Psalm 144

DATE: 12/19/2005 06:26:22 PM

Content is out, need to relate it to my life.

Here is the effort of trying to relate it to my life.

v1: Praise be to the Lord my Rock, who trains my hands for war, my fingers for battle

Gives thanks to God, indeed, the wars are the greater scale of battle, and the linkage of the battles of wars are just like the linkage of the fingers of hands. The hand will not be what it is without the fingers, the individual fingers that made up the different roles, each fulfiling its task. Just like battles of a war, a war is consist of several battles, and how the relationship between the battles determines the nature of the war. Just as we are trained to fight in each of the battle, the bigger picture of the war we too have to keep in mind. The intregration of how the littles victory of the battles have the impact on the victory of the war. Thus, just as we are faithful with the little things, the little task that God have placed upon us to train us, slowly we can be learn and appreciate to be effective as a complete hand, seeing the bigger picture.

Viewing it from a different aspect, the scale of the usage of the tools we have for the scale that is needed for the task.

V2 He is my loving God and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield, in whom I take refuge, who subdues people under me

Applying a direct relation between loving God and my fortress, my stronghold with my deliverer, God is a place of refuge, also a place where you can see victories. In verse 6-7 where God helped to scatter the enemies and rout them. This seems to be an offensive act instead of a defensive act.

Verse 7 and 11 are where God is my deliverer, where he deliever and rescue me from the hands of foreigners whose mouths are full of lies whose right hands are deceitful. Lies and deception are common tools that the enemies use against us. The battle of the mind is the summary of it.

But also lets us not forget to sing a new song to God, to the One who gives victory to kings, who delievers his servant David from the deadly sword. The God who delievers deserve all our praise.

Verse 12-14 will encompassed the legacy and beauty of God's blessing, the scale which one king will be bless.

Verse 15: Blessed are the people of whom this is true = as with respect to verse 12-14, Blessed are the people whose God is the Lord. This 2 parts of the verse implies that blessed are indeed the people who have the legacy and the assest, also too blessed are the people whose God is the Lord. Relating them together can implies that blessed are the people whose God is the Lord with the equal blessing as those who have the legacy and the assest.

Verse 3 is pretty interesting - O Lord, what is man that you care for him, the son of man that you think of him.

A simple Psalm, praising God who trains hands for war, fingers for battle, how is a loving God and fortress, stronghold and deliverer, shield. Finally, blessed are the people whose God is the Lord and show how blessed the people are compared with. The assurance of God in one's life.

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A verse that started it all

DATE: 11/20/2005 07:01:34 PM

This is the verse that started it all, the verse that was given when I just came out of retrenchment and moving on with a new life. From a broken life that was led, a new life to be reborn. Just like the phoenix, set ablaze when it fades off and ends its life, but in the ashes of the remains, it births of new life and from the new life, with the ever present ability of its tears to heal, it is re-born, so CUTE! :)

Now the verse is found in Isaiah 30:15-26. a passage that was given my cell leader, in which was a great assurance and blessing to me, an encouragement for me to step forth in faith with the little faith that I have. As of like me, I will do a verse by verse analysis:

Verse 15- This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says:
"In repentance and rest is your salvation,
in quietness and trust is your strength,
but you would have none of it.

In the NASB version, instead of but you would have none of it, "But you were not willing". Unwillingness is the key factor that prevents one from receiving salvation and strength from the Lord. Without repentance and rest (upon on the Lord), where repentance here may refers to repentance from sin and rest is to seek rest in the Lord, where the home is in the heavens. From these two, where a taste of salvation can be received. Have none of quietness and trust and strength where it will not be drawn from the Lord. "Your strength will come from settling down in complete dependence on me--(The Message) A simplified explaination of the verse. Where strength comes from settling down in complete dependence on God.

Strength and salvation are what the Lord offers in the beginning, however, in verse 16, something otherwise, You said, 'No, we will flee on horses.'
Therefore you will flee!
You said, 'We will ride off on swift horses.'
Therefore your pursuers will be swift!

Reluctance and unwillingness will lead in to the much easies thing to do - Flee or hide. Just like in Genesis 3:10 Adam answered, "I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid." As fast as we flee from the things that we try to avoid, the faster they seems to pursue. This is true due to the fact that it is not about the fleeing away from problems, personal problems, problem of life, but as they are all personal, it is in the person, within the person that they are found. Thus in the first place, how can one person flee from himself?

Not only will one person "tries" to flee from "himself", in verse 17: A thousand will flee at the threat of one; at the threat of five you will all flee away, till you are left like a flagstaff on a mountaintop, like a banner on a hill." Even in strength and with overwhelming odds over the enemies, they will still flee. Perhaps this may be due to the fact that fleeing is already a habit and they do not recognise the strength that is within them. And when the threat is increased, all, not any part left, will all flee. The extent of fleeing is full and complete and without left to be considered. What is only left that only the leftover, the footmarks, the "were" of whoever had being there. A lonely sight, a sight of saying " I was here". A flagstaff, to signify the presence of an army. But witn only a flagstaff left, it either means the army was defeated or it fleed/retreated. In Exodus 17:15:-Moses built an altar and called it The LORD is my Banner.

All these are said to reflect the situation of fleeing aimlessly and instinctively, and like fighting the war alone, with just the flagstaff, with the banner alone. This it may be, however God is God and for he is gracious and there is a "yet".

v18: Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you;
he rises to show you compassion.
For the LORD is a God of justice.
Blessed are all who wait for him!

Despite all the fleeing and everything, God is still gracious. Not only that, he long to be gracious. He is one who is gracious and yearns to be gracious. In the Message, "GOD takes the time to do everything right--everything", in NLT "For the LORD is a faithful God". Blessed are all who wait for him. Blessed are those whose faith are upon him. In this verse, it show God's desire and the beginning of his promise. It shows how gracious God is, despite all, he still loves his people. How wonderful that God is so willing to take time to do everything right for us, for people that is sometimes lack of faith, that is so worthy. It is just so marvellous and assuring to know the Lord is a faithful God and he makes an effort to do things right.

More to come even after v18 which as come to v19:

O people of Zion, who live in Jerusalem, you will weep no more. How gracious he will be when you cry for help! As soon as he hears, he will answer you. Weeping can be of joy or of pain. But I believe in this context, it is of pain. The Lord here have heard the cries of his people. Cry for help, cry of whatever of life, for all these now, you will no more. No only then we will cry no more, but he will be gracious when we cry for help. Furthermore, as perhaps "his angels hear them", he will answer you. This has great implication that God will reply once he gets the message, and since he will be there when you cry out for help, that may also means that he will answer you immediately in some context. God will no longer be one that is so far away, but one that is no longer hidden. This is how our God's grace will be even we choose to flee from him in the first place. That is how great His love for us be. :)

More better things in v20: Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them.(NIV)

In the MSG version- Just as the Master kept you alive during the hard times, he'll keep your teacher alive and present among you. Your teacher will be right there, local and on the job.

Not enough that The Lord provides the food that our spirit man needs to go through tough times of life, or just to be-lieve on a life in Christ, our teacher, the holy spirit is one we can see now, seeing meaning available, right there and on the job with us doing with us.

Furthermore, the Lord does not only stop there. In v21:Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it." (NIV)

No only my teacher is visible, he is audible. Whichever the way we go, his voice will be the guide.

There can be 2 immediate interpretation of this verse alone. One is regardless of which direction one chooses in line to turn to, God's voice will be there. The other interpretation is that God's voice will direct which way is the correct way regardless of whether we are turning right or left, or not sure of which way to go. The voice behind also means that he is always there supporting and we has to take the lead, take the initiative and be at the forefront of it.

When all the above promise are proclaimed and believed, in verse 22: Then you will defile your idols overlaid with silver and your images covered with gold; you will throw them away like a menstrual cloth and say to them, "Away with you!"

In NSAB version: And you will defile your graven images overlaid with silver, and your molten images plated with gold You will scatter them as an impure thing, and say to them, "Be gone!"

In NLT version: Then you will destroy all your silver idols and gold images. You will throw them out like filthy rags. "Ugh!" you will say to them. "Begone!"

My initial understanding is the revealing of things unpure in one's life. But it is more than that. It is recognising them and start throwing them out of one's life. The idols in one's life, the images that one have place upon oneself, as they are trampled over once God reign in one's life. Thrown away after descrating them, and not re-using them again. For away they will leave and no expectation to return.

After taking away the idols of one's life, having a close relationship with the Holy spirit of guidance, there are even more exciting blessing coming along in which from v23-26, I at this moment only understand what does v23 means personally.

In v23: He will also send you rain for the seed you sow in the ground, and the food that comes from the land will be rich and plentiful. In that day your cattle will graze in broad meadows. (NIV)

The seeds that we sow, it depends a number of factor for it to grow. Firstly is the soil condition in which I will not elaborate here as it is well explained in the parable of the sower. The other is rain is need to provide water to the seed. Also water may in some case, be the activating component for the seed to start germinating. These seed may represent the seeds sow into people hearts. Not only after that, the food, the harvest after that will be plentiful and rich. Rich, perhaps in this case in in terms of the quality and re-emphasizing the quanitity of the harvest. The other view is the amount of food avaible to feed those who will in time feed on them. Not only the harvest is rich and plentiful, it is wide and far, just like the broad meadows. Clear pastures, clear view of the sun and the moon. Clear view of the horizon.

This passage is really the passage the so describe my life at that moment of time. Week 15 that I started to investigate into it. Just days after I decided and returned to church after 1 month of losing sight of my objective, burden by pain, failures and bondage, perhaps curses too. But now I can say one important thing, this verse is really true in my life and God is more real to me than before. He will fulfil promise and I begin to believe and be-living in his promise.

The 3 mistakes that I have made

DATE: 11/18/2005 10:22:04 AM

It has being a while that I have yet to post a spiritual blog;....guess I have not being that spiritual as before.....do you believe in that?.

This is just for myself to account for the 3 mistake that I believe are mistake that I have made and will be accountable to me and myself. They are things that I should not have done and should not do in the first place. However, they are already done and hereby, I record them down so that I will be able to keep a record, a document that I know what I have done and how much I am ready to face the situation.

1. Apr 2005 - Here is where all it begins. Just with a thought to know that person more, CSI, an action of just trying to bless, but I know I should not and try to control but failed to. Guess the failure to do so really hurts abit and shaken things abit, especially only days after my comeback from spiritual retrenchment. Just a simple act of trying to give pandols could mean so much to me....just how much and deep rooted the problem is that I may have forgotten most of it already. Now it is the time to resurface them to meet new challenges ahead, a new calling and to a new level of faith and service. That was also the time that I first ever though of stalking someone, after almost 7years, other 2 other people.

2. Sep19 2005 BBQ. Another stupid mistake by me, adding a very simple word which is just "always". A word that just come out so fluent, acting out, or of truth in mind. Regardless of which reason, the situation ahead seems different, from my own point of view. Or perhaps nothing have changed in the first place. But just I have being too sensitive. Am I just as always, picking on someone?

3.Last of the 3, the most prevailing one, and also the one that really shock me up thinking, am I out of control of the situation already? Stalking thought as usual, now coupled even worse, a type of feeling that I have not really ready to handle....something that was new to my life this 3-5 years, jealousy. Before that, I have never had really such issue. Perhaps I was so broken that the word does not even apply to me. But now, in a different situation and status, perhaps, me afraid to lose again, some sort of jealously have arised. Perhaps the words does not encompass the whole meaning of the current situation, but just plain fact that I am not ready for it. Or perhaps I should abandon the whole idea totally?

Anyway, mistakes are just moment of time where God can still move. As long as one is willing to be changed by God. For it is all these mistakes that I have made that make me so unique from the rest, haa haa UNIQUE. For Christ is whom defines me, and his way is which pings me, and his love is what assures me. As a quote I remember, a unreflected life is a life not worthy of going through. As i spare the limited time that I have to reflect upon my life, I realise God's grace and provision upon me. In all the mistakes I made, God is still there always. And even now, HE is always there, was and will always be.

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It's coming again, all over again with 3

DATE: 11/16/2005 11:01:50 PM

It is coming and it has come. Perhaps in the first place it should not even exist but it seemingly exist. It may be a flicker of my imagination, of the mind that is trying to overpower the heart, make the heart "think" the way the mind. Or it could be just calling that now is the things to get things settled.

Just a day before my first paper of the semester and 7months since I am back in business, the attacks of the mind is getting stronger and stronger. It has come to the sense that I now doubt, whether in the first place, I may have made a wrong decision to just wanna to find out more about the person. Now I am in a situation that I feel that I have already achieved what I reached out, what I set out for, but why am I still holding on. That is not good. I am not focus on the objective that I have set up and deviating from the things that I should be considering to be in place. But anyway, these are also the times that I do serious reflection. Time that forces me to think deep, force me to re-think my actions and my way of thoughts. Also it test my faith and will of choice. Easily I could just flee, but I wonder why did I stay on. Why did i so called stay on to continue "torturing" myself in such situation. But I realise that without me going through it now, I will have to face it in a later part of my life. Thus sooner or later, I still have to face it and the situation, circumstance will be different from now. Thus, this time round, I wish to do it well, at least know that I have walked the path faithfully and leave the rest to God whom will be in control of all things.

The second thing that I will leave a note here is regarding the issue of stalking. It is the 3rd time round I found myself guilty of it. And still I don't fully understand or fully accept the fact or the truth. I remember what my cell leader told me that somethings human are just so simply need so many lesson to learn a lesson. With this remark, I ponder whether am I too, guilty of it and takes a few occasion to make me able to learn and intergrate the lesson into my life??? Puzzling it may be, but it is true. There are somethings in my life that still the Lord to teach and guide me. Blind spots they are called by some, as they are blind to the person who have them. Nevertheless, God is still gracious and merciful as HE will send people, brother and sister in christ, speaking through them and reveal the blind spots of my life. This is not to disgrace or disvalue me, but with the ultimate purpose that I will know HIM more, allow me to change to the person that God have intended in his plan for me, for the service to his kingdom. For one have said, it take easy to remain silent, but hard to "rebuke" constructively.

Ultimately, I still hold on to 2 truth. One from 1 Corinthians 1:4-9(NIV) :

I always thanks God for you because of his grace given you in Christ Jesus. For in in him you have been enriched in every way - in all your speaking and in all your knowledge- because our testimony about Christ was confirmed in you. Therefore you dod not lack any spiritual gift as you eagerly wait for our Lord Jesus Christ to be revealed. HE will keep you strong till to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ. God, who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful.

2 from 2 Corinthians 2:3-7 (NIV):

Praise be to God and Father of our Lord JEsus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves haver received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patien endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just a syou share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.

2 passages that although I have not really followed up every often for the past 4 years, but they are two passages among the few that I will hold on.................the 2 passage that I will use to testify for baptism, may they be.

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A seemingly similiar but different exams

DATE: 11/10/2005 05:20:52 PM

It looks like a very similiar situation as before, as of last semester. Reading week and here I am, mugging in library. With thoughts and interest that seems the same as before, however, there are some difference I believe since then and now. There is a greener and clear vision of what to do now, with what objective to set and what are the boundaries that are there. However, within such situation, there is still always a God that is always in control. At this point, there are a couple of observation that are different, which I will try my best to elaborate on them as I remember.

1. Cell groups is going through a tranformation, a time of challenge and a time of building up in faith of one voice. There is a deeper calling for everyone to work closer and more united, in a community in tune with the calling of God in mind of all that will come about. Although the roles are being spelt out, I believe since the recent prayer meeting, there seems to be something still lacking, a level of a different that is the gap between what we wish to do and what we hope to achieve. However, I believe with all my heart that God is always and will be in control and will speak clear to everyone in the cell group. The only question in mind that I have is for God, what do I need to do now and what role and aspect do I play in such a progress. Well these are just thought swhich I dun think anyone will know as noone will read this blog. Thus, I could safely say this, I really want to see some change, united in spirit and to see God move powerfully in the cell group. And also, I dun really wish to do it seemingly alone with the preception that I am alone in this. It is tough unless I know clearly that God is in the mist and I am being called clearly for it. OH GOD !!!!

2.The very strange question to ask myself, am I indifferent now or I am just merely suppressing it. Or I am afraid to admit the truth or I have not yet surrenderred it? Does missing someone means anything? There are question that are remained unanswered and remain questioned, but however, there is a difference now. There is a change of priority and there is a clear goal in mind to walk towards. That is an area of ministry. I believe and will continue to believe that God will speak to me clearly when I have continued to perserve now till next semester, continously listening to HIM and learning to obey HIM. As like a blind man without sight should not lead another blind man, for me, I should hear and see God's instruction and move in according to his instruciton with full faith and openess that he is in control and all-knowing with the heart giving the best for me. Although it may remain incomprehensible, unclear and this moment, persist in the promise that God has given and not stride astray. Now with more people knowing who the person is, perhaps due to myself, well, now I must have created such an outcome for myself to bear with.

Luke 11:35-36 (NIV) See to it, then the light within you is not darkness. Therefore, if your whole body is full of light, and no part of it dark, it will be completely lighted, as when the light of a lamp shines on you.

Happy mugger exam

Things I still dun understand

DATE: 10/28/2005 09:19:26 AM

Even since DMH or DMG, changes have being made and situation have changed too. There are still things that I dun not understand. Also believing that this blog noone would bother to come and read, thus there is no fear about it anyway... Also those who are going to read this blog, are likely not be involved. Thus there is no harm to write freely in this. Of course being me, and me, that is the limit.

First to start with, well I have reduced my talking around and avoiding talking to ... well am I making it too obvious. But this is for people to know and find out but well not that I would care less, but I know that God is just doing a work in me, and He is just helping me to stay focus..... there are just so many reason and supporting reason behind it, tons of those that I could get that off my fingertips, except still when so and so is around, I just wonder why I still CMI !!! Behinds I really CMI, and I should just surrender it fully, get back to just focus fully towards God and just be X-CP. Well though I may be complaining now, however, deep in my heart, I can confidently say this, God, you are one and I believe fully in your plans. Just let me do what you wanna me to do is more important. Life is still meaningful and purposeful when withou so & so. Anyway, this issue have degarded to the extent that there are more important things around other than this, unless situation arises that I am caught off-guard and surprised. But from what I understand so & so, things will not happen if I do no lose control.

Secondly, with a great news that may be coming, but why am I affected by it. A great start for someone, but may I trying to do too much last minute work??? May I trying to break things up or just wishing them the best of blessing, giving my best and hope to them the best??? After sharing with my DGL, I know I am far from ready. And too, do I really want, or have I want so much to an extent I already given up hope, and I am doing now is just fanning a rekindled fire??? The desire of my heart is for the person to know who God really is, and from then, God, with great wisdom, and guide the person towards a direction. I guess me hoping to go thru the materials from SOL1 will help and keep in focus, something that should not have a structure and just flows, to be one that is useful and not lose control. It is not about falling into it but growing into it. This is something that I learnt and I wish to remember it. All this is just a seperate thing, but an extension of friendship. A pro-longing of friendship to a different level. Guess despite I may think I know, maybe in actual fact, I do not know anything. But important and best thing is. God is God.

Lastly, regarding surprise birthday. Well, though many many times since then, I may have mentioned that I will disappear from my birthday. But no-one really wish to know what I actually want. Perhaps in the first place I do not know. Perhaps I just do not have the fortune to have such things. A total of 3 such things I have attended, but I guess me being a smart person, it is hard for me to be surprised. But I know, though I am shy to cry in such situation, I dun mind really tearing with joy....but that will take a lot of effort and seriously, no one I know will do such a thing to me for it takes a lot of wisdom to do so...Reason being, since I have already mention this in this blog, when the time comes again, I am unusually sensitive and hyperactive to things around me. I dun mind planning for surprise for others, but unfortunately, I cant plan any for myself. Well, nonetheless, God is good all the time. I will not die without it.

In conclusion, since this blog is not going to be read by anyone, so a conclusion is not really needed. Why conclude when there is no need start in the first place. God bless....God pray....A daily stable walk with God....the best conclusion despite everything. CHS or whatever. There are a total of 4 cai that I know, among, 2 I still know now and the other 2.....just away. then.

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How to reach unity in the Body of Christ via preparing God’s people for works of service?

DATE: 10/23/2005 07:34:43 AM

Preparation work required for God’s people for works of service V1 Live a life worthy of the calling you have received

How?

v2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient; bearing with one another in love.

Humble to receive, gentle with the calling = gift

Patient to wait for results Bearing with one another in love – Tolerating each other – each endure one another as we are all in diversity

Bearing- to suffer without complaining A life worthy of the calling = service to God = constantly attacked by the evil ones:

Ephesians 6:12 “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”

V3 Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace Why?

V4-6 There is one body and one Spirit – just as you were called to one hope when you were called – one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over and through all and in all.

Let compare V5 and V6

V5 One Lord = V6 Over all. He is Lord, King of King. He is the Lord, thus he can be considered to be Over all, over all things. Where over can means ruler / Lordship.

V5 One faith = V6 Through all. It is faith that brings us through all things. Faith in Lord is one basis, a point in life where we start to ask from him, a trigger for our desire and a direction change of focus to him to become the source of all

V5 One baptism = V6 In all. Baptism, from our church practise involves immersion, which in terms, in water. As there is only one baptism in our life, we can be in all of God’s given life and blessing once we went through that one baptism. After baptism, we are going into a new life, new beginning that God has given us. Thus One baptism can be related to In all.

As these are interesting side point for ponder, we can somewhat agree in a way that unity can be maintained with bond of peace = diplomacy. Incidents and events in history can prove that there exists some situation where peace can be the mediator of unity.

V7 Recognise the grace and blessing that Christ have apportioned

V8b “When he ascended on high, he led captives in his train and gave gifts to men.” →V1a As a prisoner for the Lord = prisoner of the world but for the Lord!

V11 It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelist and some to be pastors and teachers The chapter begins with “As a prisoner for the Lord”, coupled with verse 11 that speaks of him being the one who gave us the gifts, which are the appointments of role for us in the family of God. The talents and blessings he have given us for his purpose, for his glory, and also creating chances for us, the best knowing way for us to know him more in depth through ministry and daily walk. Recognising the grace and blessing that Christ have apportioned to us is a gesture similar to acknowledge his sacrificial death as atonement for our sin on the cross. Just as we receive a new life as we believe Christ as our saviour, we too receive the calling, the grace and blessing that Christ have apportioned as we recognise it was him who gave some to be .., and he ascended on high, led captives in his train (his pathway) and gave gifts to men. V9-10 further illustrate he ascend and descend, the details to increase our understanding of his action.

A profound equation between one body and one spirit to one hope that we are all called to. There is a relationship between one body & one spirit with the hope. Body = world, spirit = heavenly. One hope = Christ/ God.

Why prepare God’s people for works of service?

V12b-13 Work of service until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ

Work of service allows us to have opportunities to put our faith upon God on things. “Chances” for God to work in our lives, knowing how God works via prayer and his Hand. Just like working together hand in hand with God. More contact time = more chance of interaction = better knowledge of God.

Maturity comes as we experience more with works of service. One can’t deny that through works of service after being prepared for it, that he would be able to understand and learn with the guidance of the Holy spirit, become mature in the way he/she thinks and attain the whole measure of the fullness of Christ. Doing the service itself have so much to yield, and the experience taken back are far more valuable that the books that we read. Thus why some experiences are sometimes hard to pen down.

V14 Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming.

Reasoning, processing verse of the results that are attained for v12b-13. Mature = no longer be infants. Attaining the whole measure of the fullness of Christ = we are saints. Yeah saints that have the wisdom and communication with God that our concern is of God and not of man, thus we will not be blown here and there, just like the spirit, but our spirit is guided by the Holy one. A spirit can be blown here and there by every wind of teaching and the schemes of men. However, one that have the knowledge of Christ, in unity of spirit through the bond of peace, as a saying, the more the merrier, the more the stronger too.

With V 12-14 may be too difficult and wide to cope and comprehend, V15 further simplify matters with: “Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ” After reasoning, a generalising point, speaking the truth IN LOVE. We can just plainly speak the truth, but we know that sometime the truth hurts, and the truth may be a hard pill, or a pill that is hard to swallow. The truth, the word of God, in his spirit, that we will in all things grows up into him who is the Head. This reaffirms points that were mention beforehand:

“Grows up into him” – Mature, no longer be infants “In all things”- Attaining the whole measure of the fullness

Combining these two phrases, we will have fulfilled what was mentioned in V13b, mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ

Here, too, firstly introduced that Christ is the head of the Body, where we grow into him. Grow into him, can be interpreted as growing to be like him, growing towards him, growing to know him more. This point is further illustrated in V16, “From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.”

From him, whom is the centre of things, the centre focus, we are all joined together. As explained in Biology, the head is where our brain is located. It is too, where all our actions, temperature, movement, reactions are controlled. Similar to Christ, He is the one who control all things, who to be saved, how are we going to save them, who to pray for, what to pray for, how our lives can be lived best for him in order for the best for us with the radiance for the glory of God. As supporting ligament can wear and tear, thus we have to grow and build itself up in love. The key words are grow, build, and in love. We can grow and build, but not in love, only with the objective of getting what we want, what we wish to obtain from God. Then how are we going to attain unity in the Body of Christ? We can grow and build in love, but however without each part doing its work, it is still the same effect. Imagine the heart say one day that he want to take a break from his work, then how would the other part of the body get their fresh blood transport goods, and get their waste transport. Similar to that of lungs with oxygen. As a Body of Christ, with Him as the head, from Him we are that joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work. Every word is important and just leaving as one of them out will not allow us to attain the unity in The Body of Christ, Unity of the Spirit.

Application: What are the steps that we should take?

Remember the steps:

1. Live a life worthy of the calling you have received

2. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace

3. Recognise the grace and blessing that Christ have apportioned From these steps on, remember the final stop, where is the ending point.

DMG done...thus evaluating DMH

DATE: 10/11/2005 06:45:55 AM

DMG = Damage is done. However after DMG, alphabetically, is DMH which is the follow points

1. D=Disobedience. True there is still some disobedience on my part, due to lack of faith, doubts and just plain rebellious. For I know that the fruits of disobedience is just disobedience which can lead to multiple things ahead. This being the first letter towards any damage that may possibly be done, it hold the keypoint to the other two things. With this area of my life settled, just like the blind getting vision, all other things of life will get into place. Thus ACtually I could just end of here but to further describe the situation, I will continue to the next point



2. M=Mistreatment. I will not deny mistreatment of others, but perhaps it is just my fault to be double agenda-ed. To speak with no agenda in mind, as being a defensive position is not actually the best way. Let God to be in the picture and his HS guidance with constant communion with Jesus will be the best solution to this. But it seriously hurt and bring doubt (as much as I speak of true concern and not mistreatment). Perhaps this may also manifest into a different form but both are of the same point. As I will elaborate the last point.



3. H=Harrassment. A strong word to begin with but not something to be taken lightly. Perhaps indeed I have overdo it, cross the boundaries and should retreat now before again someone will have to go to the altar for healing every now and then .What a dispressing information to know of the extent of hurt that can be caused upon. Till now, I have yet to seek reconcilation, and still wonder is there a need. Or should I surrender and move on? What is the best solution to this? Same as with now, what should I do now? Will history repeat itself or God will be acting differently now? For without 2 there is no 3, for without 1 there is no 2.

With all these 3 points, being 2 and 3 are more worldly, in which doing what is the easiest is escapism, thus choosing opposite to stay, to remain in the situation, to believe that God will pull me through. However, I could summaries all these to one point, which I believe strongly God is directing me towards, that is a prayful life for me to cultivate. One that is consistent and ever growing deep in relationship with him. With such a foundation in hand, there is nothing that will separate, nor tear apart, nor stumble for the foundation is built on Christ the ROCK. Yeah!

Spiritual maybe empty, but spiritual things can still be learnt through daily yielding to the spirit,.

Personality Style Description

DATE: 10/04/2005 06:42:32 AM

A team player, Mi readily relinquishes personal interests and goals to accommodate those close to mi. Mi is loyal to a fault; but others may sometimes question My unwavering dedication to current relationships and methods. Mi values security, and usually does my best to avoid sudden changes in my environment or situation.

Mi is a fact finder and does things "by the book". Mi can be sensitive if others are being critical of my work, especially if they have not carefully reviewed all the data. Mi have expectations before undertaking new projects, and mi works hard to meet standards. Mi will typically maintain a neat and orderly work environment.

Mi prefers a rational and moderate approach when first entering new situations and tries to avoid extremes. Mi likes the company of others, but Mi is equally comfortable spending a quiet evening alone. Mi is a realist who will always weigh my options before mi makes a decision to move ahead.

Mi would prefer things stay the same, rather than to risk a new venture (unless it is proven and true). Mi is typically peaceful and low key, and is usually seen by those around mi as a good friend and listener. Mi tends to adopt a "wait and see" attitude about things, rather than taking charge of a situation, usually preferring to let others take the lead.

This is the result done from the test at http://www.personalitystyle.com/User_Signup_Create.asp

Wierd URL....but thru this link....managed to get something DISC-evolved test description.

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Cry of my heart

DATE: 10/03/2005 05:54:46 AM

Oh! It being a while since I last blogged anything consistently. When it is due to the fact that I have to undergo a period of my life, to answer certain question which I silently always tried to avoid. Though I have to admit I still struggle and get irritated by it, somehow, there is more freedom in this area...but being someone who use to hope to achieve perfection.

I always remeber this question in my mind.

Qn: What is the reason to find a helper?

Simple question but tough answer...even at this moment I can give some sort of answer, but I dun think I could give a very good answer for that....because there may still be things that I am unsure of myself at this moment.... But anyway, I know personally that God is always in control and he always being through all these time, especially through tough times. My heart stirs and my eyes becomes wet when I reflect back....perhaps due to the past disappointments, however definitely in my heart, knowing the grace and mercy of God in my life.

I wanna to see a breakthrough in this area. Perhaps I am someone who is too, an attention seeker, need security and feel unrejected. High S I with some C character, woah.......mmmmmm.....

Lord, I believe that you are the one whom can pull me through this period of time. Even though it is so much seemingly tougher than just slacking around, doing nothing, but now I have to continue with life and yet be always available to you. But I know, though I may not understand, believing in the light that you shine forth, the direction towards you and away from the darkness....and into a freeland, you bring me to.

With Trust and believe in Jesus Christ, whom a relationship have already being established

Blog is back now and maybe later

DATE: 09/30/2005 09:19:27 AM

Hi to all, the past few months were tough. Times where changes of attitude need to be made....being a High S I person.....slow and resistance to change....it takes time for me to change. But I just wanna to Thank God....He has brought me thru these till now and He is still guiding me, in faith, under grace and mercy, with love. A more focused person I am more than before, someone whom just only wish to achieve as much as I can, as one thing as I can, to win souls.......

Despite mi being double agenda-ed....but I know, HS and God is takes higher priority. And God have being good to me so far till now, blessing me with determination to study, the joy of staying in a place of service, I still wish to cry out more....where is the faith of mine that see me thru my tough times......the broken times.......indeed I may have being more broken now, but I know God is more reliable now in all things. .... Events one after another, just challenge mi and focus mi more to him, as the source of strength, guidance and comfort.

Isaiah 30:15b: In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quiestness and trust is your strength, but you are not willing

Isaiah 30:18 Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice, Blessed are all who wait for him!

A imprefect man following a all perfect God.

How to be a Lover

DATE: 06/27/2005 08:37:40 PM

How to be a Lover – Luke 7:40-49: Parable of the two debtors

Just a few simple facts that are being brought forward; firstly, gratitude is the true motivation of love. When we are aware of how much God has done for us we are truly grateful. A heart of thanksgiving for life’s blessing and opportunities enables a sense of indebtedness but may not make us sensitive to the needs and plight of people less fortunate. There is a situation that some may relate to; we are grateful to what God has done, but not able to break out of the cycle of the idea that God has blessed us because we are good, and we try to be good because God blesses us. This problem is hypocrisy. Another point to include is profound gratitude is the result of forgiveness. For those who love little, they because they have been forgiven little; for those who love profoundly because they had been forgiven immensely. The twist of this parable is that, it is not the adulterous woman who had the larger debt, but the Pharisee’s pride-festering hypocrisy was a far greater debt. Carefully constructed self-righteousness has led to self-sufficiency that will begin to lead us to believing that God is privileged to have us among His chosen people. The sign that we are overextended in debt is that we think someone else needs forgiveness more than we do.

The forgiven woman becomes our role model, our focus. The warm and gracious people of the world are those who have been forgiven. The greater the depth of contrition, the higher the heights of compassion. When we know that we are sinners saved by grace, we become lovers communicating hope to others. There is nothing we can do or say that will negate Christ’s love – except the pride of Simon. Only a sinner needs a Saviour. If there is no realization of our need, no sensitivity of the distance between what we are and cold be – then we have blocked all possibility of being a lover.

Lastly, Jesus could give His beatific benediction only to the woman. Her confession of need was rewarded by forgiveness and the promise of evolving peace: “Go into peace”; go into an ever-increasing experience of God’s unifying, healing wholeness. What that means for us is that peace grows with each new realization of our sin. Each day has it realization of failure and missed opportunities. We will never be free of the consciousness of our potential or of the read availability of grace. Life can be separated into the tight compartments of daily adventure and freedom to fail. We need not carry any tension of unconfessed sin into our tomorrows. Peace is the gift of God that replace the anxiety of guilt.

To be a lover is to let God forgives us! Forgiveness will lead to a burst of gratitude. The way the woman cared for Jesus, is the way we are to care for people. We will never be able to do enough. For again how the woman cared for Jesus is how to be a lover. The more our Lord forgives us, the more we will become more sensitive, compassionate, open and forgiving lovers.

Imported Bdae Wish list

AUTHOR: Fredrik Freggis
TITLE: Imported Bdae Wish list
STATUS: Publish
ALLOW COMMENTS: 1
CONVERT BREAKS: 0
ALLOW PINGS: 1
CATEGORY: Personal

DATE: 06/27/2005 02:56:57 AM
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BODY:

Birthday wish List:
1. Corrinne May Fly away album (better ask b4 buying as I may get it myself)
2.Board game - A&A 2nd Version by Avalon Hill, Strange Syngergy by SJ Games, or AOB (Any other boardgames I dun have but ask first)
3.A date with me? I am seriously thinking of a makeover around my birthday(if you can guess when is mine) (but will need my cell leader approval first, plus my mum)
4. Just dun...
5.Saw $45 Masimaro + Hamtaro at Orchard Cineleisure...they look so cute.
6.No MS-G added...for those who know. = Mono-sodium Glutamate??

I will evaluate the above mentioned wish list individually.

1. Corrinne May Album - Fly Away - It is an album that brought me thru my 1st and 2nd year of Uni, especially when the dramatic 1st year when I invited KHB for some show and AOB. Anyway, it is not due to her recommandation, but also the songs was so rich with meaning, and if related to Christ, it is could be one of praise and worship, admiration and giving thanks to God. Thus it is an album, perhaps yes whatever you may say and know, I may abmit them because I can't deny them But one thing for sure...this time round, I wanna to watch her concert in Singapore, regardless of whatever reason or purpose it is going to be.

2.Board games - A tool that I have a gaming group that I have yet to organise to meet yet ( basically they are my camp mates.) Furthermore, with my $$ diverted to VS, also due to lack of space at home, I have bought less board games and the market offers B.G that are sometimes beyond my budget or my taste. Thus AOB is considered when you wanna to get any for me as currently there isn't one that is displayed at this moment that caught my eye, or arouse my interest yet...yup I admit....I am seriously distracted.

3.Makeover....yup I have being considering it for a few months already, perhaps even up to 1/2 a year. Just that there was no reason or motivation for me to do it. Also, I didn't want to makeover because of attract or chasing purposes. But thank God, he gave me a vision already, which have some uncertainty of the purpose but I will still continue to pray (start to pray to be exact). A Date...haha.....I dun deny the desire, but it is a dangerous one. Thus, just out of serious joking, with serious consideration, this is just a point and remain a point. A date is a bit too far fetch for me to handle, but upon God approval and his will. There is no denying of this, but if it gone too far, I am prepared to cut off this / reject it totally in the name and power of Jesus. I hope it is not a trap that I am setting for myself to fall into. That will quite frightening. As speaking in faith, I drop into a faithful trap. There are other accompanying issues but all are in the dangerous frontline of warfare, a place I have always find myself in, but always in high stress level and only a wrong choice will kill me, but a continous walk will bring a growth and experience that I will appreciate to great due later

4.Just dun.....well just dun can refer to 3 too, but it has a more indepth meaning to that.....as I have always have plots twist around to get myself off....the thing that I desire the most is the thing that I fear the most when I get. Such fear is unhealthy, and have to be constant checked with the holy spirit. Thus just dun.....can mean more if you fully understand me, what I have walked thru......

5.Yup,.....I was led to walked into a shop that sold large soft toy then I saw the hamataro and Mashimaro. Also Steve mentioned them out of the blue, not seriously I believe regarding them. Thus what ......but anyway....yup I dun deny wishing for them, but practically and realistically, have to consider they are both white colour...so can get dirty.....hmmmm....also space on my bed.....and my other bear bear may get jealous....when so far from my knowledge, no one have caught the art of what type of bears I like....and how do I choose them.....so will need a more sensitive person to choose them.....this skill, from what I know, does not belong to either gender.....it is all about the heart of looking.

6. No MSG...it is double meaning....MSG is a flavouring.....MS-G, well it is an encoded language again....but well, as it is a common one.....however after going thru a poor week, I am considering at this moment to include flavouring as one of my fasting item too. Yup MSG also rumoured to cause hair to drop more.....either in the body or due to stress....yup yup..

Anyway, be very sure before considering all this....there is more preparation work done and earlier before I wrote the birthday wish list.....so beware.

First Personal Games blog on DOTA

DATE: 06/22/2005 09:38:42 AM

Yup this is my first Game blog on DOTA....well the heroes I use are the following

1. Fire Babe - Linu Inverse, Slayer

2.Homy missile- Boush, Tinker

3.Icey Babe - Rylai Crestfall, Crystal Maiden

Zap, Homing missle, bite....they are my trained heroes and better run when you see them......as again, this is meant to be a SP = Spiritual Personal blog....I will speak of some stuff from this.

1. Slayer, quick to kill, no mercy. Accurate calculation of HP needed together with mana. These are the game aspect, but in life, we need to know who is our target, their potential and our reserve and ability. From here, act quick and decisively and...boom...there it goes.

2. Tinker, hit hit and blind, then missle. HP again as usual, but no need to aim.....plus of course one other stuff... What to learn? Know your keypoint in life, your movements in life and where to position yourself is an important key. Then when to hit the mark...and let the work do itself.

3.Maiden, bite bite, hit hit, frost, or bite and freeze. Cold jokes...yeah that is the way to make own self freeze.....but no good. However, in general you have to know when to make the humour and the correct time, when there are audience. In conclusion, something there is only one shot.

Well, as again I believe MS will not read this blog....so there is going to be one shot. Cold jokes...haha.......I bought a joke book hoping to change the style of my jokes...haha, have not started reading it yeah...playing too much game...no good. Fasted for a short moment only....guess I wish to fast some more....for a better purpose, a better use of time. At this moment just a little disfocuse (little...hmm), anyway...yup yup MS is back in SG, Corrinee May is back in SG on 10 Aug 2005 for a concert at the "durian place". Anyone wish to accompany me? Any ideas on how to get MS??? hmmmm...bad F.F, bad F.F. only know how to try to get MS out...bad bad bad.....well...a little derviation may be a little good during stress moment. However, focus on ministry, focus on entering the vision. My 12, my 12...where are they

Yup indeed Thailand, Lord is that the place you wanna me to serve...SL...Wonder what can I learn from the up-coming Gateway Youth Convention. and it overlaps with that T.G. event.....where can see photos......what a tough decision to make.....yup I must always remember as I type this.....To Lord: Disrupt everything that is not of you....Something I will remember as the same as Isaiah 44:20 " He feeds on ashes, a deluded heart misleads him; he cannot save himself, or say, "Is not this thing in my right hand a lie?"

A verse that brought me thru these 4 years. A simple verse but yet multi-meaning and stuff can be extraced from it. Of course some of the related verse are taken from a study bible, which is a gift to my cell leader...yeah.

Anyway there is still one issue to settle at this very moment....but I have yeah to act...guess the current situation may implies that I am not ready....well....patience...yeah...be patient.

Yeah my good friend bought the lastest album of Corrinne May for me......how sweet......will try to get it autographed if possible...... :)

There all folks of updates

New happenings

DATE: 06/16/2005 10:25:00 AM

Thank God....it has being a while since the last blog....lots of things happen....yeah finally NYJC made it....they won the championship.......it was a overkill by bookie Cheekit training system. Though still I was not happy with some incident, but joy still overflows till the extent with stress....upset my stomach and devoid me from a good dinner......but of course manage to play DOTA with them.....well Gary is really too good.......have to pay attention to him. Farming too well is a great threat. Any way....so much for the IJCOC....finally I can fully retire.....where is doramon?? oh boy....where is shifu.? where is WY?

A poor decision / poor organisation skill....now I missed most of the RLL cluster camp.....also went back with a poor intuition act to a 05-03 room incident......sigh......I should have being more C and D. Guess I was too tired and a bit of negligence. Well well....now have to train my C details more. Learn from Ps Lily...haha.....also plus arrow warning........a too cautious move....well natural I believe is still the best way out. Focus on God in all things. Yup that is what I learn...plus.....in all things speak when necessary on such issues....R issues and dun speak too much...act too weird.....it will ultimate give a signal.

Vision, yes from the cluster camp, I receive. Vision of a opening door, a path that I walked....written I have....plus another vision...Long.....White cap.....Pray is the word I got......after having increased my faith level to believe in a ....., after RL combined meeting, Casual with M S, how abt my S M-men? Outing with them...to what extent? should I continue? A dilemma now that I have to set certain limits.....set certain boundaries....for now I know, it is hard....but thank God for all the chats, phone calls....thank God Thank GOD. Mindsets are starting to clear, faith is starting to rise up......yeah I know I am still not ready....responsibilty and authority for his service. Spiritual maturity...yup indeed important. At this moment, with a Corrinne May concert coming up....how how......should I or shouldn't I?....better ask my cell leader.......am I going to fast? should I or shouldn't I? The barrier will be the G12 vision (which is important to me) and church...but I believe now, God have the best for me and he has the best plan.....pray pray pray....that is what he wants me to do.

Chalet, a chalet that was relaxing, but yeah with new changes....thank God. Well at least IJCOC is over...cluster is over....now trying to pack my room. My stuff that are back......next week packing week. Yup new changes at home....new changes I need to do.....but I know those are things that God is preparing me for.....Lord just let me not strife away from what you intend for me. I believe you are doing a new work in me. I learn something " Fear is not to be the God of your life. Fear of God is to be part of your life with God" A prayer book I have bought to record all the prayer request, prayed stuff.....prayer list....whatever....recording too all the words/phrase of wisdom that God gave me.....for future use. ..opps....as I write this blog...I realise forgot to pray this...forgot to pray that....oh boy....thank God.....I better act next time round.

Really late already...guess I gtg....and rest......pray pray abit.....also with NUS dialup almost time up....BB....still thinking.....$$$ issue. Makeover......still thinking......perhaps when my birthday approaches. Just makeover for once......but if I were to....sorry no pixs uploaded......but you can request from mi...ask and it will be given. Who gave mi that makeover idea.......or affirm that idea.....hmmmm......just guess and you may hit the right person....for what purpose.....well...perhaps for a change...yeah......a preparation stage.....

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Shrewd Saints -A One of ones

DATE: 06/16/2005 09:49:37 AM

Luke 16:1-17 - Parable of the Unjust Steward

Shrewd = Keen, artful, astute, innovative. Words that are associated to the word.

This chapter that I read is really interesting. Shrewd, a not so good word but yet something that we may neglect the benefits when we serve. The two things that shrewdness one that could come to grips with a crisis of a real situation and one that produces an energetic, sagacious plan to solve life's problem. Jesus affirms the willingness in us to dare to believe that there is nothing too big for God. Seek and ask for wisdom on matters on our knees in consecration. James 1:5 - ?.... a verse that God already have affirmed his willingness to give wisdom when we need it. When the Lord allows us to drift into complexities which to us seem to be unsolvable, so that He can be the source of the solution, let us see these opportunities as potential, potential for God to use his given intellect, emotion, will in us to devise a plan that will astound us and the people around us....may the glory of Him be magnified. Let us see difficulties as a dynamic prelude to new advancement. That include what is describe in this parable. If an unjust steward could us money to gain friends, why can't the children of light use to make friends, influencing the people with the same power available that raised Jesus from the dead instead of the media. Our purpose is to use material resources as an expression of our friendship with God to make others His friends. That's the purpose of tithing and giving to Christian causes (woah from the book)...Indeed I fully agree. As Wesley was right: "Earn all you can, save all you can and give all you can." I believe as what the book have written, The Lord wants shrewdness in the earning and distribution of our money. In v13 speaks clearly, I just like to add another verse Mark 12:28-33 - Love God with all your heart......everything's possible now with a keen ardent, wholehearted response.

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PvP, Prayer of People

DATE: 06/08/2005 06:23:10 AM

The Prayer God won’t Answer – Luke 18:9-14 Parable of the Pharisee and the Publican

Both of them are Jews, in common not being admitted to temple for P-rayer. Firstly to see how the Pharisee prays; a comparative one that is not only odious, but opportunistic. He is a prayer that tries to lift him up by putting another down. By right, we are all on equal acceptance of Gift of Jesus. We are not based to being better than others but how God has gifted us to be. This, together based in externals, based on deeds and not character / personalities, shaking foundation that can fully be horrifying independent from God. A life that is without God’s deeds and all based on self-deeds. A deception of our mind into thing that we are right with God, however, it may be rationalizing to protect our ego, to fight to make us secure – even at the cost of fighting God. The purpose of prayer is to see things as they are; ourselves as we really are; God as He has revealed Himself to be. A pride that distorts our capacity of self security it may lead to without our security in which we are in God, in his world. When without an identity in God, where will our humility comes when we do not recognize God’s authority in all. Comparative, external, prideful and humility lacking prayers are ones that God would not answer.

Humility is an outward expression of gratitude, honesty, and courage to grow. Indeed this is a difference between the two Ps in prayer. Sin, common to both, but easily misunderstood in this case. Sin is separation from God, but from one’s purpose and potential. We will never able to outgrow our need for God’s love, forgiveness, guidance and indwelling power but only increasing grow in our desire and recognition of their importance in our life, more important is HIM who freely gives. The opportunities, not just the failures that drive one back to him. Ultimately, humility, an avenue that God will reward with justification, which the publican received graciously. A prayer of humility is a prayer that God will answer, and humility, itself, is more than an outward expression, but it too is an inward experience that I believe will have to come first. An infilling of the holy spirit and a surrendering of a life of sin for a renewed heart and life that is God centred, and God directed, with a humility of God. A God’s humility. Woah.

Gift, u wanna to receive?

DATE: 06/02/2005 08:36:42 PM

God wants to give you a gift – Luke 11:1-13; 18:1-8: Parables of Importunity

A simple title for an article, but yet it may take great faith to receive it. How much truth is this statement depends to the measure of faith we have, towards this statement and ultimately towards God. God, here is the giver. I personally believe that God know what is the best to give us, but he more willing to wait for us to pray and believe that he will give. Nonetheless he very much wants to give us a gift. However, our perception of God will determine what to ask for, how to ask for and the most important step, whether it should be asked. This may be why we always struggle to pray. There are a few things that I learn, the whys and how. We may have tried to find time to pray, but a more in-depth rooted, that is our conception of God. Praying is not trying to overcome God’s reluctance or as a guilt-ridden accountability time for an inventory of our sins. Neither of these motivates us to a communication with God, of prayer or of announcing his asking. In fact, he already knows how needs, and is more ready to give more than what we pray for. He is that unreservedly willing and receptive listener. He is a friend there who longs to loves us and to have us love Him. A prayer to such a friend is already one that is like banging on an opened door, or convincing a judge that is already in our favour. Secondly, God is not a reluctant neighbour, whose presence is just there but not approachable or non-negotiable. Importunity is a virtue of prayer. His silence was His blessing. From Romans 5:1-5, we can exult in our tribulation; knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint; because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us. The hope we have is in God and not the solution to the problem. HE knows what we want, and anticipates our prayers before we are beforehand, after passing the consideration / willingness barrier, to ask Him for the purpose of the prayers. A great guide I read and fully appreciate is how we pray from “I want” to “Lord, what do you want” to “I will!” I know personally I am still at the stage of “Lord, what do you want”. How I know and why do I know will relate to an article I read weeks after this, that I read at the same week as I write this long-due article. Be patient and let these words sink into your heart. Finally, the answer to our prayer is not just merely fulfilling the details of request of the prayer, the needs and the things. But He has more than that to give. He wants to give us Himself. As in Luke 11:13, I personally feel, we know about the trinity and give the Holy Spirit isn’t just like God giving himself to those who ask of him? Know beforehand, our prayer is not just getting God’s attention, but to appropriate God’s His attentiveness. The seeking period is the perfecting period as like Jacob, who prays not to want God for what he could do form him or the people, but want God for God himself. As what Mother Teresa have managed about prayer: Prayer enlarge the heart until it’s capable of containing God’s gift of Himself. All of life is prayer without ceasing. With knowing that prayer’s purpose to for God to give himself to us, lets us not distance away from prayer, but take prayer from a different perceptive, one that will change our heart for prayer and our willingness to pray…the joy of prayer, yup I praise God for that. How, thru his parable of humour, he speaks so deep of teachings he has for us, for his ultimate purpose for us, that is himself for us. How wonderful and gracious he is. : )

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D&D after D&D

DATE: 06/02/2005 09:53:21 AM

Beyond Duty to Delight Luke 17:1-10

A parable of the unworthy servant, unprofitable ones that are owned by God. He own everything of us, he owe us of nothing. Familiar systems of give and take may still be in our lives. Love to be loved, give to receive, work to be praised and paid handsomely can be part of our ethic. I’ll love you if-syndrome, encouraging people in keeping what we want from them, and the list goes on. Perhaps these are the things are very uncomfortable to mention, but one surprising thing I learnt from this book. They actually commented that thankfulness is actually a human response. Woah what a hard-hitting comment! I personally always think that thankfulness is appreciation what God have done in my life, or the things that God have allowed me, or called me to do. The duty of servanthood is actually not with divine expression of thankfulness, but it is a duty. A duty that comes with no special motivation for good but one that is common as breathing, eating and sleeping. It is also not serving a duty that helps us accumulate IOU from God. We are instead always in debt with HIM. How can we appreciate a work that is always in debt? A duty that is always of obedience? The answer is already given. Beyond duty to delight, an approach we can choose to adopt. Beyond the duty that we do to God who owns us, there is joy, with faith as is reward. As we do more of our duty to God, the more faith we cultivate and harvest. A faith knowing that God is in control of all, a God that owns us and know us well, a reward that accompany joy and delight that I, at this moment could say, only being it thru that one could fully understand what it fully truly means by beyond duty to delight. As much as we could serve and fulfil our duties with joy and delight, the unfinished tasks are usually faced in the gratitude for the finished gift of

Calvary

. A final question which I just like to bring forward is regarding the life of Job, someone that I always admire and imitated. In Job 1:9, KJV, Does Job fear God for nought? Which the real question is “Does Job fear God for God?” Using the same structure, I will try to ask, do we serve our duty for duty sake only? I am glad that now, I know what does duty means to me, duty just means a in very simple words that may not able to catch the whole spirit of it – doing for a friend called Jesus Christ who have already own us.

Finally, catching up my spiritual blog…with tons more to come…help help….help me lord….Learned some more stuff at Ps Ronald 144 regarding relationship, which will be shared when time allows and opportunity arise..

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A new step prepared by God

DATE: 05/30/2005 10:45:15 AM

A week have past, a week to Phuket, Khao Lak Thailand. A service-learning (SL) trip with Team Temasek, T2, with Temasek Secondary 3 students. A batch of exciting and interesting students that bring so much dynamics to the trip itself. As this is my second humanitarian-typed trip to Thailand, first being to Lampang, Chiangmai. This trip differs in terms of the role I played. In Chiangmai, I just played a worker role. In this trip, I played a facilitator role, to facilitate learning while serving. The most surprising thing is that I was among the team of 4, not SL trained, and neither CL trained or has any cell-leader blah blah blah experience. Thankful for a crashed course of 15+ minutes by Ps Lily at Macdonald, Parkway Builders enlightened me a little into the SL world. The 2 weeks runway was weeks of anxiety and heavily rely on the spirit……it was really taxing and draining for me….thank God there were no other issues on hand…no M S distraction (or I just too busy to be distracted by it). Thank God too that though with the stress that I strafe away from him at a moment, he allowed mi to recognized immediate return was applied. After that, anxiety was not longer in mind. ??? ?.... 2 Team meetings….but God is more than 2 (actually 3)…..so in every meeting, there were 7 present. So 7 brains at work. Short runway but all things in the all-knowing God. Upon the start of the trip, after having interacted with the students beforehand on Wednesday (thank God I was not working yeah), with that good impression in mind, it helped me to put more faith in the 4-team and also less tension = not strangle God too tightly…… hehe. The real thing comes to experience at the school. First night was quite neutral and haphazard, as didn’t really have a good satisfying ice-breaker, though the students were in very welcoming high note. Highly energetic, I begin to feel the 2x effect. But well, God is great and instil strength….though I am still that blur blur one. Upon arrival at the school……woah….after a long 1st night + debrief (double blessing) with minimal rest…….a school tour and a first meal at the school canteen. In the afternoon, work started. Glad that I am in the painting side……no need to sweat out…… shelter….laze off mi man. :p…. ….. But in all, the favour that I always like to do, affirming people…praising people. As much I could offer, as much I could help, conserve energy and observe more. Conserving energy for the night debrief is an important aspect for me, the focus of my service. My service this time is not primarily to help to paint the classroom, but to help the students learn and take home a lesson that they will remember and apply. Perhaps too focus on my service and narrow-minded, but interaction with the students was really a great joy. The different kind of students……silly ones, blur blur one, mad ones, honourable ones, rocky ones, initiative ones(easy to relate who they are and neither do I wanna to used coded msg)…..well….who will read this blog ho…..yeah yeah. ??..:) ;P wink wink …..fa tien. 3-4 hours rest everyday on hard ground…..yup have to admit that I am already……2x …but God is good, he brought mi thru these time. Yeah first team briefing = devotion for us…….all thanks Ps Lily…..mi no need to share word. Yeah yeah. Hehe . but anyway, it is tiring, physically, mentally, soul-ly and spiritually…thank God for his presence there with us and affirming his presence. It is another wonderful experience for me. Things I personally learnt, listen, watch, and be bold. Objective is to impact and impart life experience….for good and for good. One can give without caring, but one cannot care without giving. Getting back to shape is highest priority after the trip as I am trying to do now….updating blogs, reading the word, reading the book, praying more….tiding up lost prayer knots.. Prayer have being the sermon topics for the past 2 weeks already….woah. Prayer works….I remember one night, it was raining heavily…..then I started praying in tongues when waiting for YL and L to finish bathing….then once they are done…..the rain reduced to a light drizzle. Woah…..The move of God…what an affirmation. Also whatever high S, I, C, D blah blah blah, yeah mi high F….flexible yeah. It is great to have survive thru this….also to understand more about working with LC, and also building an easy working knowledge for future projects. A trip this is indeed one that make a difference in my life. After this trip…..woah a great opportunity for me to rely on God again…..as the previous encrypted msg was decoded, so this type I will use a different encryption code again…..for those who wish to challenge again…here it is ……a statement that I know….uhemm uhemmm….. “Wms zpb Q F zpc amknzrgyjc”, the essential key to the code is the person who made this comment. The system of encryption….sorry cant tell….but ask and it will be given to you. Happy decryption….but such a statement really have a great impact on me…..till now…..still have not fully breakthrough from such a statement….it is not to blame the person, but I believe this statement was God-allowed and God-still-in-control. Just the rest is up to me…..my surrendering and reliance on God’s grace……also had a great blessing and grace from God……surprising…..managed to call GG twice within 2 months…..a miracle to me that have not happened the past 2+ years ever since BU. And after each, was a peaceful, with God assuring presence. Just a normal chat…..Thank God….I know you are in control…you have what the best for me…I believe.

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All Glory to God

DATE: 05/22/2005 10:00:56 AM

All glory to God, the utmost high one. "To the measure of your faith, ask and it will be given". He is really a God of provision. Thank God that he knows my heart and his ways is always the best. He could provide without me interfering. The details of this can’t be provide as I am not sure who will be reading this blog….thus it will to be classified…..if you wanna to find out….just ask me and I will tell you the details…share with you full details of the grace of God and his hand upon it. Secondly, my mum just came back from encounter weekend, 20 – 22 May with a harvest and blessing. Thank God for such a refreshing and renewing moment and hope. So assuring and a great blessing. Thirdly, the CIP-attachment with Temasek Sec……woah….a SL project but mi not SL trained. But HE is a God of provision….thank God that at this very moment I am still managing okay with all the information…but I know, this trip, God will be doing a new work in me, removing my fear of chairing / leading a group of people, to regain freedom in this area and be used by him for his glory to serve his people. Lastly, update regarding M S issue. Thank God, even since, things have being quiet. Called a count of few “few few” times, but with peace and discipline with my words. Also an issue that is outside this as I remember…….yeah lesser Cold jokes I think……but still have….or I am just no aware of them…….oh boy….but anyway….God is in control….and I know God is doing a new work in me……and prayer works too. I can see….I remember praying for her on for a few day…..then something happened……… “Encoded Msg for secrecy Me shy…..how to break code, ask mi” (H Rdd gdq nm sgd mdws c@x vhsgnts dudm jmnvhmf vg@s shld rgd vhkk ad hm rbgnnk @mc vgdqd vhkk rgd ad, sgntfg h jmnv gdq dw@l udmtd. Vn@g..g@c ktmbg vhsg lx eqhdmcr @s @qs b@msddm.sgdm..r@v gdq nm lx v@x nts..ats sg@mj Fnc, l@m@fdc sn g@ud @ bg@s vhsg gdq, jmnvhmf sg@s h @l mns @kknvdc sn op@x enq gdq dudm h vhrg sn.) God you are really so amazing. Prayer works. Pray Until Something Happens. Push on with prayer I will. Thank God for such a opportunity. A period of learning and knowing more about his grace for me. A really faithful servant of God M S is indeed. Anyway, time seems to packed for the last week or so and I have hard time catching my spiritual blog and this personal blog, but I believe as time passes, especially after my Thailand trip, and the things that God ask mi to ask him again after the trip, more secret and blessing he may reveal to me….yeah yeah…..all glory to God. Sorry regarding the code as the event will be obvious and significant. Ask mi how to break the code….perhaps make it a challenge….it is a very direct easy code to break…..simple encryption system….no one to make a C program or java program for mi to encrypt message quickly and easily……..one last words……..God is good and he is doing a great work within me…..I am just excited. And grapping him more tightly than before…………Haha……I am not going to let you go this time……

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Christians with a Tang

DATE: 05/11/2005 12:50:37 AM

Christians with a Tang- Luke 14:25-35

Tang, initially I not very sure it means, but after checking the dictionary as I believe the word have its applicable meaning. Indeed it is, from the dictionary, the meaning of tang is strong taste or smell; the very appropriate word to use for the topic item, salt. Salt, something we know in life, a seasoning, and a word that embeds many mystery of life as salt is being used in NT.

There are nine ingredients of salt that are evident as I read the book. I will briefly, due to my laziness, summarise all nine. Firstly we have to recognise that life comes from Christ himself. There are many ways to see this fact, but from the way I personally interpret, one knows that Christ is the way to our Heavenly Father, the place to eternity. Salt in life, is an essential mineral. I shall not elaborate too much too spoilt the joy of seeking the full meaning of salt, the salt that brings life.

Secondly, salt can penetrates. Salt can penetrate through membrane. Too, we know, salt is added to food before it is cooked and after. If salt is added after, we will only taste the salt first and not the food. If salt is added before, the salt will penetrate the food, and the result is not longer the taste of salt but the favour of salt-penetrated food.

Thirdly, the cross is the power of salty tang. The cross itself is already very self-explanatory. Oppss…hehe I am just a bit lazy! Salt have to “die” = disappear to allow its target to be favoured.

Fourthly, as a tangy Christian is one who is unreservedly dependent on Christ’s resources to meet Christ’s challenges, as salt is unreservedly dependent on its source, to meets its challenge. Salt, as we know, comes from the sea, and only after vaporisation of the water, then the salt will remain. The source, heat energy from sun energy, the sun is what we can said to be created by God. As for what challenges come awaits the salt, many mystery are waiting out there

Fifthly, a salty saint is a source of courage in life’s battles. Salt is a mineral that is contained in the isotonic drinks, essential and source of energy for a person preparing for a challenge. Similarly, this can be applied to the salt of our life.

Sixth, the people who are the salt of the earth are no longer possessed by their possession. As salt originate from the sea, a salt is surround by water molecules to be solvated in the sea water. Solvated = surrounded, to be integrated with the water. But when one becomes the salt of the earth, the water must leave the all-round blockage and leave the salt, not possessed by the water. Hope you are able to see what does the salt and water molecules role as related to life.

Seventh, the salt of the earth is replenishable. What is the earth made up of, rock; what is the rock made up of, mineral salt; as salt is lost to flowing water, salt is too deposited from the waves on the sea. This is related to the eight point which is we are constantly refilled with discernment and wisdom beyond our own ability. We know when the salt is lost, but does not really know where the salt that was replenished came from. All I know is The Lord is the source, the mediator of it. He knows and directs things far more profound that what I could comprehend and understand and do.

Lastly, once coupled with enthusiasm is humour. Taking Lord seriously, so we don’t have to take ourselves and life so seriously. All nine ingredients of salt, of being from the Lord’s flavour, seasoning and zest, let them be evident in us. The quality and quantity of our humour reflects how serious our life, a life that God already planned it well……so lets enjoy it as we serve God joyfully and in us, the salt of God be there.

While at the Banquet, Come to the Banquet

DATE: 05/07/2005 09:15:39 PM

Another parable that almost made me has indigestion. Here is it as I present:

Isn’t it frightening to be at the banquet but yet still need another invitation to the banquet? To be at a place but not know what is the purpose to be there, the purpose of the banquet and only present at the banquet by the mind is somewhere else. From the parable of the Great Feast, Luke 14: 1-24, looking in depth to v 18-20, we can see that there are three reasons that draws the people from the banquet.

First, the excuse of needing to see the land bought. Material possession is the reason for what we have may be obstacle for us to get close to God. Remember in Psalms 24 that everything on earth belongs to God. The things that God bless us are the token of things that will be offered in heaven. Purchase of land without seeing it is weird due to the importance of the purchase. So hmmmmm…not attending the banquet due to that may speak some more.

Secondly, 5 Yokes of oxen = ten oxen. Trying them out?? The job that is supposing at those times to be done by his servant….he goes try them out…!!... Great wealth. The riches of earth will not last…..as God have written in the Bible….for his Word will last forever.

Lastly, Married a wife and cant’ come. Indeed a very good reason. Even can be backed up with Deuteronomy 24:5. Family, relationship, both are important and importance being mentioned in the bible. However, is God before family or family before God? A question with simple words but a difficult approach. I will approach in this way, the balance way, God’s family. Married a wife and unable to make it for the banquet is a valid reason which illuminates the main issue of these there points – The heart.

In the end, the banquet would not be empty of the invited guest, but to be filled with whomever appreciates, whoever that comes with the desire.

Thus with a swift way of trying to conclude this, let us be the invited guest and know what the purpose of the banquet is. Be aware and sensitive for any invitation may be one that is Spirit-led. Let enjoy the waiting and the opportunity that comes upon when at the banquet. For come to the banquet and be at the banquet.

Know what you want and wanting what you know

DATE: 05/06/2005 07:58:25 AM

Without reading through all the required readings, stepping out of the house towards a history paper was one that I have no idea what to expect. Looking at the past 2 papers, it was informative but yet only exposed the inadequacy of my ability to have an organized essay reply to the question. Upon looking at the comments of my essay only deepened the doubts and increase the anxiety. But thank God today reading title – Know what you want and wanting what you know. Objective is the key word that illuminate instantly.

Sometimes our life we live are one that is without a clear objective. If we know what we want to do, we will be free from all the temptation of others and only head towards the one objective. Freedom, come forth from having a God-given purpose in life; can be obtain if we take God seriously. He wants nothing less of our life, not for him to enjoy, but for him to help us, transform us to be more Christ-like; for his glory and a taste of heaven on earth. As in LOR, Gandalf spoke to Bilbo Baggins that he is not present to steal but all he wants is to help him.

God, the Lord of new beginning. A new beginning usually brings new hope. Why not let the observation of the minor details of life bring great wisdom for in Jeremiah 29:11-13 can lead us to think, instead of playing game, having a game plan for a truly exciting life will be a better attraction.

Reflect back, how many times we really know what we want and wanting what we know. When are the times did we take God seriously at the things we want or do. Lets not be dishearten as God is here is help. HE is indeed here to help.

To do Cold or Hot

DATE: 05/04/2005 05:07:23 AM

There are pleny plenty of things that can be blog, but firstly hi hi to all.....this is the first personal blog, after finished typing my spiritual blog. I will try to update both blogs as often as I can, but the spiritual one will have more data as it is more easily to extract data from Holy spirit to type in than me trying to type in the data from my personal life which sometimes have to go thru filtering as I am not sure who will be looking at my blog at this moment and I have not figured out the way to have "view restriction"

Starting off, coldness and hotness. After today comments, wonder should I start learning some hot words instead of freeze-biting words that send shivers done people spines. Thoughts and thoughts, that seemingly filles my life and maybe the kick start of this blog...an archive of my thoughts....which should in ways become an archive of my activity reports. = Online diary?? not sure at this moment with my brain in trembling with 2 issues in hand....I called "M S" issue and Singapore military history exam. "M S" issue have being mention to certain people.....of course my spiritual father (SpF) knows about it. M S is really a hot and cold issue. But I know that God is in control. God knows my heart despite all my hidden agenda and blah blah blah....but I desire most is his presence. Isa 30:15-27.... a word given by my SpF, I believe God is dealing with the idols of my life. Ever since 2001, there are "idols" erected in my life due to a breakup. Even before that, some "idols" already existed. In any way, M S, is really something that I believe will continue, and also I learnt a number of things of myself and how God speaks and how doubtful I can be......currently

Name 1 issue for example, only when a comment of coldness was mentioned, then I realise why God wants me to offer a word of apology and a word of thanksgiving to M S. Unfortunately, due to delay, I missed the opportunity. Timing! Timing! To go through M S really takes mi walk even closer to God. From my point of view, other whom get to know what M S exactly means, a word of warning, knowing M S will requires a greater part of your side to grap hold of God...why? The reason behind is due to an event that the details on the hands of 2 people, SpF and BY. If you need to know, please pray hard and just merely due to curiosity enter the field of my unknowing world. Codenaming it KHB2003, it took me 1 year to overcome the aftermath effect and all the adjustment, and now, I still suffer abit of the remanents of it. The factors of this issue are different for the breakup, thus measures have not being full erected and the issue not fully resolved with complete satisfaction.

2. my vulneability in such a area as involved is M S is still prevailing despite ...... concurrent with the personal goal that I wrote down in my Dream on Book, it is a tough area for me mah. But thank God with the prayer that I made....disrupt anything that is not of you......guess I am one that really can eat vinegar.......not good not good.....better change man.

Blank mind with reluctant offer of cold jokes...only dumb ideas filled mi.......bad thoughts that required "in name of Jesus I reject ...."......quite tiring but the more they come,....the more I will squeeze the juice out of God.

A few lingering thgts......should I just give....or wait for God's sign....I know why I said to the measure of faith ask and it will be given.....a buffer zone before both I had to compremise. Sorry God.

M S, how it will progress.......well, guess I have typed too much for the day and many many more to come.......long blogger mi.....oh boy....very L S me . Long-winded. Should cut short.........

I like this concluding act of statement:

May I so cold that I can say only cold jokes.......do I need to be starting warming up for warm jokes..(oppssss that go me again....sigh)

HaHa.....I guess I am going crazy....help