10 Sept 2016...... Final round ....no physical but therapeutic

08 Sep2016 - 1 hour lunch, 1830 - 2330 = 6 hours => 112 hours
09 sept 2016 - 1000-2330 => 13 hours => 125 hours
10 Sept 2016   1200-2330 => 11.5 hours => 136.5 hours
11 Sept 2016   1200 - 2330 => 16.5 hours => 148 hours

Confession 100th hour
Storhub = 102th hour

The big "reward" yesterday was around 1730-1800? Or 1800-1830 => 118th hours
Revisit => site => 130th hour

morning self-high and heigthen state

lost sprint and sumo both on first round. ...with K....so find time to spend with her.... Shared Jiu xian with her...bought by jie jie Jess


Went science centre for a while....bought lunch together.....for the students. Watched the finals of NJRC
Ate lunch together.... we discuss about yesterday.....
Mentioned I can't remember what was the trigger between hands on shoulder to hands on butt.
Was review where were the checkpoints...which she was asking why re-visit. I rationale with her that it is part of facing the truth....a process of counselling. A process of healing....

Also as she mentioned that her body started to feel warm and hot. then the unknown why trigger..... 1st location, some stop which is politely asked....but yet continue a bit more....then move to a second place, just 90 degree to the first.....and continued.....for a longer period of time....which I ask her why did she said stop.....she said she is feeling warm tooo hot....and she is not used to saying no....always being giving in.  then we talking about other things....in the end she felt better.... about herself....and how I was think....which sadly it at 2nd location then my mind is thinking of something. at the 1st location, my mind isn't thinking...all at the top floor of my old place.... which today we went to take photo...ops

It still concern me but it shows that I will need to be the gate keeper.....Just do more work.... well it is worth it....  Also ask her to hug me with some distance and the close hip to hip hug.... even telling her...hip to hip hug.. as long as she recognise the difference. the two hug.

I was also in a heighten state in the morning..... linking to the effect from last evening...delayed effect.... I was at the front and I was really sensitive....luckily I was in front..... but i was really sooo high up.....anyone can just send waves into me. somewhat last till 12 noon. I learnt she can be a firm say no person/ That made me love her more.


Thank God for his faithfulness......a silly idea in midst of worship .....the faithful of God in my life...poured into me.

10-13 minutes of eye look.......I can feel the urge....then sense her urge....then woah...we are creating new ways....then i forgot to signal her to kiss on check...totally forgot as wanted to debrief the long eye interaction

So send her back...used her home bathroom....help her set them free...then thought she didn't wear and accompany me down...zzzz....she ate something....more peck on her cheers for the day.
Then which is now...leep
sleep

She mentioned ow her story.... her ability to change people view..... for bgf t o

08 Sept 2016 - round 3 and we really go quite far...... Unbelieveable but it is all under control

08 Sep2016 - 1 hour lunch, 1830 - 2330 = 6 hours => 112 hours
09 Sept 2016 - 0930 - 2330 = 14 hours => 126 hours

It started on about 2000 - 108-109th hour

The day of execution has come. We met for lunch even though my colleague asked me where I going for lunch. And she sort of guess that I am going out for lunch with my GF. We had a simple lunch, chit chat. Talk about what to do during weekend...just merely enjoy each other company...she also talked about her work....give thanks.... favour in her work. I just hear her out....listen and agree....just listening to all these. But really it is heart to heart....with no barrier....just really being there for her....though I think I should up my listening skill.... engaging listening.

I also Thank God that I managed to finish my important urgent work....Just left some to clear that is not sooo urgent. Well work was easy for me then.... Well rest abit and looked forward to dinner with K.

So on the way she mentioned she was pissed off......omg....hope fully that pissed off will not cause any disruption of the night activity. So first thing is to comfort her.....and allow her to ventilate. A ventilated girl is easy to predict than a bottled-up girl....as a bottled-up girl is more capable to more compulsive and impulsive. So we talked and relaxed.....just held hands ....chit chat about anything....just like as per normal..... walked up and down coz Storhub does not have toilet....haha.... it is a walk journey.... just a walk....

So when we reach storhub..... preparation of place....showed her the bear allow her to hug. Also after preparing the venue, I shared with her the plan.... all the learning outcome and objective. I also told her that I dun understand why should I plan such a thing...... or even think about it. After going through what is the activity and rationale once....though I think she is fearful.... I repeat the activity in detail.... let her know she has all right to say stop or say no...but she just agreeable to it.... Here is the activity planned

STORHUB Experiential Learning Activities

Learning Objective:

1. Reaction and responds to limits
2. Choice making
3. Consideration of possible consequence
4. Consequence management
5. Sharing of plans and ideas

Venue: Storhub Toa Payoh

Duration: 30 + 13 + 40 + 40 = up to 123 minutes

• Strict compliance is needed and enforced. Failure of compliance can lead undesired outcome or not achieving the learning objective. As a deterrence, if one party fails any compliance, he/she is obliged to complete a task that the other has asked, within allowable and permissive limits.  The recipient is allowed to negotiate for a similar but more comfortable punishment.
• Certain wear is recommended but not required. This is to facilitate the activity only. Shirt or sleeve clothes are not advised. Jeans is not advised too.
• At any point either party can stop the activity temporarily or permanently. Reflection will need to be followed through after
• Alternative method of execution of activity are allowed. E.g. Discussion or Simulation. The activity and method suggested here are meant to be a guide and it is one sided.

Activity Schedule

Duration	Activity	Rationale
Preparation (30 minutes)
10 minutes	Tour of Storhub room Shifting of 2 board games boxes out	Familiarisation of location. Setting up of location for conducive environment for activity
About 10 minutes	Sharing of Activity plan	Sharing of ideas and plans, open communication
About 5 minutes	Laying out possible outlook	More of understanding and just being me. Also managing expectation and hearing possible reaction/responds
About 5 minutes	Preparation to execute Activity All the TnC and the limits setting and the open conditio	Set the framework and regulation of the activity so that it will be within allowable limits to avoid unforeseen circumstances of dire consequences
Execution of Activity (13 minutes)
2 x 2 + 1 minutes	2 minutes of individual insolation in the place	To observe own reaction of being in an enclosed space though knowing someone is still outside still - Biblical reference
2 + 1 minutes	2 minutes of being together in the place	To observe the feelings together in a place, and as compare to individual
About 5 minutes	Preparation to execute Next Activity All the TnC and the limits setting and the open conditio	Set the framework and regulation of the activity so that it will be within allowable limits to avoid unforeseen circumstances of dire consequences
Execution of Next Activity (40 + 40 minutes)
20 minutes	Execution of her part. She is the main recipient Always seeks clearance and permission before proceeding to the next step. It is fluid and any point intervention can be introduced. Both parties can vary the execution so long the learning objective is met, within permitted limits	For the recognition of the vulnerability and any possible feelings and desires. Also about choice making reaction and responds leading towards a consequence, mindset and thoughts. Also can be sharing, communication in awkward purpose.
20 minutes	Prediction and simulation Status Quo, if possible, seek to understand and explore what are the possible outcome when others options. Scenario finding	With the current state, it may be easier to simulate further scenario as the current situation may lead to. Also to observe all the learning outcome for both parties Limits need to be strictly adhered at all times
20 minutes	Since She done 2 things, He will need to do for her 2 things. Negotiable and within permitted limit. His limit has to be the same as the previous activity and of similar nature	Eye for eye. Observe learning outcome for both parties Limits need to be strictly adhered at all times
20 minutes	Final reflection for both party, in a safe or compromised state so long factors are considered.	Learning of each other and other learning
Ice Cream at Toa payoh mac	Sundae as usual
1 hr 25 minutes	Travel back + maybe she shared why she like to lay head on shoulder

Others notes:

Activity description

Activity	Description of activity	Any additional activity
Tour of Storhub room	Seeing some of the my belonging….my bear. Also preparing the space needed for activity. And create the needed factor
Sharing of Activity plan	Sharing of the activity schedule and my rationale behind that. Also allow discussion and negotiation for changes or modification if needed according to individual and situation.
Laying out possible outlook	This is to make it clear or understand by both to be aware of the possible consequence and undesired outcome
Individual and paired isolation	Just being alone or in pair with known or unknown duration of time.
Preparation to execute Next Activity	This is to prepare for the next activity. The usual TnC and other factors
Execution of experiential activity	Ask the top first Then store it aside properly Do reflections Then the bottom Then store it properly Do reflections Another further variation
Return of experiential activity	Since she did 2 items, I will need to return the favor of up to similar magnitude in return. In same order too.
Final Reflection	Depending on the state of situation and comfort level, this is to share feelings emotions and all other information Also to reinforce certain things, goals and objective and learning outcome and TnC

My remarks:

Started with simple isolation activity

Tuesday at Pasir Ris Park just “tainted” it all

Led to reluctance and “sadness” why do I allow such taint and why do I have such desires

I believe there is more learning than planned. However it should only be done once, with limits applied.

I am very concerned with all the possible repercussion after this that is not in the conscious but subconscious and other unknown factors

In the end - rather than I plan, it is also the start to share and plan together, perhaps in preparation for further situation ahead or other life matters

She is really feeling scared and nervous. However she still trusted me and willing to go through it..... So we did the isolation that is just a appetizer....just a minor thing as there is light. ....even when are in the same place.....also nothing much....the difference between the 2 chair....then I told her.... I don't need to know the color...but she realise that the difference....so she sat on my lap...... which I sort of suggested in the morning.....in which she asked permission prior....

So as she hug and lay her head on my shoulder..... it just make her feel safe...... as the activity entails, and our hearts decided already of the limits...... however it is a challenge. Especially in such a hot and stuffy place. Well as she hug and feel more secure......and when asked again. She agree.....

It was really a slow mo moment ....as sleeved and with strap.....it is a slow process to remove however first the behind....... off it goes ...then the sides......than slowly thru the APit hole...which is quite small but yet still can pull it out.....there is the under.....no cushion ......just a simple one.  It is then placed in a bag. So there after that continue to still sit on my lap.......and we continue.......she continue to hug....and lay her head on my shoulder..... so I did ask repeatly again and again.....she can stop it if she don't wish to continue...... To me in my mind and body, it is just a job, something to be executed. .... The mind is in full control...thinking what to do next......focus on the main objective....and observing all the signs and things for debriefing later..... it is an experiential experience for her...... also a release of anything possible....a weird way. To be set free if possible. Though it will open up doors.... well it is a start of sharing of plans together...she is involved and she is open to change things around.

So the next phase......as she nodded and verbalised.......so one first.......then I was nottie to move my hand up......then after awhile she nodded and clear the second layer....... so she went back to her favourite seat..... which sat for quite a while..... ... I was continuously checking on her.....asking but she didn't really reveal much but only after the whole thing. She did thought of it. ..... I stopped short of it.... coz I was not prepared to go all the way.....

After this, it is my turn....she didn't really think too much.....asked of the same thing......and she just poke my tummy lol....... and after that she asked for my J...... ok.....I reminded her on J and dun take advantage of everything...... so we keep it to limits.  So she could see it all....in plain side view as there is light....

So after a while, I reminded I am now more vulnerable than her....she is still in her dress....so I wore back mine.....and I ask permission....she do it herself or I help put back.....she selected the later.... the P and covering layer is easy......we struggle with the top layer.....so I notice a zip at the back.....after squeezing in where it managed to squeeze out.....then straighten up things with a zip behind...all the way to the waist.... help straighten and I panic abit in case I spoilt something.... it was sight....from the back..... I could had just pull it down from behind.....well before the thought can take root...up goes the zip.

We looked at each other and smile......with thank giving in our heart.  and we left....the most unfortunate thing is we didn't get to eat our sundae....even the day after

Rationale and conclusion for my side is clear and state in the plan
Hers is similar after asking the day after...... she also want to know her limits too.....

Not sure what it opens up.... But well thank God for it all....and it is all within limits.....