13 Characteristics of likable people

1. Smiling - People who are at ease, confident, and happy tendto smile, and that smile puts people at ease. Smiling shows thatyou're pleased to see someone which can be really flattering. Ifyou want to change one thing to come across more social, smile abig smile. Sometimes you will not feel in the mood to smile -however, if you choose to smile anyway you'll still get the greatresults.

2. Eye contact - Maintaining eye contact when you talk tosomeone draws them deep into conversation with you - the rest ofthe world slows down, and you both become quite important to eachother. It shows a calm confidence in what they are saying and itmakes them even more engaging, almost hypnotic. A quick tip: Righteye to right eye. Look from your right eye to the right eye of theperson you're talking to. This strikes a great balance between goodeye contact and not staring.

3. Touch - You'll consistently see magnetic people reach out andtouch others. Touching shows emotion and affection and brings youcloser to other people. Humans crave physical contact with others,and more emotion and affection can be expressed through touch thanany number of words ever could. Next time someone does or sayssomething you really like, give them a high five, some "pound", aplayful punch on the arm or a big hug.

4. Not talking about yourself - Likable people typically aremore curious to get to know other people and don't talk aboutthemselves as much. Likable people are always looking to find outmore about the other person, what they are doing, and whatinterests them the most. Most people don't feel heard - likablepeople know this, and encourage others to talk about what theyreally enjoy.

5. Not talking too much - Closely related to the above point.Likable people and high status people do not talk too much. Insteadthey encourage others to talk and to open up. People love to talkabout their experiences and cool things they've done - when youbecome more curious and encourage them to speak more, they'llactually like you more. If you catch yourself rambling for a while,an easy way to adjust is to say, "But that's enough about me - whatabout you?"

6. Empathy - Making people feel understood, and striving totruly understand them is powerful. Everyone wants to be understood.People want to know that they are not alone in the world. If youcan reach out to understand another person, you'll instantly form agreat connection with them. Next time someone tells you somethingheavy that you could have a long discussion on, instead try sayingjust "I understand." You'll be amazed at how uplifting it can makeother people feel.

7. Not trying to impress - Somewhat accomplished people wanteveryone to know about the accomplishments they've made. Reallyamazing people are much more humble and low key about what they'vedone. The most impressive people never actively try to impresspeople. The result is that a man trying to impress communicatesthat he's not impressive.

8. Showing praise and appreciation - Whenever you see anythingyou like in another person, let them know. If people aren't used toyou opening up, praising, and appreciating constantly, you mightget a funny reaction at first. Once you've established that you'reconstantly on the lookout for great things in others, people getused to feeling empowered around you. When you do mention somethingyou really like, keep it casual. No big deal, no long talk. Just,"Hey, I really appreciate that you did that." "I thought that wasreally cool how you did that."

9. Never criticizing, ever, for any reason - Likable peoplenever criticize others. People universally hate criticism, and hatepeople that criticize them. Likable people always start off withgenuine praise and appreciation before trying to give constructivefeedback, and will only give this feedback rarely (because likablepeople understand that praise is a much better way to help peoplechange than even constructive feedback, and criticizing is almostalways useless).

10. Not trying to fix other peoples' problems - When someonetells you they have a problem, but doesn't explicitly ask for yourhelp, that means they do not want you to tell them how to solve it.They want to feel understood, cared about, and empowered. Over 90%of the time, people know the solutions to their own problems. Ifsomeone brings a minor problem to you, try listening, nodding,letting them know you understand, and you're with them. Tell themyou believe in them and you think they'll sort it out. If they askwhat you'd do, maybe make a quick suggestion but don't drive thepoint really hard. As crazy as it sounds, most people do not tellothers about their problems in order to get solutions; they wantunderstanding, empathy, and reassurance. People are very strong andquite good at solving their own problems when believed in.

11. Eliminate negativity - Never mentioning anything you don'tlike. Especially never being down on culture-wide things outside ofyour direct control: So, not complaining about the government, popculture, fashions you think are silly, activist groups you disagreewith, and so on. Being positive is really good. Not talking aboutthings you dislike is even more important.

12. Never complain - When people complain, others feel slightlyless inclined to be around them. It brings people down. If youdon't like something, you have two choices: Take action to fix it,or accept that it's there. When you realize that, there's no reasonto complain.

13. Never impose weakness on others - Everyone feels down fromtime to time. The most charismatic people never "impose" that downfeeling on others; instead, they're a fort of strength for peoplearound them. The more you stay composed, and refrain from showingbeing phased or flustered, the more you gain control over yourlife. People start to respect you more, and they feel they can relyon you.