Most men naturally assume that it’s the MAN who must pursue the woman. But guys who are naturals at succeeding with women don’t buy into this belief -- and it’s a big part of why they’re always with the most attractive women. What would your life be like if instead of chasing women, women chased you? Here are 10 tips to shift the dynamic in your favor and get women tripping over themselves for a space on your social calendar.
Number 10
Use “reverse rapport”“Reverse rapport” is when you say and do the opposite of what a guy would do when he’s trying to make a woman like him… but in a sarcastic, overly serious way that assumes the woman already knows, likes and trusts you. The objective here is NOT to try to be sweet and wonderful and nice in order to win her approval. How do you do this? Well, one way is to use a sarcastic comment that’s the OPPOSITE of what a woman wants to hear. Or answer a question a woman asks you with an answer that’s the opposite of what she expects, all in a very sarcastic tone that implies you’re making fun of her. When you do, you’ll create a deep, polarity-charged connection with her that will get her pursuing you in no time flat.
Number 9
Read between the linesIf you’re talking to a woman on the phone and she tells you that she’s seeing someone, understand that she’s saying this more for herself than for you. She probably is casually dating another guy, but she’s feeling attracted to you, so she needs to say this to put on the brakes so she doesn’t feel “promiscuous.” If you find yourself in this situation, tell her something challenging like “Yeah, congratulations… and you know, that’s pretty assumptive thinking that I was trying to pursue you.” She won’t know what to say, and you will have communicated that you’re a confident guy who doesn’t need any woman -- just the kind of guy women LOVE. Don’t be surprised if she calls you back within a week, telling you she wants to get together and that she’s suddenly dumped the guy she was dating (for a chance to get to know you, of course).
Number 8
See beyond getting laidWhen I first started learning how to succeed with women and dating, the idea of getting laid was a lot more interesting to me than it is now because I thought that if you could learn how to “get laid” then you’d naturally be able to have any other kind of success you wanted with women. Well, many of the guys I’ve met who are GREAT at “getting laid” don’t have any idea how to find a high-quality woman to have a great relationship with and when they do find one, they have no idea how to keep her around. I think it’s much more interesting and useful to learn how and why women become attracted to men, and why they STAY attracted. This way, you’ll be able to keep that fantastic woman in your life once you find her. There’s nothing wrong with “getting laid,” but it’s only a tiny piece of the puzzle, and it alone won’t lead you to happiness and success in life.More tips to keep her interested…
Number 7
Stop courting, start attractingThere are two basic models for how men approach meeting women: the courtship model, and the attraction model. If you base your approach with women on ATTRACTION, you get a very different response from COURTING them. When you court a woman, her natural response is to run, which makes you want her more and makes her run more. But when you attract a woman, her natural response is to chase YOU. This subtlety makes all the difference in the world.
Number 6
Be the dominant oneCourting is based on what you DO, what you OFFER, and what you GIVE… and is largely based on gifts, dinners, flowers, compliments, etc. Attraction is based on how you communicate, who you are and your masculine identity. Courting takes the “make friends” strategy and supersizes it; it’s about being as nice as possible in order to get her to like you. Attraction isn’t concerned with “liking” because a woman doesn’t need to like you in order to feel attracted to you. Courting is facing the challenge; attraction is BEING the challenge. Courting is about being a follower, submissive and weak; attraction is about being a leader, dominant and strong. Stop courting, start attracting, and you won’t BELIEVE how it can transform your success with women.
Number 5
Show her you get itWomen will act completely different around you and treat you very differently if you’re a guy who “gets it.” The way to show her you’re one of these rare guys is to see when she’s testing you and keep your cool. So if she mentions that other men are interested in her or she says she’s unavailable or she complains about something you do, realize it’s just a test. Then simply say, “Hey, stop that stuff,” and she’ll know what you mean. More importantly, she’ll know she’s dealing with a real man, and she’ll stop at no expense to chase you down.
Number 4
Stay on your own courseMost men orient themselves by following and seeking approval of the woman. She leads, they follow; in fact, she isn’t even leading, but the man tries to convince her to lead with questions and body language that seek approval. This is a horrible mistake, and annoys women to no end. Instead, stay on your course, even when she’s all over the map. Let her reorient her body, behavior, moods, and responses to YOURS. Don’t ever try to get her to lead. Show her you’re the kind of man who loves to be the captain of your own ship, and she’ll feel an undeniable attraction to you.The top three ways to get her knocking at your door…
Number 3
Never backpedal or explain yourselfIf you say or do something that seems to upset a woman, don’t try to explain your way out of it or do something to “make her feel better.” Don’t act like you screwed up or show her that you’re nervous just because she’s acting upset. Just move on as if nothing happened. Get right on to the next topic or story. If she stays on it, whines or complains, just say “Get over it, it was a joke, stop being a pain,” and then get on to the next topic again. If you try to backpedal or explain yourself or in any way hint that you think you’ve “screwed up,” you’re DEAD MEAT. If you say something and she doesn’t like it, that’s not YOUR problem. Women often complain to see if they can manipulate you with their emotions, and when you show you don’t fall for this, her respect and ATTRACTION for you will go through the roof.
Number 2
Hint that you’re normalThere are a lot of psycho, perverted and “mentally unstable” guys out there, so it’s important you communicate through your behavior that you’re NOT one of them. Tell a woman you’re busy, and get off the phone WITHOUT asking her to meet for a date. Make fun of dumb-ass behavior, and other guys who act like wussies. If she calls but doesn’t leave a message, accuse her of being a stalker, and tell her that normal people leave messages. Chase women out of your house; say “get out” over and over again if she’s kissing you. All of this gives her subtle signs that you’re not some freak who desperately wants to get in her pants. This will give her an irresistible craving to get to know you better because you’re so different from the typical needy guys she dates.
Number 1
Use her own games on herWe all know women love playing games. But when you turn the tables and play games on a woman, it shifts the power dynamic in your favor. One of my favorite games to play with women is “You’re a brat, and I’m fake exasperated.” That’s pretty self-explanatory. Some others are “Let’s see who can act the least interested,” and “I’m hard to get, and you love me.” Have fun playing these games with a woman and you’ll soon find that she won’t be able to get enough of your challenging, confident personality.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating_top_ten_150/168_dating_list.html
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Top 10: Signs She’s Not Interested
There are literally billions of single women out there at the moment. Go ahead, add them up. Billions. Have you ever wasted time, money and oxygen on one that you never even had a chance with? Of course you didn’t realize it at the time, but yeah, you probably have. And the really annoying thing is that all the clues were right there in front of you, but you didn’t acknowledge them because you were so focused on the prize.Well, you never need to make that mistake again, because we’re here to spell out the top 10 signs she’s not interested in you. Sure, it’s a hard thing to accept, but you’ll be much better off if you can spot these signs early on. You’ll also need to consider that these signs may come to you at any stage of the courtship: the day you ask her out, on the first date or perhaps even a few dates in. When any one of these signs she’s not interested do creep up, it should be your cue to move along and set your sights on one of the other billion girls out there.Here they are, the top 10 signs she’s not interested in you:
Number 10
She declines an invitationEven once is not OK. Maybe her story about a busy schedule is true, but unless she's going into the hospital to have a kidney transplant that evening, a girl is going to find a way to go out with a guy she’s interested in. We’re not saying that you need to give up on this girl if she turns you down once, but you may need to prepare yourself for an uphill struggle to win her affection.
Number 9
She hasn’t introduced her friendsWhen it comes to dating, most girls want the approval of their friends. If, after several dates, she still hasn’t tried to exhibit you to one or more of her friends, it means she doesn’t expect any type of romantic relationship develop. She might be spending time with you because she has no better alternatives at the moment, but take her “secrecy” about you as one of her signs she’s not interested.
Number 8
She always brings her friendsConversely, if you can’t get this girl to come out for some one-on-one time, there’s obviously something wrong. There’s very little room for romantic maneuvering when she has her friends in tow, which is why this is one of the signs she’s not interested in you. If she never gives you the opportunity to get close, she’s probably happy with the distance between you.
Number 7
She talks about other menUnless it’s Brad Pitt, or someone equally famous and unattainable, her talk about other men should cause you some concern. This girl’s clearly on the lookout for someone besides you, and this is a not-so-subtle way of letting you know that. The jealousy angle should not be coming into play in the early stages of a relationship -- there’s plenty of time for that later. Furthermore, if she has the nerve to ask you for relationship advice, she has likely placed you in the “trusted male friend” category. Either that or she’s already playing mind games with you, which is a big red flag -- thankfully, you can recognize this as a sign she’s not interested.
Number 6
She pays more attention to other men (in a group setting)In this scenario, you begin the night as a couple and end up with a group -- at a club or something -- and she spends more time talking to another guy. Unless it’s her brother or business partner, you should be concerned. Not only is she willing to risk losing you to other girls, but she also doesn’t really care about appearing rude. Sure, she may run back to you when it’s time to collect the coats and arrange the cabs home, but it’s clear that her heart isn’t in it, and you should probably cut her loose at this point.A lot of men don’t understand the signs she’s not interested…
Number 5
She avoids intimate settingsWhere she chooses to meet you says a lot. There’s a huge difference between a quiet dinner for two and coffee at lunch. If you ask her out for a romantic dinner and she suggests a lunch date, it might mean that she doesn’t want you to get the impression that your friendship is leading anywhere, particularly the bedroom. Take this avoidance for what it’s worth: it's one of her signs she’s not interested.
Number 4
She hasn’t come near youWhether it’s by conscious decision or not, if she hasn’t made any sort of physical contact with you, such as a brush on the arm or a pat on the thigh, she may have already counted you out of the race. It’s said that women generally know within a few minutes of meeting a man whether they’ll go to bed with him, and if there’s no incidental contact within in the first couple of meetings, the chemistry’s probably not there and she knows it.
Number 3
She doesn't engage in body languageThe body language of a woman who is attracted to you is a telltale sign of interest. Does she play with her hair, mirror your gestures, sit up straight and generally try to look her best around you? No? Then she’s sending out signs she’s not interested.
Number 2
She plays up other girlsThis clue is as blatant as they come, yet men fail to read into this correctly. Unlike men, girls are constantly trying to set up their single friends, especially if they think you’d be a good match. When the girl you think you’re seeing starts to big up a single friend and asks you what you think about her, she’s more than likely trying to shake you off.
Number 1
She doesn’t return your callsPlease, for your sake, take this as one of the major signs she’s not interested and not as an amusing game of cat and mouse. Don’t assume that she lost your number, that she tried to call but the line was busy or any other delusional rubbish like that. There’s nothing sadder than a guy who refuses to take a hint; don’t be him. Sure, you’re thinking: Some girls like persistent men. True, but they won’t really respect these men in the end. Don’t get played like this.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating_150/199_dating_list.html
Number 10
She declines an invitationEven once is not OK. Maybe her story about a busy schedule is true, but unless she's going into the hospital to have a kidney transplant that evening, a girl is going to find a way to go out with a guy she’s interested in. We’re not saying that you need to give up on this girl if she turns you down once, but you may need to prepare yourself for an uphill struggle to win her affection.
Number 9
She hasn’t introduced her friendsWhen it comes to dating, most girls want the approval of their friends. If, after several dates, she still hasn’t tried to exhibit you to one or more of her friends, it means she doesn’t expect any type of romantic relationship develop. She might be spending time with you because she has no better alternatives at the moment, but take her “secrecy” about you as one of her signs she’s not interested.
Number 8
She always brings her friendsConversely, if you can’t get this girl to come out for some one-on-one time, there’s obviously something wrong. There’s very little room for romantic maneuvering when she has her friends in tow, which is why this is one of the signs she’s not interested in you. If she never gives you the opportunity to get close, she’s probably happy with the distance between you.
Number 7
She talks about other menUnless it’s Brad Pitt, or someone equally famous and unattainable, her talk about other men should cause you some concern. This girl’s clearly on the lookout for someone besides you, and this is a not-so-subtle way of letting you know that. The jealousy angle should not be coming into play in the early stages of a relationship -- there’s plenty of time for that later. Furthermore, if she has the nerve to ask you for relationship advice, she has likely placed you in the “trusted male friend” category. Either that or she’s already playing mind games with you, which is a big red flag -- thankfully, you can recognize this as a sign she’s not interested.
Number 6
She pays more attention to other men (in a group setting)In this scenario, you begin the night as a couple and end up with a group -- at a club or something -- and she spends more time talking to another guy. Unless it’s her brother or business partner, you should be concerned. Not only is she willing to risk losing you to other girls, but she also doesn’t really care about appearing rude. Sure, she may run back to you when it’s time to collect the coats and arrange the cabs home, but it’s clear that her heart isn’t in it, and you should probably cut her loose at this point.A lot of men don’t understand the signs she’s not interested…
Number 5
She avoids intimate settingsWhere she chooses to meet you says a lot. There’s a huge difference between a quiet dinner for two and coffee at lunch. If you ask her out for a romantic dinner and she suggests a lunch date, it might mean that she doesn’t want you to get the impression that your friendship is leading anywhere, particularly the bedroom. Take this avoidance for what it’s worth: it's one of her signs she’s not interested.
Number 4
She hasn’t come near youWhether it’s by conscious decision or not, if she hasn’t made any sort of physical contact with you, such as a brush on the arm or a pat on the thigh, she may have already counted you out of the race. It’s said that women generally know within a few minutes of meeting a man whether they’ll go to bed with him, and if there’s no incidental contact within in the first couple of meetings, the chemistry’s probably not there and she knows it.
Number 3
She doesn't engage in body languageThe body language of a woman who is attracted to you is a telltale sign of interest. Does she play with her hair, mirror your gestures, sit up straight and generally try to look her best around you? No? Then she’s sending out signs she’s not interested.
Number 2
She plays up other girlsThis clue is as blatant as they come, yet men fail to read into this correctly. Unlike men, girls are constantly trying to set up their single friends, especially if they think you’d be a good match. When the girl you think you’re seeing starts to big up a single friend and asks you what you think about her, she’s more than likely trying to shake you off.
Number 1
She doesn’t return your callsPlease, for your sake, take this as one of the major signs she’s not interested and not as an amusing game of cat and mouse. Don’t assume that she lost your number, that she tried to call but the line was busy or any other delusional rubbish like that. There’s nothing sadder than a guy who refuses to take a hint; don’t be him. Sure, you’re thinking: Some girls like persistent men. True, but they won’t really respect these men in the end. Don’t get played like this.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating_150/199_dating_list.html
Top 10: More Signs You've Been Single Too Long
There is a certain luxurious freedom that comes with being single; you are free to do whatever you like, come and go as please, and you answer to no one. But indulging in that independence for too long can change a man, and usually not for the better. Bad bachelor habits can quickly become second nature and you can lose your motivation or, even worse, your edge. Like a job applicant with gaps in his resume, your periods of “liberty” raise big red flags with potential partners. Being single for too long is a downward spiral that can leave a guy sad, lonely and celibate.We’ve all seen dudes start to slide down this slippery slope, and it ain’t pretty -- because of this we've already looked the Top 10 Signs You've Been Single Too Long. And it's a little disheartening that we have to revisit the topic, but it seems we need to once again look at the top 10 clear signs that might mean you’ve been single a little too long -- heed the warning. If some of them hit close to home, it’s probably time to reevaluate. Unless, of course, a future filled with long, lonely nights eating pork rinds while watching scrambled porn with your obese cat sounds good.
No.10 - You assume you repulse all women
When a girl walks by and smiles, most guys take it as an ego-boosting compliment. However, being single for a prolonged period can start to wear on your confidence. Before you know it you start assuming these flirtatious glances are really smirks at your expense, probably aimed at your frumpy hair or bad outfit.Confidence is one of the most important things a girl looks for in a guy. Losing confidence often happens when you are out of the game for too long, and attracting anyone (let alone someone you are actually interested in) will be difficult.
No.9 - You develop bad eating habits
It takes a lot of effort to cook for one, and falling into the age-old trap of eating like a bachelor is easy. It’s also really unhealthy and kind of gross. If your cupboards are filled with food that can be cooked in less than five minutes, you’ve probably been on your own for too long.It doesn’t take much to set you on the right path. Head to the grocery store for a big order and shop for the basics like rice and pasta, pick up a spice rack and invest in cookbooks that specialize in simple meals for one. It might be easier to just pop a dinner into the microwave, but when it comes time to cook for a potential girlfriend Hungry-Man Classic Fried Chicken Dinner isn’t going to cut it. Practice the art of cooking and your dry spell will end faster than you can boil up some Kraft Minute Rice.
No.8 - You gush about your feelings to women
What’s another sure sign that you’ve been single for too long? You answer your female acquaintances’ small talk questions like, “How are you doing?” with long, emotional diatribes on your lonely single life. Even that cute barista making your morning coffee can be overwhelmed with deep, personal insights as you desperately search for some female compassion.You shouldn’t bottle up all those sentiments, just learn to pick and choose who hears them and when you let them out. See a shrink or call your mom, but just make sure you don’t try to woo a girl with your emotional ramblings.
No.7 - Your dating standards plummet
It would seem that going without action for too long lets certain chemicals build up in a man’s brain. Because much like beer, the concentration can build up and soon enough the dumpy girl down at the video store or the 40-year-old cougar at your local watering hole starts to look pretty damn good.It’s important to be conscious of this transformation. Failing to do so can result in being stuck in a relationship with the kind of girl who would normally make you shudder. Worse yet, you’re then blacklisted as the guy who once dated the bucktoothed, moustachioed, hobbit girl. Keep your chin and your standards up, and the right girl will come along.
No.6 - You get a cat
It’s perfectly reasonable for anyone forced to go without companionship for a long stretch of time to seek friendship in a pet. But before you go running off to the pet store in search of camaraderie, there is one immutable fact you need to consider: Girls think that guys who own cats are weird.Instead, consider getting a dog. They’re cute, loyal and seldom nag you to get your feet off the table or put out the garbage. Better yet, Fido acts like a veritable chick magnet and will help bust you out of your rut quicker than you can say, “Fetch.”
No.5 - You surf mail-order bride sites "out of curiosity"
Envisioning a lonely, solitary future can drive some men to take very desperate measures like ordering a bride off the internet rather than facing the prospect of cooking and cleaning for themselves forever.Stay in a slump long enough and you might justify having a little look around on one of these sites. “How bad could it be?” you might say. “She’ll be grateful for all I’ve done for her, she won’t know anyone here so she won’t leave me, and if she is even half as good-looking as this picture, I’m set!” This kind of rationale will inevitably leave you trapped in a dead-end relationship, heartbroken, that much poorer, and quite possibly the laughing stock of your community.
No.4 - You look at female friends as potential girlfriends
Complete strangers are ignoring your advances, speed dating takes too long, your computer is too slow for internet dating; so what’s left? Your friends, of course. They like you enough to hang out once in a while, so is it such a stretch to take it to the next level?In most cases, the answer is yes. The girlfriend boat sailed away long ago and she probably looks at you more like a brother than a potential bed buddy. Not only that, but chances are you haven’t been on your best behavior around her in the past, so all that farting, sexist humor and whoring around you’ve done in her presence gives you quite a bit of baggage to start off with. It’s understandable that you would start to consider these girls as potential girlfriends, but you are probably much better off keeping them as girl friends.
No.3 - You play too many video games
Hey, getting your fill of video games while you are single is a good idea. When you do eventually hook up with a girl there’s a good chance your gaming days are over. However, putting in endless hours of Wii antics a night is bad for your body, your brain and your chances of ever getting laid again.It isn’t just video games that single guys will overdose on: It’s easy for bachelors to fall into the boozing, sports-watching, golfing-any-time-you-want lifestyle that drives girls crazy. It’s hard to break these hedonistic ways, but these are the sacrifices you’ll have to make if you don’t want to end up sad and alone.
No.2 - You consider your mother's dating advice
It is hard-coded in a mother’s DNA to try and help their single sons find a date. Unfortunately, that usually involves her best friend’s hairdresser’s cousin who ends up being a hefty, hairy spinster with buzzing ovaries. So, relenting to mommy’s matchmaking prowess is definitely a step backward.That isn’t to say you should completely ignore this rich source of potential girlfriends. Instead, give your mom a list of attributes you look for in a girl and let her use that to judge her extended network of ladies accordingly. This way, your mother still gets to meddle in your love life without wasting your time or the time of her cousin’s therapist’s 300-pound, bowlegged sister.
No.1 - You Google old flames
Thanks to the internet, a quick little snapshot of just about anyone’s life can be found simply by Googling their name. So if you find yourself up late at night typing an ex-girlfriend's name into the search box, wondering what she's been up to and hoping maybe, just maybe, you guys could work out your decade-old differences, you should stop immediately and take a long, cold shower.More recently, networking sites like Facebook and MySpace have taken cyber-stalking to a whole new level. These personal-page sites offer a glimpse into your exes’ social life complete with pictures, diaries and more. It’s OK to look (morbid fascination is only human), but don’t attempt to contact her unless you don’t mind being tagged a shameless, creepy stalker.
Top 10: Signs You're Too Good For Her
The only thing worse than having a job is looking for a job. Much the same can be said about dating. Men too often put up with a lot of crap from women just to save having to start looking again. In our minds, that shouldn't be the case. The longer a man is in this situation, the more he will grow accustomed to the drudgery, leading him to stay in the relationship far longer than its expiration date.Whether you suspect that you’re in this situation or you know it for a fact, we’re here to introduce you to the top 10 signs you’re too good for her -- and really need to find someone better.
No.10 - You're always dumbing down conversations around her
And it's not just her -- it's her entire social universe. Her friends, her family and her coworkers all seem to have an extremely limited vocabulary, one that contains more four-letter expletives than a U.S. Army boot camp. If your cat can match her wit, it’s one of the signs you’re too good for her.
No.9 - She f*cks like a porn star
Sure, we all have those fantasies, but if your woman is taking you into uncharted territory that has serious repercussions for personal safety, there's a good chance it's a sign you're too good for her. No limits or boundaries in the intimate sphere means serious problems with self-respect and control in general. Sure the sex will be mind-blowing, but you’ll never know where she’s been or even how she learned her maneuvers, which can only mean one thing…
No.8 - None of your friends like her
Your friends don't like her and they seem to have independently verified, double-blind proof, that she's awful. You've spent a lot of time cultivating your social circle to serve as just this type of guard when you're in completely over your head, so trust your safety net. If she can't make simple conversation with your friends, it's a sign you're too good for her.
No.7 - You're always encouraging her
If, on a regular basis, you find yourself encouraging your girlfriend to go out and really experience life outside the couch or mall, you're in all likelihood too good for her. There are certain people for whom ambition or enthusiasm for the future are just plain anathema. You're not going to be her catalyst and all you're doing now is wasting valuable energy and focus that you should be spending on your own life.Move on.
No.6 - She can't pay for anything
When it comes time to pick up the check for a dinner, a movie or just about anything else the two of you are undertaking she is nowhere to be found. There are two types of women for whom this is a problem: The first is just oblivious to the fact that she should actually pitch into the relationship. The second is just without the ability and just doesn't seem to have any income. Life's too short to waste time on either of them.
No.5 - She's amazed by what you take for granted
At a certain point in life, certain realities set in and some things are just taken for granted. After college, a paycheck certainly falls into this category. If your girlfriend is dumbstruck by your ability to garner income, you're staring into the abyss of someone who cannot hold a job. This may be a warning sign of future problems.Other things that she’s awestruck by include paying bills, utilities or credit cards on a monthly basis. These should all let you know you're too good for her.
No.4 - She has poor hygiene
If you've noticed on numerous occasions that there is a certain unpleasant odor emanating from your betrothed, it may be time to move on. Some people are merely untidy while others endanger your health. You can try mentioning in passing that there seems to be something amiss, but by and large, you're going to be facing a recurring and uphill battle if you want her to change.
No.3 - She is devoid of natural curiosity
The universe is a strange and mysterious place. Every day you come across phenomena that nearly cry out for further explanation. At least you thought so, until you met your current girlfriend. If you've been together for a while and you've never heard her mention travel or a book she has read, you're in trouble. Conversations based upon first-hand experience from your day are both powerfully limiting and dull.
No.2 - She gets into trouble with the law
There is a time when authority figures are challenged and boundaries are defined. It's called adolescence. It's when your juvenile record can be sealed and expunged. If she's still shoplifting or finding herself on the business side of a DUI conviction, that's just reckless and is endangering your future. It shows that she hasn't developed a sense of what is right or wrong, nor does she have any respect for the possessions of others.
No.1 - Her best asset is her looks
Relationships are a growing concern. You're supposed to find other qualities that endear her to you beyond the initial physical attraction. If you haven't found anything like that and in fact have found many qualities that the good looks are covering up for, then you're too good for her. You need to move on and find someone else. If you don't, you're selling yourself short. Strike out in a new direction and find someone who is both physically attractive as well as your equal or better in the other 98% of life.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-signs-youre-too-good-for-her.html
No.10 - You're always dumbing down conversations around her
And it's not just her -- it's her entire social universe. Her friends, her family and her coworkers all seem to have an extremely limited vocabulary, one that contains more four-letter expletives than a U.S. Army boot camp. If your cat can match her wit, it’s one of the signs you’re too good for her.
No.9 - She f*cks like a porn star
Sure, we all have those fantasies, but if your woman is taking you into uncharted territory that has serious repercussions for personal safety, there's a good chance it's a sign you're too good for her. No limits or boundaries in the intimate sphere means serious problems with self-respect and control in general. Sure the sex will be mind-blowing, but you’ll never know where she’s been or even how she learned her maneuvers, which can only mean one thing…
No.8 - None of your friends like her
Your friends don't like her and they seem to have independently verified, double-blind proof, that she's awful. You've spent a lot of time cultivating your social circle to serve as just this type of guard when you're in completely over your head, so trust your safety net. If she can't make simple conversation with your friends, it's a sign you're too good for her.
No.7 - You're always encouraging her
If, on a regular basis, you find yourself encouraging your girlfriend to go out and really experience life outside the couch or mall, you're in all likelihood too good for her. There are certain people for whom ambition or enthusiasm for the future are just plain anathema. You're not going to be her catalyst and all you're doing now is wasting valuable energy and focus that you should be spending on your own life.Move on.
No.6 - She can't pay for anything
When it comes time to pick up the check for a dinner, a movie or just about anything else the two of you are undertaking she is nowhere to be found. There are two types of women for whom this is a problem: The first is just oblivious to the fact that she should actually pitch into the relationship. The second is just without the ability and just doesn't seem to have any income. Life's too short to waste time on either of them.
No.5 - She's amazed by what you take for granted
At a certain point in life, certain realities set in and some things are just taken for granted. After college, a paycheck certainly falls into this category. If your girlfriend is dumbstruck by your ability to garner income, you're staring into the abyss of someone who cannot hold a job. This may be a warning sign of future problems.Other things that she’s awestruck by include paying bills, utilities or credit cards on a monthly basis. These should all let you know you're too good for her.
No.4 - She has poor hygiene
If you've noticed on numerous occasions that there is a certain unpleasant odor emanating from your betrothed, it may be time to move on. Some people are merely untidy while others endanger your health. You can try mentioning in passing that there seems to be something amiss, but by and large, you're going to be facing a recurring and uphill battle if you want her to change.
No.3 - She is devoid of natural curiosity
The universe is a strange and mysterious place. Every day you come across phenomena that nearly cry out for further explanation. At least you thought so, until you met your current girlfriend. If you've been together for a while and you've never heard her mention travel or a book she has read, you're in trouble. Conversations based upon first-hand experience from your day are both powerfully limiting and dull.
No.2 - She gets into trouble with the law
There is a time when authority figures are challenged and boundaries are defined. It's called adolescence. It's when your juvenile record can be sealed and expunged. If she's still shoplifting or finding herself on the business side of a DUI conviction, that's just reckless and is endangering your future. It shows that she hasn't developed a sense of what is right or wrong, nor does she have any respect for the possessions of others.
No.1 - Her best asset is her looks
Relationships are a growing concern. You're supposed to find other qualities that endear her to you beyond the initial physical attraction. If you haven't found anything like that and in fact have found many qualities that the good looks are covering up for, then you're too good for her. You need to move on and find someone else. If you don't, you're selling yourself short. Strike out in a new direction and find someone who is both physically attractive as well as your equal or better in the other 98% of life.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-signs-youre-too-good-for-her.html
Top 10: Sign Language Compliments
Women love compliments. They live for them, yearn for them and sometimes even fish for them. Why do they pine for voiced appreciation so badly? Probably because, for men, giving a compliment is as natural as not hitting the bowl rim while peeing or going an hour without thinking about sex -- it’s impossible. (See: I just thought about sex.)A woman would love to hear a man compliment her on the way she looks, how funny she is and how interesting her thoughts are. How would she feel if she got that compliment in the form of sign language?Sign language is easier than it looks. Just a few minutes and a guy can master hundreds of sweet things to say to his partner.Here are some simple sign language compliments to learn that will not only score you points with your woman, but show it is possible to teach an old dog some new tricks (except that peeing issue -- that’s going to take practice).
No.10 - "You look beautiful."
It’s a no-brainer that women love to be complimented on the way they look -- especially because of the amount of time, effort and money they put into making themselves look so good. You’d be surprised how many guys fail to notice or even say a word. A simple compliment about how great she looks is the perfect way to get things going on a good note. Give her the sign that she looks fantastic the moment she walks in the door
No.9 - "Your hair looks great."
Men don’t realize how much it costs for a woman to get her hair done. It doesn’t matter if it’s cutting it, coloring it or even blow-drying it, hair is the first thing women attend to when getting ready for a date. She has spent hours on getting her hair to look like she hasn’t spent hours on it, so sign off a quick compliment about how great her hair looks.
No.8 - "You have an amazing smile."
Actually getting her to smile is going to be your first goal -- try saying something witty at least once. Once she flashes the pearly whites, let her know how amazing her smile is with this simple sign. Women take as much pride in their teeth these days as they do their hair and nails. A simple compliment about her smile will get her to smile more, even when you crack your next dumb joke.
No.7 - "Do you work out?"
Women struggle with their body image. Even if they look fantastic and treat their body like a well-oiled machine, women still think their physiques need improvement in certain areas. Let her know her body looks fantastic with this hand gesture. If she says yes, apologize for asking such an obvious question. If she says no, tell her she has a body most women would die for. It’s a body you’d die for, but in a different way (don’t sign that).
No.6 - "I like the way your mind works."
A woman loves compliments about her mind almost as much as compliments about her appearance -- they show a guy is paying attention to more than just her curves. Drop in a simple sign about liking the way her mind works during a conversation and she will know that you are not only paying attention to what she has to say, but really letting it sink into that normally thick male skull.
No.5 - "You're definitely the hottest of your group."
This is a tough compliment to pull of in any language -- American sign language or plain old English -- but drop it at the right time and a woman will turn as red as her glass of Merlot. Women love their friends, but there is always a quest to be the best-looking one in the group -- it usually goes unspoken. Wait for the moment she is discussing her little clan or retelling a tale about one of their trips out on the town to drop this sign that she is definitely the best-looking woman in the group of lovely ladies.
No.4 - "You crack me up."
Every woman thinks she is hysterical. She believes she’s the funniest one among her friends -- it’s like being the thinnest contestant on The Biggest Loser. Some woman are actually funny and if your woman is quick with quip or the queen of one-liners, give her this sign to tell her she is pretty damn funny. Make sure you’re actually laughing while throwing out the sign -- it really sells it.
No.3 - "I'm having a great time."
Women want to know that the men they’re with are having a good time. They don’t want to have to come right out and ask (unlike men, who ask every 10 minutes -- back off!). Sign to her during a lull in the conversation that you are having a great time and follow it up with a smile or innocent little touch on the hand or arm. It will ease the situation and she will relax.
No.2 - "That is a great outfit."
The outfit she is wearing was the 800th clothing option for the evening. She put it on and took it off no less than 20 times. Sign that you love her outfit and it shows you are not only paying attention to the way she gets dressed for these meetings, but that her choice was a wise one (even though many of the 800 would have been fine). Make sure to go as far as to pick out an exact piece of clothing to highlight. The shoes are always a smart choice.
No.1 - "I could talk to you all night long."
This is obviously a lie. No guy wants to talk all night long. Hell, no woman wants to talk all night long, but it’s an incredibly nice thing to say. Give her this sign that you would love talking to her all night and she might throw you a sign that says: “Screw talking, let’s get to some action.” It’s not a hand signal but you will know when it happens.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-sign-language-compliments.html
No.10 - "You look beautiful."
It’s a no-brainer that women love to be complimented on the way they look -- especially because of the amount of time, effort and money they put into making themselves look so good. You’d be surprised how many guys fail to notice or even say a word. A simple compliment about how great she looks is the perfect way to get things going on a good note. Give her the sign that she looks fantastic the moment she walks in the door
No.9 - "Your hair looks great."
Men don’t realize how much it costs for a woman to get her hair done. It doesn’t matter if it’s cutting it, coloring it or even blow-drying it, hair is the first thing women attend to when getting ready for a date. She has spent hours on getting her hair to look like she hasn’t spent hours on it, so sign off a quick compliment about how great her hair looks.
No.8 - "You have an amazing smile."
Actually getting her to smile is going to be your first goal -- try saying something witty at least once. Once she flashes the pearly whites, let her know how amazing her smile is with this simple sign. Women take as much pride in their teeth these days as they do their hair and nails. A simple compliment about her smile will get her to smile more, even when you crack your next dumb joke.
No.7 - "Do you work out?"
Women struggle with their body image. Even if they look fantastic and treat their body like a well-oiled machine, women still think their physiques need improvement in certain areas. Let her know her body looks fantastic with this hand gesture. If she says yes, apologize for asking such an obvious question. If she says no, tell her she has a body most women would die for. It’s a body you’d die for, but in a different way (don’t sign that).
No.6 - "I like the way your mind works."
A woman loves compliments about her mind almost as much as compliments about her appearance -- they show a guy is paying attention to more than just her curves. Drop in a simple sign about liking the way her mind works during a conversation and she will know that you are not only paying attention to what she has to say, but really letting it sink into that normally thick male skull.
No.5 - "You're definitely the hottest of your group."
This is a tough compliment to pull of in any language -- American sign language or plain old English -- but drop it at the right time and a woman will turn as red as her glass of Merlot. Women love their friends, but there is always a quest to be the best-looking one in the group -- it usually goes unspoken. Wait for the moment she is discussing her little clan or retelling a tale about one of their trips out on the town to drop this sign that she is definitely the best-looking woman in the group of lovely ladies.
No.4 - "You crack me up."
Every woman thinks she is hysterical. She believes she’s the funniest one among her friends -- it’s like being the thinnest contestant on The Biggest Loser. Some woman are actually funny and if your woman is quick with quip or the queen of one-liners, give her this sign to tell her she is pretty damn funny. Make sure you’re actually laughing while throwing out the sign -- it really sells it.
No.3 - "I'm having a great time."
Women want to know that the men they’re with are having a good time. They don’t want to have to come right out and ask (unlike men, who ask every 10 minutes -- back off!). Sign to her during a lull in the conversation that you are having a great time and follow it up with a smile or innocent little touch on the hand or arm. It will ease the situation and she will relax.
No.2 - "That is a great outfit."
The outfit she is wearing was the 800th clothing option for the evening. She put it on and took it off no less than 20 times. Sign that you love her outfit and it shows you are not only paying attention to the way she gets dressed for these meetings, but that her choice was a wise one (even though many of the 800 would have been fine). Make sure to go as far as to pick out an exact piece of clothing to highlight. The shoes are always a smart choice.
No.1 - "I could talk to you all night long."
This is obviously a lie. No guy wants to talk all night long. Hell, no woman wants to talk all night long, but it’s an incredibly nice thing to say. Give her this sign that you would love talking to her all night and she might throw you a sign that says: “Screw talking, let’s get to some action.” It’s not a hand signal but you will know when it happens.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-sign-language-compliments.html
Top 10: Ways To Get Her Thinking Of You
Every guy wants to make a lasting impression on the woman he’s into. If she’s not thinking about you when you’re not around, then odds are she’s thinking about some other guy. Here are 10 tips you can use immediately to stand out from the crowd of men hitting on her every day.
No.10 - Use "little things" to woo her
There are a ton of “little things” that women look for to help them make big decisions about what kind of man you are. They instantly tell women whether or not you are worthy of a second thought. Maintaining eye contact, strong posture, not fidgeting; all of these are great things for you to pay attention to. By the way, women make these decisions on a subconscious level. They don't look at a guy, then say to a friend: "Well, he maintained eye contact when I first looked at him, then he held his head up high in a dominant posture, so, I'm going to give him a chance." Practice these simple steps and a woman will naturally want to spend more time with you.
No.9 - Break the ice online
Women aren't interested in being bored to tears by some guy who says: "Hi, here's my profile, please let me know if you're interested in knowing more." They want a challenge, they want electricity and they want someone who can hold their interest. So, be cocky, funny and playful. Say something like: "Saw your profile and I think you deserve a chance to get to know me. I think we could get along well. If you are interested, (which I know you will be) drop me a line, and if you sound as interesting as your profile says I might write back. " Women aren't interested in finding another friend when it comes to dating and romance. They want someone who makes them feel attraction.
No.8 - Get tons of dates
When guys get a woman’s number, we often start to feel weird about turning right around, talking to another woman, and getting her number too. We don't want to be seen as a "player" or insincere. My advice? Get over it. If you enjoy talking to a woman, and you'd like to get her number and go talk to other women, just say: "Here, write down your e-mail and number. I'm going to get back to being social." Women will see you as more interesting if you are talking to all of the women at the party.
No.7 - Get her number easily
Most guys are very nervous about approaching and starting conversations with women. However, if you can just realize that women want to meet men, and that they want men to approach them, it makes you consider that women probably want guys who aren't acting nervous and insecure. So, be direct and use what I call the "One Compliment" approach. Try saying, "Hi, you are... [pause]... beautiful and I had to take a moment and meet you." The pause is priceless. Look directly into her eyes as you talk -- and as you pause. This communicates that you're not afraid of her. Make small talk for a minute, then ask for her number. Easy.
No.6 - Go to a physical level
It’s important that you learn how to go from one stage to the next with a woman. Let’s say you’re at a bar or club and you meet a girl you really like and you start kissing. You can say, “Hey, come with me," and then take her hand and lead her to another part of the club or bar, or take her to the dance floor (or some combination), and then start kissing again. Then say: "Hey, I'm going to this other bar, come along with me." Once you're there, you continue all of the way until closing, when you say: "Hey, let's keep talking; this is fun. Give me a ride home..."
No.5 - Go to a physical level - take two
A woman wants to feel that things are developing naturally, not that you are just trying to get her into bed as fast as you can. If the evening unfolds in a normal, natural way, and you can progress from one level to the next, you'll do very well and go far. Why do you lead her to another part of the club and then take her somewhere else? Physically leading a woman is very powerful, and leaving together/showing up somewhere else together changes things. When you arrive at the new place, even though you're the same two people who just met, you're now together at the new place. And when you suggest continuing to talk, and her giving you a ride home (or some variation), it's not like saying: "Come shag me." You're making it clear that you want to spend time with her, and it leaves the possibility of anything happening open.
No.4 - Be more than just a friend
When a woman says, "I only like you as a friend" or "I've been hurt, so I want to take this slow" or "I like you so much, I don't want to lose you as a friend" -- or any of the million variations of these things -- it usually means that you're not doing the things it takes to create attraction. She doesn't feel it for you. And if she doesn't feel it, then there are no shortcuts, my man. Stop being such a "nice" guy, and start doing the things you're learning from me to spark some chemistry.
No.3 - Reverse your role
One of the best ways to tease a woman -- and amp up the attraction -- is to use "reverse gender stereotypes." If a woman says, "Give me your number" you can say: "Look, I'm not that easy... Don't think that just because I give you my number that I'm going to go out with you or sleep with you." Or, if you're talking to a woman at a bar and the conversation is going well, you can say: "OK, let's just cut to the chase: Are you going to offer to buy me a drink or what?" Attractive women instantly connect with the humor because you're turning around situations that they have had happen to them all of the time and making something funny out of them.
No.2 - Know when not to tease
Playfully teasing a woman is a great way to show you’re not at all intimidated by her. It’s not about hurting a woman, making her feel bad or being abusive in any way. But, there are times when you shouldn’t tease, like when you’re getting physically intimate. Most people let their emotional guard down during the process of having sex, and it's probably not a good time to tease and bust on a woman. That's my two cents on the subject.
No.1 - Keep her once you get her
I think that too many guys make the mistake of assuming that it's all about getting the girl, and they put far too little emphasis on keeping a great girl once they find one. The fact is, until you're in a situation where you've found a great woman who you'd like to keep in your life, you won't realize just how important it is to know how to keep her. Let’s say a woman you really like tells you she’s thinking about seeing an ex-boyfriend of hers. Instead of freaking out, tell her she has your blessing to check it out. Tests like this one can be a pain, but this is reality, and we have to deal with it when it shows up. I've been in many situations with women where I've felt like a jealous, insecure Wussbag myself -- I get it. If you’re prepared, you’ll pass the test and keep the girl you really want.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-ways-to-get-her-thinking-of-you.html
No.10 - Use "little things" to woo her
There are a ton of “little things” that women look for to help them make big decisions about what kind of man you are. They instantly tell women whether or not you are worthy of a second thought. Maintaining eye contact, strong posture, not fidgeting; all of these are great things for you to pay attention to. By the way, women make these decisions on a subconscious level. They don't look at a guy, then say to a friend: "Well, he maintained eye contact when I first looked at him, then he held his head up high in a dominant posture, so, I'm going to give him a chance." Practice these simple steps and a woman will naturally want to spend more time with you.
No.9 - Break the ice online
Women aren't interested in being bored to tears by some guy who says: "Hi, here's my profile, please let me know if you're interested in knowing more." They want a challenge, they want electricity and they want someone who can hold their interest. So, be cocky, funny and playful. Say something like: "Saw your profile and I think you deserve a chance to get to know me. I think we could get along well. If you are interested, (which I know you will be) drop me a line, and if you sound as interesting as your profile says I might write back. " Women aren't interested in finding another friend when it comes to dating and romance. They want someone who makes them feel attraction.
No.8 - Get tons of dates
When guys get a woman’s number, we often start to feel weird about turning right around, talking to another woman, and getting her number too. We don't want to be seen as a "player" or insincere. My advice? Get over it. If you enjoy talking to a woman, and you'd like to get her number and go talk to other women, just say: "Here, write down your e-mail and number. I'm going to get back to being social." Women will see you as more interesting if you are talking to all of the women at the party.
No.7 - Get her number easily
Most guys are very nervous about approaching and starting conversations with women. However, if you can just realize that women want to meet men, and that they want men to approach them, it makes you consider that women probably want guys who aren't acting nervous and insecure. So, be direct and use what I call the "One Compliment" approach. Try saying, "Hi, you are... [pause]... beautiful and I had to take a moment and meet you." The pause is priceless. Look directly into her eyes as you talk -- and as you pause. This communicates that you're not afraid of her. Make small talk for a minute, then ask for her number. Easy.
No.6 - Go to a physical level
It’s important that you learn how to go from one stage to the next with a woman. Let’s say you’re at a bar or club and you meet a girl you really like and you start kissing. You can say, “Hey, come with me," and then take her hand and lead her to another part of the club or bar, or take her to the dance floor (or some combination), and then start kissing again. Then say: "Hey, I'm going to this other bar, come along with me." Once you're there, you continue all of the way until closing, when you say: "Hey, let's keep talking; this is fun. Give me a ride home..."
No.5 - Go to a physical level - take two
A woman wants to feel that things are developing naturally, not that you are just trying to get her into bed as fast as you can. If the evening unfolds in a normal, natural way, and you can progress from one level to the next, you'll do very well and go far. Why do you lead her to another part of the club and then take her somewhere else? Physically leading a woman is very powerful, and leaving together/showing up somewhere else together changes things. When you arrive at the new place, even though you're the same two people who just met, you're now together at the new place. And when you suggest continuing to talk, and her giving you a ride home (or some variation), it's not like saying: "Come shag me." You're making it clear that you want to spend time with her, and it leaves the possibility of anything happening open.
No.4 - Be more than just a friend
When a woman says, "I only like you as a friend" or "I've been hurt, so I want to take this slow" or "I like you so much, I don't want to lose you as a friend" -- or any of the million variations of these things -- it usually means that you're not doing the things it takes to create attraction. She doesn't feel it for you. And if she doesn't feel it, then there are no shortcuts, my man. Stop being such a "nice" guy, and start doing the things you're learning from me to spark some chemistry.
No.3 - Reverse your role
One of the best ways to tease a woman -- and amp up the attraction -- is to use "reverse gender stereotypes." If a woman says, "Give me your number" you can say: "Look, I'm not that easy... Don't think that just because I give you my number that I'm going to go out with you or sleep with you." Or, if you're talking to a woman at a bar and the conversation is going well, you can say: "OK, let's just cut to the chase: Are you going to offer to buy me a drink or what?" Attractive women instantly connect with the humor because you're turning around situations that they have had happen to them all of the time and making something funny out of them.
No.2 - Know when not to tease
Playfully teasing a woman is a great way to show you’re not at all intimidated by her. It’s not about hurting a woman, making her feel bad or being abusive in any way. But, there are times when you shouldn’t tease, like when you’re getting physically intimate. Most people let their emotional guard down during the process of having sex, and it's probably not a good time to tease and bust on a woman. That's my two cents on the subject.
No.1 - Keep her once you get her
I think that too many guys make the mistake of assuming that it's all about getting the girl, and they put far too little emphasis on keeping a great girl once they find one. The fact is, until you're in a situation where you've found a great woman who you'd like to keep in your life, you won't realize just how important it is to know how to keep her. Let’s say a woman you really like tells you she’s thinking about seeing an ex-boyfriend of hers. Instead of freaking out, tell her she has your blessing to check it out. Tests like this one can be a pain, but this is reality, and we have to deal with it when it shows up. I've been in many situations with women where I've felt like a jealous, insecure Wussbag myself -- I get it. If you’re prepared, you’ll pass the test and keep the girl you really want.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-ways-to-get-her-thinking-of-you.html
Top 10: Reasons Not To Get Married
Being of sane mind and a lover of “everybody,” we want to take the counterpoint approach to the great and lovely institue of marriage and explain the top 10 reasons not to get married. For those of you who believe in the sanctity of marriage and all that it stands for, check back in a few weeks' time for our colleague Andrew Moore's more than admirable job explaining the Top 10: Reasons To Get Married.Marriage was created in the days of governmental control and religious choke holds on the people. The idea of spending forever with someone was bearable because humans only lived until the ripe old age of 40. However, this isn’t your great-great granddad’s black-and-white world anymore.This isn’t an argument against love or being with the person that makes you happy (for any extended period of time), it’s just an argument against the actual institution of marriage and all of the outdated rules that surround the entire concept.
No.10 - Marriage will make her let herself go
Women gain weight in the relationship because of child birth, but a recent study from the University of Queensland in Australia confirms that even women that don’t have a kid end up gaining a substantial amount of weight in wedded bliss.According to the findings, a woman will gain up to 15 pounds if she had a partner but no baby in the first 10 years of marriage. The study goes on to explain that there are metabolic changes over that time so the weight gain can only be attributed to altered behavior. The altered behavior is not putting in the time and effort in their fitness routines and eating habits.Men are just as guilty for letting themselves evolve into a chubby hubby and this gives women a get-out-of-dieting-free card. She might look good now, but add at least 10 pounds to her frame after the wedding ring slides on the finger.
No.9 - Marriage is the end of options
Variety is the spice of life. Spice is also the name of the stripper dancing on your lap and slipping you her cell number. No more of that Mr. Married. Settling down with one woman eliminates the wide selection of women and the thrill of the chase. No more flings with a coworker, gym pickups, one-night stands, and no more crazy chicks. Crazy chicks make dating so much fun! Plus, watch what happens the minute you get hitched. Not only do a ton of potential bed buddies come crawling out of the woodwork like carpenter ants, but all the women in your life that you could have scored with start admitting a sexual interest but say: “Too bad you’re getting married.” Yes. Too bad indeed.
No.8 - Marriage is expensive
Facts and figures released each year by the wedding industries prove that weddings are getting out of control when it comes to price. Last year, Americans spent $71 billion dollars on weddings with each ceremony averaging $28,704. Most marital issues are rooted in problems with money (usually a lack of it), so it's probably not the best idea to kick-start a marriage choking on debt from a wedding cake and a band that ignored all the songs on your “don’t play” list. Sure you’ve got two incomes, but now the questions about how, where and why you spend your money start to creep into the conversation. You have to explain why you spend the money you make like your mom is asking where all your allowance goes. When is marriage the most expensive? When it ends in divorce.
No.7 - Marriage is just paperwork
It’s perfectly acceptable to be in a monogamous relationship with someone you love and care for, but why do you need a piece of paper from the state or church? Marriage certificates are an unnecessary and potentially expensive formality just to share health insurance. If the two of you are happy with the current agreement, why rock the boat? Is it because of family pressures and the constant “when are you getting married?” questions from all the miserable people stuck in a marriage and looking to suck you into their black hole of depression? That’s so sweet of them.
No.6 - Marriage is the end of spontaneity
Married couples love to tell people they are still spontaneous. It’s like when people tell you they don’t take crap or that they are not someone you want to mess with. They are full of crap. Spontaneous people don’t talk about how spontaneous they are because they are too busy going places and living a full life. Married people have a diluted and compromised idea of spontaneity. They have spontaneous ideas that then involve months of planning, calendar juggling and last minute cancellations that become “we will do that soon.” They’d love to hop a flight for a weekend trip to Vegas, but that money would be better spent on the bills or putting money into buying a bigger house. Spontaneity also leads to a ton of compromise. Compromise sucks.
No.5 - Marriage is constant compromise
Life is meant to be lived; to experience everything before the long dirt nap. Hard to accomplish everything when you spend half the time doing the things she wants to do. Well, you did get to pick the activity last week. You wanted to go to go white water rafting and now she wants to catch a Nicholas Sparks marathon on Lifetime and needs you around to watch her cry and restock her tissue supply. Compromise isn’t just associated with small decisions. You’re going to have to come to an agreement on where you live, where your money goes and a million other choices you make just to make her happy.
No.4 - Marriage is the end of sex
There is still sex -- occasionally. Those occasions are usually holidays, birthdays and every time she feels like you might be considering tipping your donkey in the community pond. It’s as bland as a sugar-free cookie. It’s always in the same location, boring position and ends the same way every time. Want to try something new? Not tonight. Not ever if we are being honest. Sure, some women will experiment, but it won’t be a long-term move added to the routine. Those early days of screwing longer than a cordless screwdriver are long over.
No.3 - Marriage often fails
Would you risk your life on the flip of a coin? Heads you live, tales you die. You do have a 50-50 chance, but are those really good odds for even giving it a shot? Not as drastic or life threatening, but over 50% of marriages end in divorce. Even people, who are truly in love with each other and the idea of spending the rest of their lives with one person find themselves in divorce. If you fall right in the middle on the idea of marriage (obviously, you have concerns, you’re reading this article), how can you make it work when people who want to get married can’t even stay together?
No.2 - Marriage is the end of taking risks
Life involves risks -- some that work out and some that crack you in the face and knock you back to the beginning. So what do you do? Take a risk and try all over again. This is fine so long as you’re the only person who suffers from the setbacks. You can’t take chances when another person’s life, money, health, and future are in your hands. That would be a pretty selfish thing to do. Marriage means you’re keeping the best interests of two people in mind during every decision. Sure, it might keep you from making the leap into some pretty dumb moves, but it might also hold you back from pulling the trigger on an idea that will make your life better forever.
No.1 - Marriage is forever
Think about the person you were a few years ago. Now think back a few years before that to how different it seems from life now. Now ponder the person you will be 10 years from now; you’re likely slightly similar but with many new tastes, feelings, emotions, and at a much different place in life. Is it really possible to think, or want, another human to come along for that crazy ride? No more risks, no more weekend trips to anywhere and all that compromise, money wasted and lack of sex for the rest of your days on earth. Until death do you part. You may now kiss the bride. Hopefully it’s “goodbye.”
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-reasons-not-to-get-married.html
No.10 - Marriage will make her let herself go
Women gain weight in the relationship because of child birth, but a recent study from the University of Queensland in Australia confirms that even women that don’t have a kid end up gaining a substantial amount of weight in wedded bliss.According to the findings, a woman will gain up to 15 pounds if she had a partner but no baby in the first 10 years of marriage. The study goes on to explain that there are metabolic changes over that time so the weight gain can only be attributed to altered behavior. The altered behavior is not putting in the time and effort in their fitness routines and eating habits.Men are just as guilty for letting themselves evolve into a chubby hubby and this gives women a get-out-of-dieting-free card. She might look good now, but add at least 10 pounds to her frame after the wedding ring slides on the finger.
No.9 - Marriage is the end of options
Variety is the spice of life. Spice is also the name of the stripper dancing on your lap and slipping you her cell number. No more of that Mr. Married. Settling down with one woman eliminates the wide selection of women and the thrill of the chase. No more flings with a coworker, gym pickups, one-night stands, and no more crazy chicks. Crazy chicks make dating so much fun! Plus, watch what happens the minute you get hitched. Not only do a ton of potential bed buddies come crawling out of the woodwork like carpenter ants, but all the women in your life that you could have scored with start admitting a sexual interest but say: “Too bad you’re getting married.” Yes. Too bad indeed.
No.8 - Marriage is expensive
Facts and figures released each year by the wedding industries prove that weddings are getting out of control when it comes to price. Last year, Americans spent $71 billion dollars on weddings with each ceremony averaging $28,704. Most marital issues are rooted in problems with money (usually a lack of it), so it's probably not the best idea to kick-start a marriage choking on debt from a wedding cake and a band that ignored all the songs on your “don’t play” list. Sure you’ve got two incomes, but now the questions about how, where and why you spend your money start to creep into the conversation. You have to explain why you spend the money you make like your mom is asking where all your allowance goes. When is marriage the most expensive? When it ends in divorce.
No.7 - Marriage is just paperwork
It’s perfectly acceptable to be in a monogamous relationship with someone you love and care for, but why do you need a piece of paper from the state or church? Marriage certificates are an unnecessary and potentially expensive formality just to share health insurance. If the two of you are happy with the current agreement, why rock the boat? Is it because of family pressures and the constant “when are you getting married?” questions from all the miserable people stuck in a marriage and looking to suck you into their black hole of depression? That’s so sweet of them.
No.6 - Marriage is the end of spontaneity
Married couples love to tell people they are still spontaneous. It’s like when people tell you they don’t take crap or that they are not someone you want to mess with. They are full of crap. Spontaneous people don’t talk about how spontaneous they are because they are too busy going places and living a full life. Married people have a diluted and compromised idea of spontaneity. They have spontaneous ideas that then involve months of planning, calendar juggling and last minute cancellations that become “we will do that soon.” They’d love to hop a flight for a weekend trip to Vegas, but that money would be better spent on the bills or putting money into buying a bigger house. Spontaneity also leads to a ton of compromise. Compromise sucks.
No.5 - Marriage is constant compromise
Life is meant to be lived; to experience everything before the long dirt nap. Hard to accomplish everything when you spend half the time doing the things she wants to do. Well, you did get to pick the activity last week. You wanted to go to go white water rafting and now she wants to catch a Nicholas Sparks marathon on Lifetime and needs you around to watch her cry and restock her tissue supply. Compromise isn’t just associated with small decisions. You’re going to have to come to an agreement on where you live, where your money goes and a million other choices you make just to make her happy.
No.4 - Marriage is the end of sex
There is still sex -- occasionally. Those occasions are usually holidays, birthdays and every time she feels like you might be considering tipping your donkey in the community pond. It’s as bland as a sugar-free cookie. It’s always in the same location, boring position and ends the same way every time. Want to try something new? Not tonight. Not ever if we are being honest. Sure, some women will experiment, but it won’t be a long-term move added to the routine. Those early days of screwing longer than a cordless screwdriver are long over.
No.3 - Marriage often fails
Would you risk your life on the flip of a coin? Heads you live, tales you die. You do have a 50-50 chance, but are those really good odds for even giving it a shot? Not as drastic or life threatening, but over 50% of marriages end in divorce. Even people, who are truly in love with each other and the idea of spending the rest of their lives with one person find themselves in divorce. If you fall right in the middle on the idea of marriage (obviously, you have concerns, you’re reading this article), how can you make it work when people who want to get married can’t even stay together?
No.2 - Marriage is the end of taking risks
Life involves risks -- some that work out and some that crack you in the face and knock you back to the beginning. So what do you do? Take a risk and try all over again. This is fine so long as you’re the only person who suffers from the setbacks. You can’t take chances when another person’s life, money, health, and future are in your hands. That would be a pretty selfish thing to do. Marriage means you’re keeping the best interests of two people in mind during every decision. Sure, it might keep you from making the leap into some pretty dumb moves, but it might also hold you back from pulling the trigger on an idea that will make your life better forever.
No.1 - Marriage is forever
Think about the person you were a few years ago. Now think back a few years before that to how different it seems from life now. Now ponder the person you will be 10 years from now; you’re likely slightly similar but with many new tastes, feelings, emotions, and at a much different place in life. Is it really possible to think, or want, another human to come along for that crazy ride? No more risks, no more weekend trips to anywhere and all that compromise, money wasted and lack of sex for the rest of your days on earth. Until death do you part. You may now kiss the bride. Hopefully it’s “goodbye.”
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-reasons-not-to-get-married.html
Top 10: Most Dangerous Women
Dating is like a safari -- but on a safari you have qualified guides who know the lay of the land and the predators. In the dating world, your only guide is the man downstairs, and he’ll lead you in the wrong direction. Whether she’s crazy, clingy, reckless, or just can’t stop having sex with other people, you won’t care because she’s hot.Forewarned is forearmed.Before you jump out on the hunt, you had best have your field guide of the predators out on the prowl for you, Mr. Single And Looking. Knowing the top 10 most dangerous women will keep your current safari hunt from being your last.
No.10 - Reckless Rhonda
This dangerous predator stalks in the high grass and is the beast in everything she does. She drinks too much, does too many drugs and gets into fights. The best part is that she digs her claws in and drags you into her reckless behavior. Look for your dates together to start gently and to finish terribly. Things will escalate as she yells at the waitstaff, drinks until vomiting and greets the biggest man (or woman) in the bar with a: “What the hell are you looking at?” Reckless Rhonda is easy to find, hard to get rid of and kicks off our list of the top 10 most dangerous women.
No.9 - The Jealous Monster
This fierce monster is green-eyed and shows its true colors when another female enters the area. You fall for her ways (and her body) and the next thing you know she’s accusing you of flirting with the girl across the club (your sister), the cashier at the store (she was handing your change) and the woman who knew you by name at the bank (you work there and have a name tag). The Jealous Monster will not be afraid to make a scene while accusing you of far more action than you really have ever had. Watch out for her apology that usually starts on the phone and ends in the bedroom.
No.8 - Clingy
Like a boa constrictor in the jungle, the Clingy woman will start out silent and misleading. At first, it begins with her showing her best side. She’ll get close, flirt and be a wildcat in the sack until you don’t call her the next day. She’ll want to be around you so much that she will suffocate you with her coils. Look for the signs when her loving nature turns to possessiveness and control. When confronted, she may pull back to her sweet nature, only to strike again when you don’t call her every hour on the hour.
No.7 - The Slut
This one put it on you. She obviously has sexual skills -- and everyone’s tried them. She may even be using them on more than just you. The Slut is the chameleon of dangerous women; she can change her ways to pull the next fool into her lair. Signs of her hunt begin with stories that don’t line up: She’s canceling dates because she’s staying at home or work, however, she’s not there when you call. Run at the first hint of danger because she’s good enough to keep you on the hook if you let her.
No.6 - The Missionary
This dangerous woman is out to convert you under the umbrella of enlightenment. She has found the newest and best way to eat, the best religion to follow or the newest type of MP3 player. She wants you to join her in this new understanding. While the Control Freak is forceful, the Missionary is subtle, persistent and falls back on whining and begging (and probably sex). Her skills are not inescapable though; keep in mind that she’s a missionary out to convert you and probably only does the missionary position anyway.
No.5 - The Control Freak
She’ll dig her claws into every aspect of your life only to tell you how you’re doing it wrong and need to do it her way. Soon, you’ll be expected to drive at her suggested speed, eat what she says to eat and dress in what she picks out. Just when you get ready to tell her how to go to hell, she shakes her booty off and has you hooked.The Control Freak begins with suggestions and, after a while, you’re taking her orders and relinquishing control.
No.4 - The Desperate Woman
There are few creatures stalking the dating world as dangerous as the Desperate Woman (aka, Feminae Desperatus). She’s falling apart and taking you with her. She’ll do anything to be in a relationship but can’t do anything right to stay in a good one. The Desperate Woman yearns to be in a relationship, she wants to micromanage the hell out of everything, and she may be deafened by the ticking of her biological clock. Watch out for her attempts to find inner peace with the idea of pregnancy giving meaning to her crumbling life. Look for this sperm-jacking predator’s signs of “Hey, we don’t need a condom” and “Don’t worry, I’m on the pill.”
No.3 - Gold Digger
While most of these predators go after you, the Gold Digger goes after your wallet. This cunning creature will use her womanly wiles to lure you deeper into her territory by appealing to your lower brain. Once you’re in her lair, she’ll start asking you to pay for it. It starts with picking up every dinner and night out, and then shifts to gas money and to bills. She’ll try to write it off as you helping her look good for you (by keeping on her electricity and heat) and it will grow from there. The first sign this dangerous woman is stalking is the second you see a bill with pages attached to it.
No.2 - Miss Daddy Issues
No safari would be complete without this creature. She’s full of rage and resentment because of another man: her father. It could be his judgment of her lifestyle. It could be that he didn’t hug her enough. There’s something about her father that makes her mad as hell and she found something in you that reminds her of him. As seen in AskMen's article on her daddy issues, she may exhibit sexual aggressiveness and excessive flirting. You won’t see it coming and you won’t understand why -- but you’ll get daddy’s dearest and all her craziness.
No.1 - The Beautiful Pain In The Ass
Ah, she’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen, and she’ll rope you in with her sexy ways and her killer body. She’s the venus flytrap of dangerous women. Her hotness lures you in but then her issues are the deal breaker. She could be crazy, on the rebound or dueling today’s alter ego. But when you get fed up with her crap, she shows up in a short black dress or nothing at all and you fall all over again. This one, the Beautiful Pain In The Ass, makes you regret life but she always finds a way to mount your head up on her wall. She’s the No.1 most dangerous woman because she’s the chimera of dangerous women all rolled up into one. Her beauty will make you disregard common sense and your boys’ advice like a siren’s call.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-most-dangerous-women.html
No.10 - Reckless Rhonda
This dangerous predator stalks in the high grass and is the beast in everything she does. She drinks too much, does too many drugs and gets into fights. The best part is that she digs her claws in and drags you into her reckless behavior. Look for your dates together to start gently and to finish terribly. Things will escalate as she yells at the waitstaff, drinks until vomiting and greets the biggest man (or woman) in the bar with a: “What the hell are you looking at?” Reckless Rhonda is easy to find, hard to get rid of and kicks off our list of the top 10 most dangerous women.
No.9 - The Jealous Monster
This fierce monster is green-eyed and shows its true colors when another female enters the area. You fall for her ways (and her body) and the next thing you know she’s accusing you of flirting with the girl across the club (your sister), the cashier at the store (she was handing your change) and the woman who knew you by name at the bank (you work there and have a name tag). The Jealous Monster will not be afraid to make a scene while accusing you of far more action than you really have ever had. Watch out for her apology that usually starts on the phone and ends in the bedroom.
No.8 - Clingy
Like a boa constrictor in the jungle, the Clingy woman will start out silent and misleading. At first, it begins with her showing her best side. She’ll get close, flirt and be a wildcat in the sack until you don’t call her the next day. She’ll want to be around you so much that she will suffocate you with her coils. Look for the signs when her loving nature turns to possessiveness and control. When confronted, she may pull back to her sweet nature, only to strike again when you don’t call her every hour on the hour.
No.7 - The Slut
This one put it on you. She obviously has sexual skills -- and everyone’s tried them. She may even be using them on more than just you. The Slut is the chameleon of dangerous women; she can change her ways to pull the next fool into her lair. Signs of her hunt begin with stories that don’t line up: She’s canceling dates because she’s staying at home or work, however, she’s not there when you call. Run at the first hint of danger because she’s good enough to keep you on the hook if you let her.
No.6 - The Missionary
This dangerous woman is out to convert you under the umbrella of enlightenment. She has found the newest and best way to eat, the best religion to follow or the newest type of MP3 player. She wants you to join her in this new understanding. While the Control Freak is forceful, the Missionary is subtle, persistent and falls back on whining and begging (and probably sex). Her skills are not inescapable though; keep in mind that she’s a missionary out to convert you and probably only does the missionary position anyway.
No.5 - The Control Freak
She’ll dig her claws into every aspect of your life only to tell you how you’re doing it wrong and need to do it her way. Soon, you’ll be expected to drive at her suggested speed, eat what she says to eat and dress in what she picks out. Just when you get ready to tell her how to go to hell, she shakes her booty off and has you hooked.The Control Freak begins with suggestions and, after a while, you’re taking her orders and relinquishing control.
No.4 - The Desperate Woman
There are few creatures stalking the dating world as dangerous as the Desperate Woman (aka, Feminae Desperatus). She’s falling apart and taking you with her. She’ll do anything to be in a relationship but can’t do anything right to stay in a good one. The Desperate Woman yearns to be in a relationship, she wants to micromanage the hell out of everything, and she may be deafened by the ticking of her biological clock. Watch out for her attempts to find inner peace with the idea of pregnancy giving meaning to her crumbling life. Look for this sperm-jacking predator’s signs of “Hey, we don’t need a condom” and “Don’t worry, I’m on the pill.”
No.3 - Gold Digger
While most of these predators go after you, the Gold Digger goes after your wallet. This cunning creature will use her womanly wiles to lure you deeper into her territory by appealing to your lower brain. Once you’re in her lair, she’ll start asking you to pay for it. It starts with picking up every dinner and night out, and then shifts to gas money and to bills. She’ll try to write it off as you helping her look good for you (by keeping on her electricity and heat) and it will grow from there. The first sign this dangerous woman is stalking is the second you see a bill with pages attached to it.
No.2 - Miss Daddy Issues
No safari would be complete without this creature. She’s full of rage and resentment because of another man: her father. It could be his judgment of her lifestyle. It could be that he didn’t hug her enough. There’s something about her father that makes her mad as hell and she found something in you that reminds her of him. As seen in AskMen's article on her daddy issues, she may exhibit sexual aggressiveness and excessive flirting. You won’t see it coming and you won’t understand why -- but you’ll get daddy’s dearest and all her craziness.
No.1 - The Beautiful Pain In The Ass
Ah, she’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen, and she’ll rope you in with her sexy ways and her killer body. She’s the venus flytrap of dangerous women. Her hotness lures you in but then her issues are the deal breaker. She could be crazy, on the rebound or dueling today’s alter ego. But when you get fed up with her crap, she shows up in a short black dress or nothing at all and you fall all over again. This one, the Beautiful Pain In The Ass, makes you regret life but she always finds a way to mount your head up on her wall. She’s the No.1 most dangerous woman because she’s the chimera of dangerous women all rolled up into one. Her beauty will make you disregard common sense and your boys’ advice like a siren’s call.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-most-dangerous-women.html
Top 10: Signs She's Settling For You
AskMen recently ran a feature highlighting a disturbing new trend amongst women of a marriageable age lowering their standards for the sake of their futures -- in other words, women who settle for their men. Many of you asked us how you could spot if a woman might be doing this with you -- so here's your answer.It seems that a man not only has to worry about getting the girl to like him enough to be in a relationship, but also if she likes him for him and not just for the sake of being a glorified sperm donor. This new wave of settling completely slaps the idea of love and "happily ever after" in the face.Any real man would not want to be settled for. Here are the top 10 signs that she's settling for you.
No.10 - You have logical discussions, not passionate ones
There seems to be a distance of emotion between the two of you. Of course you talk and enjoy each other's company, but it's mostly polite and logical and it lacks passion. If she's only looking for a companion who isn't necessarily concerned with love, chances are your relationship will be very civilised and proper but will lack the fire or spark that is apparent in loving relationships.If it is too comfortable or boring and there are never any emotional peaks, that's because she is after an expensive ring and kids to show off. Who needs emotional connection for that?
No.9 - Routine is the foundation of your relationship
Love is spontaneous, it knows not of time nor routine. Surprise gifts, romantic getaways on the spur of the moment, unplanned midnight skinny dipping are the kinds of things people do when in love. They get caught up in the moment and are happy to be whisked away by the wonderfully rapid tides of true romance.If routine seems to be the foundation of your relationship and she's not too bothered about experiencing new things with you, that's because she only wants to marry you. There is no need for romance when you settle.
No.8 - You don't spend time together, yet she talks of marriage
People in worthwhile relationships actually like to spend time together. In fact, good couples try to spend as much time together as possible. They go out of their way to fit in just a couple hours together. If you both spend more time apart than you do together, and she's not too concerned with that, it might be because she just wants you to ease the load of parenthood and put food on the table.Spending time with your loved one should be a fun experience that you both cherish. She doesn't need to spend time with the man she's settling with for that.
No.7 - You don't have much in common
Most good couples actually share similar passions, which give them the opportunity to appreciate, explore and share together. Many times their similar passions lead to their romantic future together.If you find that, upon reflection, you have little in common but she seems unfazed by it and unwilling to work towards it, then maybe something is amiss. Similar passions are for her long-lost soul mate, not the man she's settling for.
No.6 - Her views on love are jaded
All women want to be in love. There has never been anything more desirable for her than finding her soul mate and living happily ever after. She's been reading stories of princes saving princesses her entire life, which means she's always dreamt of being the princess waiting for her prince. But now she's dismissive of the notion of romance, in fact she's quite negative about the whole thing.If she sees love as idealistic and relationships like that as unrealistic, she's given up on love and you're probably her realistic frog instead of the prince charming.
No.5 - She describes your relationship as "nice"
The best kind of compliments are those that are specific and individual. It shows us that the other person has paid attention to whatever it is and appreciates us for it -- there is a justification for it and that makes us feel special. Compliments that are not specific to ourselves don't hold much value, especially when the comment could be said about many others.If she uses broad non-specific terms like "nice," "comfortable” or “pleasant,” chances are she's making do with you.
No.4 - Parenthood is her main excitement
The whole point of settling for Mr. Good Enough is so she can get married and start a family. She will make it clear that having kids is high on her list and will make sure it's on yours too. She's getting to the end of her reproductive life span and she'll certainly make sure she's not going to waste it on a guy who doesn't want to get married and have children in the near future.Has she already brought up the conversation? If she's constantly bringing it up and shows more excitement in that subject more than others, chances are you are Mr. Good Enough.
No.3 - Your world is ordinary rather than special
All great couples create their own world together. It might be in jokes, fantasies, code words, perhaps even their own language. Whatever it may be, they are actively building and living in a world that is different from everyone else's. If you are just sharing an ordinary world together with nothing different from anyone else, then something isn't quite right.Be sure to test the waters; try to build something together using your imaginations. If she doesn't seem all that interested, that's because she doesn't need to go to all that effort for Mr. Good Enough.
No.2 - Conversation is practical, not personal
Communication is a sure fire way to tell the strength of a couple. If they're constantly talking about all kinds of topics that don't follow a particular logical order but are personal to them, it's a good sign that they enjoy each other's company and are in a good relationship.Are the majority of the conversations you have about practical everyday things like household issues or tasks that need to be done? You may want to ask yourself if these are the kinds of conversations you dreamt of having with the woman of your dreams. She's probably asked herself the same thing, but no longer cares.
No.1 - Sex is functional and rare
Sex when in love or at least in a great relationship is passionate and emotion-filled. It's possibly the truest expression of the bond two people have. The sex should be frequent and initiated by both people -- not to mention it should be good.Is she not very affectionate, nor particularly animated while you are inside her and doesn't seem very enthusiastic about sleeping with you? If the answer is yes, then chances are she sees sex with you as an obligation and puts up with it because she knows she has to add some sort of value to the man she's settling for.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-signs-shes-settling-for-you.html
Top 10: Ways To Tell Your Casual Relationship Isn't Casual
So, you’re shacking up on a regular basis with a gorgeous girl that can’t get enough of your lovin’. There’s no commitment, you’re still free to roam and you have no-strings-attached sex on tap. High five.However, after you have been intimate with a woman on a regular basis, you may notice subtle relationship tendencies begin to rear their ugly heads. Beware, many of these signs can creep up on you overnight and may be the only indicator that you are sliding d*ck-first into relationship quicksand.Word to the wise: Don’t flip out before gathering hard evidence. You don’t want to scare away an awesome sex-buddy for no good reason, that’s plain stupid. Just keep your eyes open, your senses keen and stay on your toes -- you’re fighting for your independence out there, gentlemen.
No.10 - Assumed dates
If you start hearing things like “I thought Saturday was our night,” you may be dealing with a lady friend that is staking claim to your freedom. Resist. Make your voice heard now. It is important to realise that even at this micro level, you are mapping out invisible rules and boundaries that are difficult to reverse. Before you know it, you can find yourself having to offer up excuses as to why you are deviating from your expected quota of weekly dates. If this is the case, casual has left the building.
No.9 - Pet names
A pet name refers to a term of endearment that couples often give to each other, a sort of secret, coded language that heightens the bond between two people. Pet names can seem harmless enough and even kind of cute, but a grown man should never use a word like “shmoopy.”If the name used has anything to do with food (cupcake, honey, pumpkin), an animal (kitten, bear, monkey) or a hybrid with a word that sounds warm or comfortable (snuggle-bunny, cuddle-muffin), then you may be slipping into a relationship coma.
No.8 - Public displays of affection
Public displays of affection (PDA) refers to the exhibitionist practice of kissing, holding hands and cuddling in public. If you could translate body language into words, these actions say “this man is taken” and that man means you. No one wants a chocolate bar that has been licked by someone else.Resisting these moves may bring awkward conversations, but it’s better than someone pissing on your leg to mark their territory. Once a line has been drawn in the sand, we have ourselves a boundary. No means no.
No.7 - Repeat phone calls
If your friend with benefits is calling you multiple times a day to see how you are, she is thinking about you too much. Unless she’s touching herself on the other end of the line, this phone call is not sexual, it is romantic.Also, be on the lookout for trivial text messages such as “I’m eating a sandwich” or “I just looked at the sky and it reminded me of you.” Politely reply “That’s nice” and get off the train at the next stop.
No.6 - Dropping the word “boyfriend”
Sure, once or twice is OK, a mistake, a slip of the tongue, a Tourette’s spasm. However, if dropping the word "boyfriend" seems deliberate or if it happens too often, then you have yourself a problem.The trick with this p*ssy trap is that if you confront the situation, you invite the inevitable question of “So, why aren’t we in a relationship, then?” Let it slide but keep score. If she drops too many B-bombs, you need to light a fire and get out of there.
No.5 - Less emphasis on sex, more on "quality time"
In a casual relationship, quality time is made up of pillow talk and those brief moments before you have sex, when you say hello, nice to see you. If she’s booking cultural events or holiday time with you months in advance, she is projecting into the future and putting you there.You are now in a situation that is far from casual and have been led there under false pretences. You sent away a comic book coupon for sea monkeys and got back an envelope of crack cocaine. It’s not your fault. Walk away.
No.4 - Four words: “We look good together”
This is not the language of friends with benefits. This woman is fantasising about a world in which the two of you are together and happy. It’s sickening. It’s like catching her masturbating over a wedding magazine.There’s the outside possibility that it could be a casual remark, maybe the two of you do look good together. Keep your Spidey-sense on high alert though; these four words have been known to act as a gateway drug to a much more serious relationship.
No.3 - Staring: lovingly, adoringly or longingly
Newsflash: If she’s looking at you with puppy-dog eyes and her head tilted to one side, there’s an excellent chance that sex is not on her mind. She may look docile enough, but as she sits there staring at you, all her unnecessary bodily functions are shutting down so that she can focus all her energy on falling in love with you. While she is in this trance-like state, get up slowly and back out of the room.
No.2 - The toothbrush syndrome
Admire a girl for her practicality when she brings a tooth brush to your house. Fear the girl who leaves one behind, for she has begun moving in and this is her first little suitcase.One way to solve this problem is to carry the offending toothbrush around in your pocket and next time you see her, give it back. Play the dumb-guy card and say: “I thought you might need it.” Repeat when necessary.
No.1 - Meeting the Fockers
When a girl arranges, requests or suggests meeting her parents, you have clearly left her bedroom and walked into her life. If there is a way out, then dammit man, get out. But if you’re locked in, just get through as best you can by sticking to conversations about weather, current events and family pets. Don’t crack jokes and avoid discussing politics, money or religion.Also, don’t let your guard down around her father; never forget that he knows you’re sleeping with his little girl.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-ways-to-tell-your-casual-relationship-isnt-casual.html
No.10 - Assumed dates
If you start hearing things like “I thought Saturday was our night,” you may be dealing with a lady friend that is staking claim to your freedom. Resist. Make your voice heard now. It is important to realise that even at this micro level, you are mapping out invisible rules and boundaries that are difficult to reverse. Before you know it, you can find yourself having to offer up excuses as to why you are deviating from your expected quota of weekly dates. If this is the case, casual has left the building.
No.9 - Pet names
A pet name refers to a term of endearment that couples often give to each other, a sort of secret, coded language that heightens the bond between two people. Pet names can seem harmless enough and even kind of cute, but a grown man should never use a word like “shmoopy.”If the name used has anything to do with food (cupcake, honey, pumpkin), an animal (kitten, bear, monkey) or a hybrid with a word that sounds warm or comfortable (snuggle-bunny, cuddle-muffin), then you may be slipping into a relationship coma.
No.8 - Public displays of affection
Public displays of affection (PDA) refers to the exhibitionist practice of kissing, holding hands and cuddling in public. If you could translate body language into words, these actions say “this man is taken” and that man means you. No one wants a chocolate bar that has been licked by someone else.Resisting these moves may bring awkward conversations, but it’s better than someone pissing on your leg to mark their territory. Once a line has been drawn in the sand, we have ourselves a boundary. No means no.
No.7 - Repeat phone calls
If your friend with benefits is calling you multiple times a day to see how you are, she is thinking about you too much. Unless she’s touching herself on the other end of the line, this phone call is not sexual, it is romantic.Also, be on the lookout for trivial text messages such as “I’m eating a sandwich” or “I just looked at the sky and it reminded me of you.” Politely reply “That’s nice” and get off the train at the next stop.
No.6 - Dropping the word “boyfriend”
Sure, once or twice is OK, a mistake, a slip of the tongue, a Tourette’s spasm. However, if dropping the word "boyfriend" seems deliberate or if it happens too often, then you have yourself a problem.The trick with this p*ssy trap is that if you confront the situation, you invite the inevitable question of “So, why aren’t we in a relationship, then?” Let it slide but keep score. If she drops too many B-bombs, you need to light a fire and get out of there.
No.5 - Less emphasis on sex, more on "quality time"
In a casual relationship, quality time is made up of pillow talk and those brief moments before you have sex, when you say hello, nice to see you. If she’s booking cultural events or holiday time with you months in advance, she is projecting into the future and putting you there.You are now in a situation that is far from casual and have been led there under false pretences. You sent away a comic book coupon for sea monkeys and got back an envelope of crack cocaine. It’s not your fault. Walk away.
No.4 - Four words: “We look good together”
This is not the language of friends with benefits. This woman is fantasising about a world in which the two of you are together and happy. It’s sickening. It’s like catching her masturbating over a wedding magazine.There’s the outside possibility that it could be a casual remark, maybe the two of you do look good together. Keep your Spidey-sense on high alert though; these four words have been known to act as a gateway drug to a much more serious relationship.
No.3 - Staring: lovingly, adoringly or longingly
Newsflash: If she’s looking at you with puppy-dog eyes and her head tilted to one side, there’s an excellent chance that sex is not on her mind. She may look docile enough, but as she sits there staring at you, all her unnecessary bodily functions are shutting down so that she can focus all her energy on falling in love with you. While she is in this trance-like state, get up slowly and back out of the room.
No.2 - The toothbrush syndrome
Admire a girl for her practicality when she brings a tooth brush to your house. Fear the girl who leaves one behind, for she has begun moving in and this is her first little suitcase.One way to solve this problem is to carry the offending toothbrush around in your pocket and next time you see her, give it back. Play the dumb-guy card and say: “I thought you might need it.” Repeat when necessary.
No.1 - Meeting the Fockers
When a girl arranges, requests or suggests meeting her parents, you have clearly left her bedroom and walked into her life. If there is a way out, then dammit man, get out. But if you’re locked in, just get through as best you can by sticking to conversations about weather, current events and family pets. Don’t crack jokes and avoid discussing politics, money or religion.Also, don’t let your guard down around her father; never forget that he knows you’re sleeping with his little girl.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-ways-to-tell-your-casual-relationship-isnt-casual.html
It's normal to have feelings of self-consciousness when getting naked for the first time with a new woman. To reduce pre-sex anxiety, we've put together a list of the top 10 tips for looking better naked. The best part is that all of our tips are focused on the short-term, which means that if you follow them, you'll look better naked by tonight.
No.10 - Don't wear tight clothes the evening of
Your sartorial selections for the night in question have an impact on how you'll look naked. Garments that are fitted a little too closely to your body will create embarrassing marks on your skin, thus, steer clear of skinny jeans, pants that are snug around your middle and shirts or jackets that pull. Dress pants or jeans that fit just right and a button-down with some breathing room are superior options to ensure that you look better naked.
No.9 - Adjust the lighting
It's understandable that in order to enjoy all the sexy visuals your partner's body has to offer you don't want to do it in the dark. At the same time, no one looks their best, including you, under ultra-bright lighting. So, flip the dimmer or switch to candlelight to create a soft glow that will virtually erase fine lines and even out skin tone. Bonus: You'll set a more mood-enhancing ambiance and she'll be wowed by your “romantic” instincts.
No.8 - Don't sit naked
Sure, sitting is a lot more comfortable than standing, but this posture also compresses all the fat from your midsection, particularly if you slouch, creating unsightly belly rolls. In fact, it's probably one of the most unappealing looks you could adopt while naked. For muscles that appear more taut, stand up or lie down. Fortunately, there are enough horizontal and vertical positions to keep both you and her more than satisfied.
No.7 - Smell good
Our next tip for looking better naked involves scent. Females use smell to assist with mate selection, so never underestimate the importance of your scent to the opposite sex. Spritzing on an enticing cologne that complements your natural body odor will encourage her to ask you to spend the night in the first place, and smelling great when you're naked will solidify the impression in her mind that you're an incredibly attractive and amazing lover.
No.6 - Stand up straight
In addition to making you look like a hunchback, slouching gives others the impression you are shorter and fatter than is actually the case. In contrast, standing up straight will flatten out your midsection so that your body will look longer and leaner, your shoulders broader and your chest firmer. Furthermore, an erect posture conveys dominance and body confidence, both of which drive women wild. To stand proud, imagine a rope running through your body and pulling you up from your head.
No.5 - Avoid beer
At 150 calories per bottle, beer is one of the most caloric alcoholic beverages. It's also loaded with carbs, which means that your body will treat it like sugar, an easy source of energy, resulting in a slower metabolism and fat shedding process. What's more, the carbonation in beer can cause bloating, making your body and face look puffy.The smart choice when you're on a date is, therefore, to avoid beer altogether, favoring wine or spirits instead. This will go a long way to in helping you look better naked. Remember not to overdo it with any alcoholic drinks, though, as excessive consumption increases the chances that while you'll feel more revved up, your driver won't be ready to go when you need him to most.
No.4 - Stay hydrated
When you're naked all you're “wearing” is your skin, so it's important to keep it in top shape. Drinking plenty of fluids will help you reach that goal in two ways. First, staying sufficiently hydrated will plump up your cells, minimizing any wrinkles on your face. Also, a lack of liquids results in dry, scaly skin all over your body, whereas consuming enough liquids will give you softer, smoother skin. But beware of loading up on high-calorie drinks like juice that can pack on pounds. Instead, choose H2O or a no-calorie sports drink, particularly if you're active or find the taste of regular water a little boring, to keep your skin nourished and you full of energy.
No.3 - Remove unflattering body hair
While women expect men to have a certain amount of body hair, finding out that her new lover is King Kong can kill her desire. Before the big night, conduct an honest appraisal of your body hair and remove any surplus. All back hair needs to go and if you have an excessive amount of chest hair, consider getting rid of that too -- or at least trimming it. As well, a little manscaping down there never hurt anyone and will make your member appear half an inch larger. Finally, remember that a little hair removal goes a long way, so don't go overboard with shaving and waxing as women are freaked out by men who have less hair than they do.
No.2 - Eat in moderation and avoid white foods
Half the battle of looking good naked is won if you have a varied diet full of lean meat, fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and fiber. In general, you should aim to eliminate sugar, flour and other white-colored, refined foods from your diet as much as possible. When you have a hot date, however, you should take extra care to avoid these foods as they cause water retention, which translates into an unattractive, distended midsection in a matter of hours. Downing supersize portions will have a similar effect, so eat sensibly when dining out. Make healthy choices at the restaurant by swapping the bread basket for a salad, moving on to a main course based on lean protein and skipping dessert.
No.1 - Do high-intensity interval training before you go out
Fitting in a 20- to 30-minute workout prior to meeting up with your date will really make your muscles “pop” for the next several hours. To achieve the most ripped look possible, even if you haven't got much time, do high-intensity interval training that concentrates on building a powerful core. The endorphin rush you get from exercising will also boost your body confidence, and in turn, her perception of how you look naked.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-tips-for-looking-better-naked.html
No.10 - Don't wear tight clothes the evening of
Your sartorial selections for the night in question have an impact on how you'll look naked. Garments that are fitted a little too closely to your body will create embarrassing marks on your skin, thus, steer clear of skinny jeans, pants that are snug around your middle and shirts or jackets that pull. Dress pants or jeans that fit just right and a button-down with some breathing room are superior options to ensure that you look better naked.
No.9 - Adjust the lighting
It's understandable that in order to enjoy all the sexy visuals your partner's body has to offer you don't want to do it in the dark. At the same time, no one looks their best, including you, under ultra-bright lighting. So, flip the dimmer or switch to candlelight to create a soft glow that will virtually erase fine lines and even out skin tone. Bonus: You'll set a more mood-enhancing ambiance and she'll be wowed by your “romantic” instincts.
No.8 - Don't sit naked
Sure, sitting is a lot more comfortable than standing, but this posture also compresses all the fat from your midsection, particularly if you slouch, creating unsightly belly rolls. In fact, it's probably one of the most unappealing looks you could adopt while naked. For muscles that appear more taut, stand up or lie down. Fortunately, there are enough horizontal and vertical positions to keep both you and her more than satisfied.
No.7 - Smell good
Our next tip for looking better naked involves scent. Females use smell to assist with mate selection, so never underestimate the importance of your scent to the opposite sex. Spritzing on an enticing cologne that complements your natural body odor will encourage her to ask you to spend the night in the first place, and smelling great when you're naked will solidify the impression in her mind that you're an incredibly attractive and amazing lover.
No.6 - Stand up straight
In addition to making you look like a hunchback, slouching gives others the impression you are shorter and fatter than is actually the case. In contrast, standing up straight will flatten out your midsection so that your body will look longer and leaner, your shoulders broader and your chest firmer. Furthermore, an erect posture conveys dominance and body confidence, both of which drive women wild. To stand proud, imagine a rope running through your body and pulling you up from your head.
No.5 - Avoid beer
At 150 calories per bottle, beer is one of the most caloric alcoholic beverages. It's also loaded with carbs, which means that your body will treat it like sugar, an easy source of energy, resulting in a slower metabolism and fat shedding process. What's more, the carbonation in beer can cause bloating, making your body and face look puffy.The smart choice when you're on a date is, therefore, to avoid beer altogether, favoring wine or spirits instead. This will go a long way to in helping you look better naked. Remember not to overdo it with any alcoholic drinks, though, as excessive consumption increases the chances that while you'll feel more revved up, your driver won't be ready to go when you need him to most.
No.4 - Stay hydrated
When you're naked all you're “wearing” is your skin, so it's important to keep it in top shape. Drinking plenty of fluids will help you reach that goal in two ways. First, staying sufficiently hydrated will plump up your cells, minimizing any wrinkles on your face. Also, a lack of liquids results in dry, scaly skin all over your body, whereas consuming enough liquids will give you softer, smoother skin. But beware of loading up on high-calorie drinks like juice that can pack on pounds. Instead, choose H2O or a no-calorie sports drink, particularly if you're active or find the taste of regular water a little boring, to keep your skin nourished and you full of energy.
No.3 - Remove unflattering body hair
While women expect men to have a certain amount of body hair, finding out that her new lover is King Kong can kill her desire. Before the big night, conduct an honest appraisal of your body hair and remove any surplus. All back hair needs to go and if you have an excessive amount of chest hair, consider getting rid of that too -- or at least trimming it. As well, a little manscaping down there never hurt anyone and will make your member appear half an inch larger. Finally, remember that a little hair removal goes a long way, so don't go overboard with shaving and waxing as women are freaked out by men who have less hair than they do.
No.2 - Eat in moderation and avoid white foods
Half the battle of looking good naked is won if you have a varied diet full of lean meat, fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and fiber. In general, you should aim to eliminate sugar, flour and other white-colored, refined foods from your diet as much as possible. When you have a hot date, however, you should take extra care to avoid these foods as they cause water retention, which translates into an unattractive, distended midsection in a matter of hours. Downing supersize portions will have a similar effect, so eat sensibly when dining out. Make healthy choices at the restaurant by swapping the bread basket for a salad, moving on to a main course based on lean protein and skipping dessert.
No.1 - Do high-intensity interval training before you go out
Fitting in a 20- to 30-minute workout prior to meeting up with your date will really make your muscles “pop” for the next several hours. To achieve the most ripped look possible, even if you haven't got much time, do high-intensity interval training that concentrates on building a powerful core. The endorphin rush you get from exercising will also boost your body confidence, and in turn, her perception of how you look naked.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-tips-for-looking-better-naked.html
For many, marriage is the final blossoming of a loving relationship. But before you take that giant leap, you need to be absolutely sure that you're doing it for all the right reasons.I've read countless testimonials from readers whose marriages have been plagued with misfortune and, ultimately, ended in divorce. And if there's a common link that runs throughout, it's that many couples believed they were ready without having ever really considered what marriage entails. And while everyone's situation is different, there are a handful of recurring circumstances in which planning a wedding is a bad idea.Now, I'm in no way, shape or form implying that you should nix marriage altogether just because some of the following points apply to your relationship; it just means that you might want to give the idea of wedded bliss some extra thought. So here are the top 10 reasons you might want to hold off on saying "I do."
No.10 - She's a "sweet girl"
Finding that special someone can be both an arduous and lengthy task. So when you do come across a universally acceptable gal (the kind you'd take home to meet your folks), you may feel tempted to take her off the market, so to speak.But as sweet, pretty and well-educated as she may be, it won't mean much if your personalities don't jive. Her prim and proper behavior should come in second to sharing similar tastes, interests and goals. Remember: She has to be right for you, not everyone else.
No.9 - You've been dating forever
Don't get me wrong: I applaud any romance that can withstand the test of time. And it's great that what began as a teenage crush blossomed into a full-blown romance. But let's face it: If she was someone you wanted to spend the rest of your life with, wouldn't you have asked her by now?Somewhere in your subconscious there are valid issues that are keeping you from getting engaged. Regardless, don't worry about the years you've already invested; think about all the future ones you'll spoil by doing something that just doesn't feel right.
No.8 - All your friends are doing it
It's normal that you want to hop aboard current trends, but unlike sporting a new pair of shades, this "monkey see-monkey do" approach should not apply to marriage. Being the only unwed guy in the group may feel a little awkward, but it's nothing compared to the agony you'll feel by getting hitched just to ensure that you're not the odd man out.
No.7 - To please your parents
Attempting to get the parental thumbs-up for your choice of bride may be a smart way of alleviating some additional conflict (i.e. all those "your mother hates me" speeches). A marriage, however, is not a group endeavor, and the fact that your parents think she's an angel sent from heaven won't count for much in making the relationship work. In other words, put your feelings first; all you can do is just hope that mom and dad approve.
No.6 - It's the logical next step
Most men seem to think that marriage is just one of those logical steps in the sequence of life (Job? Check. Car? Check. Marriage?). But just because you have a great career and a nice house, that doesn't mean you should complete the package with a trip down the aisle. When it comes to settling down, nothing is written in stone. Everyone takes different paths in life, and it's possible that yours won't necessarily include tuxedo fittings and church rehearsals in the near future.
No.5 - You feel that you "owe" it to her
OK, so she's tolerated those countless nights you spent in bars and strip clubs, endured your sloppy ways, and remained loyal amid your jealous outbursts, but does that mean you should reward her with an engagement ring?The problem is you'll never be able to pay off this "debt," at least not through marriage if your heart isn't in it. And no matter what you have done, forking your life over as collateral is not a smart move.
No.4 - She's putting pressure on you
Before you get flattered by the idea that she wants to devote her entire future to making you a better person, you need to determine if changing yourself is a mutual decision. Giving up smoking or going back to school will never work if you aren't self-motivated. And if you aren't willing or ready to mold yourself into her ideal man, you will only resent her for trying to change you.
No.3 - She caught you off guard
In one of life's unpredictable turn of events, by some freak miracle, she proposed to you. And being on the spot, coupled with the fact that you're head over heels for her, may lead you to say "yes" without giving it enough consideration.But if you have even the slightest doubt, take the time to mull it over. There's always that odd chance that she only asked because she knew you wouldn't say yes. And forget about withdrawing your response at a later date; calling off the wedding once she's begun preparing will render her twice as enraged than if you had said "no" or "let's wait" in the first place.
No.2 - You're close to her family
You love her mom's cooking, her dad's a great mentor to you, and her brother is one of your closest friends. But it's not her family that you will have to share a bed with for the rest of your life. Hence, focus on finding the right individual rather than the right group. It's very likely that if you get along with her, your in-laws will be just as special.
No.1 - She's having your baby
Bottom line: Kids do not make marriages work. It may not be in your, her, or a child's best interest to see two parents subject themselves to a marriage of convenience. Work together to come up with the best solution, but remember that there is a third party involved. And your child will be the one who suffers most should his/her parents force themselves into a family mold.Let the above predicament serve as a model for those couples who engage in sexual activity without taking the necessary precautions, and reap the consequences thereof.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-worst-reasons-to-marry-her.html
No.10 - She's a "sweet girl"
Finding that special someone can be both an arduous and lengthy task. So when you do come across a universally acceptable gal (the kind you'd take home to meet your folks), you may feel tempted to take her off the market, so to speak.But as sweet, pretty and well-educated as she may be, it won't mean much if your personalities don't jive. Her prim and proper behavior should come in second to sharing similar tastes, interests and goals. Remember: She has to be right for you, not everyone else.
No.9 - You've been dating forever
Don't get me wrong: I applaud any romance that can withstand the test of time. And it's great that what began as a teenage crush blossomed into a full-blown romance. But let's face it: If she was someone you wanted to spend the rest of your life with, wouldn't you have asked her by now?Somewhere in your subconscious there are valid issues that are keeping you from getting engaged. Regardless, don't worry about the years you've already invested; think about all the future ones you'll spoil by doing something that just doesn't feel right.
No.8 - All your friends are doing it
It's normal that you want to hop aboard current trends, but unlike sporting a new pair of shades, this "monkey see-monkey do" approach should not apply to marriage. Being the only unwed guy in the group may feel a little awkward, but it's nothing compared to the agony you'll feel by getting hitched just to ensure that you're not the odd man out.
No.7 - To please your parents
Attempting to get the parental thumbs-up for your choice of bride may be a smart way of alleviating some additional conflict (i.e. all those "your mother hates me" speeches). A marriage, however, is not a group endeavor, and the fact that your parents think she's an angel sent from heaven won't count for much in making the relationship work. In other words, put your feelings first; all you can do is just hope that mom and dad approve.
No.6 - It's the logical next step
Most men seem to think that marriage is just one of those logical steps in the sequence of life (Job? Check. Car? Check. Marriage?). But just because you have a great career and a nice house, that doesn't mean you should complete the package with a trip down the aisle. When it comes to settling down, nothing is written in stone. Everyone takes different paths in life, and it's possible that yours won't necessarily include tuxedo fittings and church rehearsals in the near future.
No.5 - You feel that you "owe" it to her
OK, so she's tolerated those countless nights you spent in bars and strip clubs, endured your sloppy ways, and remained loyal amid your jealous outbursts, but does that mean you should reward her with an engagement ring?The problem is you'll never be able to pay off this "debt," at least not through marriage if your heart isn't in it. And no matter what you have done, forking your life over as collateral is not a smart move.
No.4 - She's putting pressure on you
Before you get flattered by the idea that she wants to devote her entire future to making you a better person, you need to determine if changing yourself is a mutual decision. Giving up smoking or going back to school will never work if you aren't self-motivated. And if you aren't willing or ready to mold yourself into her ideal man, you will only resent her for trying to change you.
No.3 - She caught you off guard
In one of life's unpredictable turn of events, by some freak miracle, she proposed to you. And being on the spot, coupled with the fact that you're head over heels for her, may lead you to say "yes" without giving it enough consideration.But if you have even the slightest doubt, take the time to mull it over. There's always that odd chance that she only asked because she knew you wouldn't say yes. And forget about withdrawing your response at a later date; calling off the wedding once she's begun preparing will render her twice as enraged than if you had said "no" or "let's wait" in the first place.
No.2 - You're close to her family
You love her mom's cooking, her dad's a great mentor to you, and her brother is one of your closest friends. But it's not her family that you will have to share a bed with for the rest of your life. Hence, focus on finding the right individual rather than the right group. It's very likely that if you get along with her, your in-laws will be just as special.
No.1 - She's having your baby
Bottom line: Kids do not make marriages work. It may not be in your, her, or a child's best interest to see two parents subject themselves to a marriage of convenience. Work together to come up with the best solution, but remember that there is a third party involved. And your child will be the one who suffers most should his/her parents force themselves into a family mold.Let the above predicament serve as a model for those couples who engage in sexual activity without taking the necessary precautions, and reap the consequences thereof.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-worst-reasons-to-marry-her.html
Top 10: Signs She'll Be A Bad Mother
No.10 - She's self-destructive
A man wants the mother of his children to be responsible. That’s why driving too fast, eating too much or engaging in any sort of high-risk behavior are all signs she’ll be a bad mother. Self-destructive behavior takes many forms. It could mean anything from substance abuse to simple recklessness. Self-destructive people are unstable and potentially even dangerous.You don’t want to bring a child into a chaotic environment and you don’t want to risk your partner’s self-destructive behavior being passed down to your kids.
No.9 - She doesn't want kids
This one might seem like a no-brainer, but for some reason guys tend to think that every woman will “come around” to the idea of children eventually. It’s not true. If a woman says she doesn’t want kids, believe her. Trying to turn a woman who hates kids into your baby mama is a recipe for disaster. You might think her biological clock will inevitably start ticking or that her “maternal instincts” will take over once she has kids, but it doesn’t necessarily work that way.
No.8 - She’s obsessively materialistic
There are severe problems with obsessive materialism. Obviously it’s a serious drain on funds, but it could also mean she has some kind of hole in her soul she’s trying to fill up with designer clothes or fancy gadgets.As a mother, her materialism could manifest itself in a couple ways. She might pass her obsession with stuff onto your kid, turning him into a spoiled brat. Alternatively, she might treat your kid as an accessory. It’s likely your materialistic partner is obsessed with status. If so, she’ll dress your newborn in designer baby clothes and spend $1,000 on a stroller just to outdo the other new moms in her social circle.
No.7 - She's self-centered
If she only cares about herself now, that’s not going to change once she has a kid, and a self-centered mom can really screw up a child. At this point, you may just find her narcissism annoying, but you’re a fully formed and capable guy who isn’t desperate for her love and affection. The same cannot be said of a kid. A mother (just like a father) has to put her family first in all instances.
No.6 - She's a party animal
If she spends most weekends boozing with her gal-pals on a girl's night out and can’t stand hanging out at home on a Saturday night, consider it a red flag. It’s another one of the top 10 signs she’ll be a bad mother. Having kids means spending more time at home, especially with a baby. She’ll have to compromise on some of her social time. If she won’t do it now, she won’t do it when the kid comes.
No.5 - She's obsessed with staying young
If she obsesses over every wrinkle and can’t go five minutes without reminiscing about her glory days in high school or college, that’s a sign she’ll be a bad mother.One of two things will happen with a girl like that. She’ll either try to be the cool best-friend mom, which means buying beer for your 16-year-old, or she’ll try to regain her former glory by living vicariously through her kids. Next thing you know, your toddler is in a beauty pageant.
No.4 - She's not nurturing
Does she take care of you like a nanny when you're sick? Does she worry about you a little too much? Is she generous with hugs? Has she ever made you breakfast in bed? If the answer to all of those questions is no, she’s not nurturing.It may get on your nerves when she tells you to put your coat on or when she asks about every minute detail of your day, but that type of behavior is exactly what you want in your child’s mother.
No.3 - She's impatient
Patience is a necessity for mothers, especially when it comes to babies and young children. Little kids are unreasonable. They don’t listen and they need constant attention and affection. They throw tantrums and spill stuff. A parent needs to understand this and take all these inconveniences in stride. If you find she’s quick tempered now, imagine what she’ll be like with a toddler.
No.2 - She's a complete perfectionist
There’s nothing wrong with having high standards. In fact, that’s probably a quality you’re looking for in a partner. The problem comes when those standards become unrealistic. Is she frets over her 1% body fat or tries to upstage Martha Stewart every time she hosts a dinner party, it’s a sign she’ll be a bad mother. If she can’t tolerate the slightest of failures and imperfections, it's going to turn your kid into a nervous, self-conscious wreck.
No.1 - She's violent
Violence is an absolute deal-breaker. If your partner is violent, either with you or with others, and if she ever tries to solve problems using physical force, she can’t be the mother of your children. In fact, you shouldn’t even be in a relationship with her. The prime directive for all parents is to provide a safe environment for their children to grow up in. That means a house free from physical or mental abuse. Violent behavior of any kind tops our list of the top 10 signs she’ll be a bad mother.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-signs-shell-be-a-bad-mother.html
A man wants the mother of his children to be responsible. That’s why driving too fast, eating too much or engaging in any sort of high-risk behavior are all signs she’ll be a bad mother. Self-destructive behavior takes many forms. It could mean anything from substance abuse to simple recklessness. Self-destructive people are unstable and potentially even dangerous.You don’t want to bring a child into a chaotic environment and you don’t want to risk your partner’s self-destructive behavior being passed down to your kids.
No.9 - She doesn't want kids
This one might seem like a no-brainer, but for some reason guys tend to think that every woman will “come around” to the idea of children eventually. It’s not true. If a woman says she doesn’t want kids, believe her. Trying to turn a woman who hates kids into your baby mama is a recipe for disaster. You might think her biological clock will inevitably start ticking or that her “maternal instincts” will take over once she has kids, but it doesn’t necessarily work that way.
No.8 - She’s obsessively materialistic
There are severe problems with obsessive materialism. Obviously it’s a serious drain on funds, but it could also mean she has some kind of hole in her soul she’s trying to fill up with designer clothes or fancy gadgets.As a mother, her materialism could manifest itself in a couple ways. She might pass her obsession with stuff onto your kid, turning him into a spoiled brat. Alternatively, she might treat your kid as an accessory. It’s likely your materialistic partner is obsessed with status. If so, she’ll dress your newborn in designer baby clothes and spend $1,000 on a stroller just to outdo the other new moms in her social circle.
No.7 - She's self-centered
If she only cares about herself now, that’s not going to change once she has a kid, and a self-centered mom can really screw up a child. At this point, you may just find her narcissism annoying, but you’re a fully formed and capable guy who isn’t desperate for her love and affection. The same cannot be said of a kid. A mother (just like a father) has to put her family first in all instances.
No.6 - She's a party animal
If she spends most weekends boozing with her gal-pals on a girl's night out and can’t stand hanging out at home on a Saturday night, consider it a red flag. It’s another one of the top 10 signs she’ll be a bad mother. Having kids means spending more time at home, especially with a baby. She’ll have to compromise on some of her social time. If she won’t do it now, she won’t do it when the kid comes.
No.5 - She's obsessed with staying young
If she obsesses over every wrinkle and can’t go five minutes without reminiscing about her glory days in high school or college, that’s a sign she’ll be a bad mother.One of two things will happen with a girl like that. She’ll either try to be the cool best-friend mom, which means buying beer for your 16-year-old, or she’ll try to regain her former glory by living vicariously through her kids. Next thing you know, your toddler is in a beauty pageant.
No.4 - She's not nurturing
Does she take care of you like a nanny when you're sick? Does she worry about you a little too much? Is she generous with hugs? Has she ever made you breakfast in bed? If the answer to all of those questions is no, she’s not nurturing.It may get on your nerves when she tells you to put your coat on or when she asks about every minute detail of your day, but that type of behavior is exactly what you want in your child’s mother.
No.3 - She's impatient
Patience is a necessity for mothers, especially when it comes to babies and young children. Little kids are unreasonable. They don’t listen and they need constant attention and affection. They throw tantrums and spill stuff. A parent needs to understand this and take all these inconveniences in stride. If you find she’s quick tempered now, imagine what she’ll be like with a toddler.
No.2 - She's a complete perfectionist
There’s nothing wrong with having high standards. In fact, that’s probably a quality you’re looking for in a partner. The problem comes when those standards become unrealistic. Is she frets over her 1% body fat or tries to upstage Martha Stewart every time she hosts a dinner party, it’s a sign she’ll be a bad mother. If she can’t tolerate the slightest of failures and imperfections, it's going to turn your kid into a nervous, self-conscious wreck.
No.1 - She's violent
Violence is an absolute deal-breaker. If your partner is violent, either with you or with others, and if she ever tries to solve problems using physical force, she can’t be the mother of your children. In fact, you shouldn’t even be in a relationship with her. The prime directive for all parents is to provide a safe environment for their children to grow up in. That means a house free from physical or mental abuse. Violent behavior of any kind tops our list of the top 10 signs she’ll be a bad mother.
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-signs-shell-be-a-bad-mother.html
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