her to return to you. What best gift can that be in all grace and mercy.

So let it be  God. Begone to go

Incorherent it may be ba... When is this rational completely?

Smoky ill and I text her. Intuitively I had a thought....

Hot Monday. Realfeel temperature of up to 38°.  Jo wonder I am sweating bb hot yin the mornings. Monday morning. What a way to start the way.

I already got some groceries from yesterday. Though I forgot to bring my straeberries and a still voice led me to getting ice cream plus 2 more freezing cold gel.  Well later today I will need to clear the 2 yogurt that is due today later. Ice cream is what is good for a unexpected hot day.
For a hot lady, as I in midst of invigilation, I should have a thought and I text her. She replied and confirmed my sensing that she is headache and going to take mc for today and tomorrow.

This is my response to her: Get well soon. Take care. Eat well, drink well. Take breather less too.
Was thinking about you and don on me the thought u may not be in school. Was about to look for you when I finish my invigilation.Will you be back tomorrow?

Have to. Too many invigilation to do tomorrow. So trying to get some rest today for Tom.

If not fully rest, just mc tomorrow la...Today I heard quite a number of staff not around too.It's being hot recently. You not fully recover, you will be to hot to handle tomorrow.

Anyway just a concerntext and let tomorrow let it be. In due all, ice cream plus sweet fresher with strawberries. Just a thought for someone. Something to learn and grow.

I still can't find her on tinder though. Which is weird or just difficult to find... Oh well.

My First 3 positive things of the week? day? Starting with a good friend (Number 15)

1. Friday Smoky initiated lunch while also the followup on the AOR processes. She was so hungry she went off to eat first....while I was doing my invigilation duty..... as she talks about how she is being labelled as unopen and not open to suggestion. I can't believe she showed the middle finger lol.... omg...that is the 1st time with the finger.....how many time of F....... oh well.....

2. Saturday a Game buddy and finally tried the really revealing game. It was not a game that is won throughtout the few tries, but it is engaging. It is the first time...and a very nice view ....Also I got my MBS livestyle card from walking over.

3. A week of not too much escalation of any sort. It is smooth sailing without much up and downs as I look back. Other than deadline to meet, things are fine then

She planned lunch though otherwise

Today is a day that is special.....or finally this day comes....it is something too dramatic..... but something that I waited for the whole week. Though initially I though it was just a quickie work only then she will go off for her marking...

"It seems I have invigilation at 11am. Will it be all right if we caught up at about 11:30, settle then go for lunchl"

woah.... though the day before I bought ginger beer thinking of maybe find chance....but she, with work, arranged for lunch.....though I had invigilation till 12 noon. So she told me she left early to eat as she is really hungry.  She was taking pig liver which I noticed and she followed up with the reason coz she needs it .....the period of the month.... oic...

Well I am just glad to have lunch with her and I just steal glance off her....as I eat my standard food.....Western fried rice. So she was telling who is the auntie heng in school, the not open to suggestion and stuff.....the whole organizing process....and she can be quite upfront and fierce.... as i typed, I think i am biased toward her though still objective in it,  She did most of the talking, I just listen as I am the one who is still having food in my mouth..... well, she get her i suspect daily breath. So after listening to it, as I look and be aware of the thing call friend zone and stuff....and reflect about just colleague that I like to work with.... So the question to me is how do I view it?

Does it show the difference between infatuation, lust and love? That is something for me to find out. I look forward for the next one which is next Tuesday. Ginger Beer + yogurt.....  yet to decide what to get for yogurt add-ons.

In anticipation that is one possibility.....she is just feel down....though I can't cheer her up.....in my mind I still think that there is someone in the phone who can cheer her up.

That should conclude for the day..... I enjoy the detour or shelter carpark walk. Enjoy the company, that I admit. Will it progress further than that, I have no answer.

A simple update of a normal less effective work

A simple day at work. It is a Thursday. I have late afternoon lesson, she need to go off early. So no lunch...just some hi and she continue to do her work. Well some daily interaction is better than none.....well at least she is focused on her work. Though I guess she will have her daily smilely message for that person she smile at...... virtual messaging.

Well I decided to go get some ginger beer....not those that can be found in the supermarket. Thus I went online to search and found the following:

http://www.timeout.com/singapore/food-and-drink/seven-best-ginger-beers



I decided to go get it....and I just leave early. Called up.....got the Fever Tree Ginger Beer. Which I got it....took a direct bus down....arrange a game buddy saturday with another friend whom I met on Tinder. (opps am I multi-flirting.... or just looking for alternative) Well..... That is another story when it happens then.

So I went got 2 bottles.....and I am glad about it......so tomorrow I will bring to school...... With the chilling pack and chiller bag.....well since tomorrow she will definitely look for me.... I will just drop her the idea.....if she still say...."I prefer the more atas ginger beer".... i just tease her on it....ok I don't think I have atas one.....u got time to spare to take a look? and share with me?"

Well, I got to recalculate the marks and also finish up the last bit of the science quiz, the awards part. Another 3 weeks to go..... There are 3 pendings things

1. Othello
2. Climate Change board game
3. Solar Design
4. DSO attachment
5. JB trip
6. Semester end celebration if any
7. CCA returns

Well these are the few things, let the others be as it is bah...

A Tuesday that was Monday ran

For the whole day, 2 periods, 1 hours of CCE on Who am I? plus 2 periods..... knowing that I would meet whomever I wish to meet for the day, well. Not sure was it due to that or the lingering effects of Momentum Conference the previous 2 days. All the knowledge residing and settling down in the mind.

Of that, I was being labelled/described as 中毒 situation while I was catching up with another colleague. My vision or my mind is totally not connected and interpreting words. Haha.... As I was thinking about it, what struck my mind is ....maybe I didn't get to interact with Smoky.....for the whole day.... omg feeling. Anyway, what I told the colleague in affirmation that yup I need to 解毒 and will continue to do so until she leave. Anyway she was trying to scan documents and didn't manage to do so in staffroom 2. Well, it is also another situation that it can be highlighted.

Anyway this is just an incident to be remembered....a interesting label for a day....well association speaks of nothing much.... only truth is the way to set people free....the truth hurts when it does

Hypothetical scenario that may come about

A morning from here. Typing away the thoughts that I have.  It is just a thought, a possible scenario and what are the possible response that at this very moment I have. But as my mind run all these possible scenario, a thought creep up. So possible are these?

Will I give a pair of tickets, when I get it, to smoky? Not for my invitation for her but to let her to go with someone whom she like? Am I creating reason for myself to drift away?

This is a little too thought provoking. Some of it is a little outrageous. Well what are they? They are flick of desire, lust, and after thoughts from past experience Gifford by existing principles. They too me test my very principle.

However all these can be actualised. In appropriate proportion. In the end despite what I think, it reveals what my current state of mind. What will I do next after putting my vote or choice, will be still up to debate and consideration.  Like as I typing now, how come could someone in the world have the same name.... I like OMG state...

So may I infactuate or lust or like or love? It is still to be analysis. To be somewhat sure before any form of progress, though that may not alway be possible. Time does not wait for anyone, it is the constantly moving but unchanging thing of life. Everything is relative to it. To God, it is also relative too. Measured and taken reference with His.

So to ask a realistic rating question, how much do I enjoy her company. Between a rating of 1 to 10, 1 being total just a company to 10 is a very compatible engaging company. What will be my rating? Perhaps at least a 5 though it could be as low as 1 when she engages her phone which is giving her a smile and not the person. Will that be a possible discrepancy or moments? I think as I think about it, it is just put me puzzling what is the person able to do that is done over text while a physical person can't... Well let it be bah... She is her. She is her choice of her own.

Let God be the choice of it all. The mediator and all faithful knowing God. For Him thru all in all and over all, the creator and maker of all. What measure of grace He has with immeasurable love in all to come.

A Sunday that is preceeds a holiday monday

It is a Sunday that preceed a holiday Monday. A Monday that is of a difference indeed. What is so special about tomorrow other than it is going to be one with heavy emphasis learning the truth of God words realism in the current situation. For a Sunday, I have not lost count on the occurrence that I have being things related to smoky. Also thinking about work too. I also posted a postal question: which is better? Thinking of a person or a task?
I completed some of the work. However there are more to come. More to finish and do. Week 6/7 and another few more weeks,  what is there to plan.

I learn something from Dr Ravi Zacharias:

“Love is as much a question of the will as it is of the emotion. And if you WILL to love somebody, you can."

This really reinforce certain thought mindset. 

Now comes the what if: what if all invested she still choose someone else?and remain at friends zone. At this moment I have not thought of it. Does it matters to me? I think it does, for now I will put it aside.  Fond free friend fatithful 

My First 3 positive things of the week? day? Starting with a good friend (Number 14)

1. The lunch time spend with smoky over the quick lunch this week. Other than Thursday and friday. Quick lunch. Nothing personal. Helped her on information she need to submit.
2. Rekindle my first love for music. Found keyboard piano, tried to play the song Hallelujah by Jeffrey Buckley? And subsequently found the other simple chords and strumming pattern. Easy to learn and play
3. Tickets to momentum 2016 with keynote speaker Dr Ravi Zacharias... I am really blown away and educate by this man of God. Tomorrow another full day yeah